TV presenter Trisha Goddard, 63, went through the menopause while being treated for breast cancer.

When my doctor said: “You’re perimenopausal,” I replied: “What does that mean?”

I was 50, had just been diagnosed with breast cancer and had never even heard the word before. 

But when I Googled it, it made so much sense.

My periods had always been erratic, but over the previous two years, they’d become further apart and I’d been having mood swings.

I had off days, low moods and a feeling of “urgh”. I’d also been forgetful and struggled to concentrate.

I’ve worked in television for many years, and I never got nervous, but I’d been experiencing slight anxiety and I didn’t know why.

There was nothing I could put my finger on. It was like: “I don’t have anything to feel like this about?”

I’d also had a huge loss of libido, but at the time I thought it was because I didn’t fancy my then-husband [psychotherapist Peter Gianfrancesco, 60] any more.

My mum had died four years before on July 24, 2004, so I’d wondered if my symptoms were caused by grief.

I’d also had mental-health issues in the past and I thought: “Please tell me I’m not going into depression!” 

When I had another period after my first bout of chemotherapy, the doctors freaked out because my cancer was oestrogen-linked, and the idea was to kill off all oestrogen.

So they upped my dose of chemo and I basically went through the menopause in 48 hours – it normally takes three to five years, so it was like being thrown at a brick wall.

Everything was more severe because it was drug-induced, and I had horrific hot flushes.

My mindset was positive though, because it meant chemo was working and my life was being saved. They might not be nice, but it would have a positive outcome.

The fact my breast cancer was oestrogen-fuelled meant I couldn’t have HRT, but I found red-clover tea to be a godsend.

I discovered it in a tea shop in Norfolk halfway through my chemo treatment in 2008, when my make-up was running down my face and the woman behind the counter said: “You’re having a hot flush! Have you tried red-clover tea?”

Now I have it every evening.

The menopause meant I had to make other adjustments, too. My whole life I’ve worn nighties, but I don’t wear one any more.

The vaginal dryness I experienced caused soreness and chafing when I ran long distances, but I discovered non-hormonal, moisturising pessaries, which were a revelation. 

I divorced Peter in 2017. Our problems weren’t just about libido – they were about lack of connection and the whole thing, but my symptoms threw fuel on the fire.

If you understand the reasons for someone’s behaviour, you can support them, but if you don’t, then it’s a whole different take.

The menopause isn’t a feminist issue, it’s an education issue.

Men should know as much about it as women, because relationships suffer from women being told they’re “moody” or “frigid” or “no fun” when actually they’re going through the menopause.

Peter was supportive when I was having chemo, but neither of us even knew about the perimenopause. 

When schools teach children about the birds and the bees, I think they should teach them about the menopause, too.

As parents, we need to talk to our children about it. We should explain that it’s a natural part of life, so it’s not hush-hush. 

Mindset matters. I take the view that as we reach menopause, we become wise, influential, and strong. Rather than mourning, we should celebrate becoming leaders of women. 

• Listen to Trisha’s TalkRadio show Saturdays, 1-4pm. Follow Trisha on Instagram @therealtrishagoddard.