A few weeks ago, I posted a tweet to commemorate my 20th wedding anniversary. Along with a photo from our wedding day, I shared a message reflecting on my battle with cancer. Six months prior to the photo being taken, my university cancer had returned aggressively, and I was given no further treatment. At that time, I didn’t think I would live to see our first anniversary, but now we are celebrating our 20th, and it feels like a miracle.

I wanted to express my gratitude to my husband, Mike, for taking a chance on me. While I had no choice but to live with my Cancer, he chose to build a future with me despite the uncertainty. It takes courage and commitment to build a life on uncertain foundations.

However, it hasn’t been easy. I wanted to share our story of hope with others who may be battling with similar despair. I initially expected only a few likes from friends and colleagues, but the response has been overwhelming. The posts have been seen by over three million people.

Before this experience, I had never considered writing in detail about what I went through. But seeing the comments, shared experiences, and questions from so many people made me realize that there is a need for a discussion about the long-term impact of cancer. While the focus is often on diagnosis and Treatment, there are profound and lasting effects for those fortunate enough to survive. Now, at the age of 50, that is what I want to talk about.

I was diagnosed with melanoma, the worst kind of skin cancer, when I was 20 years old and studying at the University of Oxford. I was taken aback because I hadn’t been exposed to prolonged sunburn or any significant risk factors. The cancer was at stage two, meaning it hadn’t spread beyond the skin. I underwent surgery to remove it, leaving me with a 20 cm scar on my back.

Recovering from cancer at university was a lonely and unsettling experience. While my peers were preoccupied with essays and relationships, my world was turned upside down. Naturally, my grades suffered.

After seven years of regular check-ups, the appointments came to an end. However, at the age of 29, the cancer returned. This time, it had spread to my lymph nodes, and my prognosis was poor. There was no further treatment available, and the statistics were grim. Only one-third of people with a recurrence like mine survived beyond five years. I was told to expect tumors in my brain, lungs, or liver with just months to live once that happened.

A second opinion at the Royal Marsden confirmed that there were no viable options for treatment. It was devastating to realize that the doctors couldn’t do anything to prolong my life. Suddenly, the future that my friends and peers were planning seemed out of reach, while I was faced with the possibility of imminent death.

Despite the fear and uncertainty, Mike asked me to marry him. I debated saying no because I didn’t want to burden him with a short and painful journey. But he reassured me that he just wanted to be with me and support me, regardless of how long I lived. With that, I said yes, and our wedding day was filled with love and tears.

In the early years of our marriage, we lived in the present moment without expectations for the future. We celebrated each milestone, and every check-up brought both relief and increased anxiety. We cherished the moments when there was no cancer present but feared the appointments that could potentially deliver devastating news.

Appointment day became a mix of anticipation and dread. We learned to appreciate the release of an all-clear diagnosis while bracing ourselves for the possibility of a death sentence at the next appointment.

Despite the challenges, we continue to live our lives with gratitude and love. Our journey has taught us to appreciate every moment and to find joy in the face of uncertainty. Cancer may have forever shaped who I am, but it has also taught me resilience, compassion, and the importance of cherishing life.

Now, at the age of 50, I want to share my story and raise awareness about the long-lasting effects of cancer survival. It’s time to have an open discussion about the emotional and psychological impact that cancer can have on individuals and their loved ones. The fight against cancer doesn’t end with treatment, and it’s crucial to support survivors in navigating the challenges they face.

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