I started working at the age of 14. Young, I know but I was determined to save the Money for school trips my parents couldn’t afford. Little did I know that I was entering the endless cycle of capitalism.

At one point I worked two jobs and went to high school, only to never pay for a single school trip.

Why did I work so hard?

Capitalism: An issue that no one talks about but inadvertently it is a system we are all a part of. It is fuelled by the mentality that we don’t have enough.

Will we ever have enough? But, what is enough?

Capitalism: It is a political and economical system with the plain aim to make a profit. It is based on individuals owning capital goods which vary in price according to supply and demand.

It was and still is the reason why there is such a big divide between people that have money and people that don’t. It is one of the reasons why some people have food on the table and why most people die of starvation. It is one of the reasons our happiness derives from others having less. Capitalism fuels greed.

I get it, it’s nice to have things. It’s nice to not have to worry about money, to hoard money, to only see our bank accounts increase. Even I get a dopamine hit when on payday. The week before I get paid, all I can think about is Thursday at 6m opening up my Bank Account apps and seeing how much I’ve earnt.

But we are forgetting, that statistics show that more than half of the world’s population are living on $10 a day.

With the cost of living only increasing, I know I spend way more than $10 a day. That’s without buying a meal out.

I hope this reassures more people about their finances. You’re doing better than approximately 4 billion people in the world right now. The question is, are you happier than more than 4 billion in the world because of it?

I love my Sleep, and for the longest time, I used it to avoid hard situations and tough feelings. Fighting with a loved one, I’d go and have a nap. Have an assignment due tomorrow, have a nap, you’ll feel better after. Wrong.

Little did I know, that the reason that I could sleep so easy was that I wasn't getting enough sleep in the first place. I spent three years of my life never tossing and turning before bed, having 20-minute naps always waking up groggy; waking up with 15 minutes to get ready for a 9-hour shift. At the time, the money was worth it, sleep wasn’t important. I partied every weekend to only use the weekdays to recover and then rinse and repeat. It was an endless cycle of my misconceptualised idea of rest. I never felt rested, but didn’t question it. Numbers mattered more.

I started questioning myself. Why was I working myself to the bone? Why did I push myself to go to the gym when I didn’t have to energy to?

I was scared of being unproductive.

I was influenced by intergenerational trauma and other types of pain that I was avoiding, but here we are. Well rested, 5.30 am starts and intentionally pick the days that I want to have a late night. Sleeping in whenever I feel the need, not condemning myself when I do. Listening to my body, you’d be surprised at how many issues could be solved by a night's rest. It’s not just s saying. We need to take our sleep more seriously.

If you have time, in your car, when you are doing chores, please listen to this podcast. It's on Spotify, Apple and youtube. Matthew Walker is a scientist and professor who specialises in sleep and speaks on some of the most eye-opening statistics about the healing wonders of sleep, something everyone should be taking more seriously, the length of your life depends on it. This podcast was the sole reason my relationship with rest is on its healing journey.

The power of intention.

I started questioning what I was working for. What do I want? Sure, a nice-looking bank account is pretty to look at but at the end of the day is my main goal just to have more money, to see numbers rise? What am I going to do with the money? What was I working so hard for? Was my whole life derived from capitalism?

If you don’t agree with me, fair I get it. The grind can feel good, and feeling productive is great. But I challenge you, take a day off for no reason, and spend that day doing what you want. Sleep in. Do your hobby. Go get a coffee with a book. Let me know how you feel the day after.