When we think of philosophers, we generally imagine someone who writes long complicated passages within the depths of their study, maybe even the classy existentialist discussing the futility of life over a cup of coffee and a cigarette.

And then there’s Diogenes. A homeless man who urinated on people, lived with dogs and masturbated in public. To put it simply, this guy cared little for the opinions of others. In the greatest of accounts Diogenes would roast the philosophers and the rulers of his age only to leave them dumbfounded by his unassuming wit.

He has no written material preserved since his philosophy was more of a doing, than a written system involving acting out what you believe in. Diogenes practiced Cynic values. Cynics believed that the main goal of life was eudaemonia (mental clarity) which could only be achieved by living in accordance with nature and embracing severe self-discipline and abstinence from all forms of indulgence.

Many consider Diogenes to be the founder of cynicism, which, in Greek is kikos, meaning doglike. A popular hypothesis is that it has been derived from the nickname of Diogenes, being called a dog. Specifically, one account in which when seen living amongst the dogs and appearing just as dirty as them he was called a dog by passersby. Not being one to contest such a statement, as being a dog and his philosophy is quite similar, he would embrace the name by urinating on the name callers as a dog would.

When it was time for Diogenes to find some nice real estate Diogenes lived in a clay wine jar on the street his only possession a wooden Bowl when he saw a boy cup his hands and drink water Diogenes threw away his wooden Bowl realizing how materialistic he had become.

One time, Diogenes heard about Plato claiming that he could simply define a man as a featherless biped. Diogenes plucked a chicken and brought it into Plato’s Academy, saying, “Behold! I’ve brought you a man”. This led to Plato hastily revising his definition.

During his stay in Corinth, Alexander the Great, who now rules half of the world, was said to have been passing by, hearing of the strange qualities of our beloved philosopher. Alexander met Diogenes and asked him if there was anything he could do for him. When confronted by such an opportunity, by arguably the most popular figure of that period, Diogenes stated “Yes, get out of my sunlight”. To this, Alexander replied in admiration “If I were not Alexander, I would wish to be Diogenes”. Diogenes retorted “if I were not Diogenes, I would also wish to be Diogenes”.

His death is also ambiguous. Some believe Diogenes simply held his breath and died. Some believe he became sick from eating raw octopus or suffering infection from a dog bite. Whatever finally took Diogenes may never be known. However, when asked about what he would like to happen to his body upon his death, he asked to be thrown over the walls of Corinth with a stick, so he could battle the wild animals trying to eat him. When asked why he would need a stick as he will be unaware of anything, he said “If I lack awareness why should I care what happens to me when I am dead”.

Penned By:

Rtr. Aditha Abeynayake

Editorial Committee Member 23.24