Overall Rating:
“I will do everything I can to get you out of there. I promise. This is my war now, and I know what side I’m on.”
Wow, I was not quite expecting this when I picked up this book! After usually staying away from historical fiction, I can safely say this book has sparked a love for it. What an intense journey! From unhealthy relationships with the Nazi’s to a full on rescue mission, I was pulled in from the start and felt so attached to these characters throughout. I’m thrilled to be sharing my review for Not My War!
About the book:
Louise Bellingham never signed up for a war.
Finally free from her stuffy English boarding school, the fearless and fun-loving Louise is eager to embrace her future. But after she returns home to find Paris under Nazi occupation, she’s quickly dragged into a war that she wants no part in.
Reluctantly plunged into the secretive and dangerous world of the French Resistance, her hopes of fun and excitement are crushed beneath the grueling realities of war. And when she meets the young, handsome Nazi officer Hans, Louise becomes increasingly torn between her loyalty to her family and her newfound feelings for the charming officer.
As tensions rise and emotions threaten to boil over, Louise realizes she won’t be able to ignore the war forever – and when she stumbles upon the horrifying truth behind the Nazi occupation, she’ll be forced to question her deepest beliefs and take a stand for what’s right.
The beginning
Whenever I start a new book, there’s a certain feeling I get in the first chapter when I know it’s going to be a good read. I got that exact feeling again with Not My War, even though this isn’t a genre I read often at all, which was surprising yet so so welcoming! We’re instantly plunged into a 1937 world, where Jewish people were attacked in broad daylight and people were encouraged to spread so much hate to the Jewish community. The shocking scenes, even though super upsetting, were eye-opening and described in such detail. Louise, our main character, was an instant hit for me – even though I did question her wanting anything to do with Nazi soldier, Hans, as well as disappointed she was basically being forced to have a negative view of Jewish people, I still found her to be such a well developed character with so much to learn about the world around her. Hans caught her eye instantly, and I was curious to find out what their relationship would be like, how it would change over time. I felt an unusual sense of excitement reading this, about what I would discover with a genre I tend to overlook.
“I don’t know what you think is so funny. This is no laughing matter, Louise. Perhaps you should take a leaf out of Joséphine’s book and show an interest in what goes on in the world.”
We follow Louise into her mid to late teens and get a real great sense of her personality, her mindset and where she wants to be in her life. Her character development really was excellent! We also observe her relationship with her family, learn of her father’s death and her little brother’s injuries and mental state. My curiosity was piqued – what on earth had happened here? As well as talk of war and the fear it brings, I was completely enthralled by Louise’s life. The Author effortlessly draws you in and makes you crave more with every passing chapter, and I really loved that. However, despite Louise’s new job, her new relationship and a glimmer of hope for her brother, we hear the news everyone (as well as myself) had been dreading. That France had surrendered to the Nazi’s. The author perfectly portrays the dark feeling of dread and uncertainty, and I couldn’t help but step into Louise’s shoes. Everything was going to change. Their lives would be flipped upside down, their safety not guaranteed. The book’s opening was so strong and I was very curious about what would happen now.
The middle
The change in Louise as the story progressed became worrying at times, but it was also completely fascinating to me. As the Nazi’s took over, food and supplies were rationed and Jewish people were taken away to camps. Louise befriends a few people she really should stay away from, but if she was honest, she was enjoying herself. She had friends, good conversation and good food (some of which she could smuggle home for her brother.) Why would she give it all up? The thing about Louise I didn’t really like was how ignorant she was being to everything going on around her, claiming that because she was born in Switzerland, the war was ‘not hers’ (hence the book’s title!) She thinks she can do what she pleases, not really thinking much about those around her and not really being supportive. I hoped this would change! The detail from the author about life at this time was exceptional, and each paragraph was so easy to visualise. I became lost in each chapter and if I’m honest, I felt like I’d learned more about these years in this book than I ever did at school!
“I couldn’t hear their words but knew exactly what they were asking. As she turned and pointed in my direction, my scalp prickled, my brain told me to run, and my body remained frozen in fear. They know.”
Reuniting with Hans after so much time apart made me feel so many things. On the one hand, I was somewhat happy that Louise was able to rekindle what she’d experienced with Hans four years previously (and boy does she fall fast!) but on the other, it felt wrong. He was the enemy and super controlling, she was doing her best to stay ignorant to that fact. There were so many things that could go wrong by pursuing this relationship, and working with the Resistance was one of them. If Hans found out or if she was caught by any German soldier, she’d be in real trouble. Was it all really worth it? Even though I had my doubts, I felt really involved in the story here and I was desperate for Louise and her family to stay safe. I loved how the author manages to pull you in for so long, keeping you curious and on edge. I loved reading about the Resistance and how they were working hard to bring Jews and airmen to safety. Louise eventually finds herself in murky waters after a night out goes wrong. Was she finally about to find herself in trouble? Would the Germans find out her secrets?
The end
With friends and family turning against her, Louise becomes frustrated and angry by the lack of support. But even so, I sided with all of them. She needed to get out of her relationship with Hans. But what came next surprised me; the kick she needed, seeing first hand exactly what these Nazi soldiers were capable of. I felt so thankful that all these different instances changed her mindset, and I felt I could finally breathe a little easier! With her mind made up, the hard task of staying alive and keeping those close to her safe became so much more real, so much more urgent. I had no idea how she was going to pull it off, and I began reading at a faster pace – I was desperate for the conclusion! I felt a sense of relief, yet a kind of terror due to the unpredictability of it all, and I just loved it. It felt so gripping at this point! The change in Louise’s character was so welcomed here too. She needed to put things right and I was confident she’d succeed. I was excited to hear about her plans!
“My mother’s suggestion of simply pleading for their release wasn’t going to work, I needed to be smarter than that. And I wasn’t going to be able to pull it off on my own, I realized. Tomorrow, I would start reaching out to the people I’d hurt. I needed my friends back.“
The ending chapters were so excellently plotted and created such a satisfying and memorable finale. My emotions were all over the place – I felt nervous, shocked and concerned as Louise’s clever plans unfolded, yet felt a sense of pride and relief when we learn of the results of these plans and each character’s fate. There are some really intense scenes that had me holding my breath, and at times, I was desperate for these scenes to be longer than they were, but I still thoroughly enjoyed them and how they made me feel. I loved how the author brings you into a moment so much that you forget about reality, and all that matters at that time are the characters and the scene. I was so so impressed and loved every moment of that ending. The final page also made my head spin! I feel so proud of this author and everything she’s achieved with Not My War – I’d definitely recommend for readers of YA and historical fiction. My first read from this author, but I’m certain it won’t be the last!
Overall thoughts
Not My War is such an eye-opening account of life in Paris during the Second World War. It’s told through the eyes of Louise, a girl who grows and matures over the years to eventually play an important role in aiding the French Resistance. The book is written in a captivating and easy to digest way, tugging your thoughts and emotions from one extreme to the next. Even though I didn’t agree with some of the decisions Louise made in her life, these decisions becomes crucial to saving lives in Nazi-occupied France, and it was completely fascinating. I didn’t want it to end! The story is raw, brutally honest and full of detail. A completely different read for me and I’d read it again in a heartbeat!
You can grab your own copy of Not My War over on Amazon now, available on Kindle or in paperback. Check out my author interview with Valerie Anne Hudson here!
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