Hi beauts!
So yeah… my weight blogging has fallen by the wayside a little lately hasn’t it?

First of all, I don’t want to stop talking about my weight issues – no way. This blog has Helped me so much in getting to where I am today and I intend fully on it being my grounding place… but I’ve been onto something lately.

SELF LOVE

See… all I ever thought was there is only Beauty in attempting to carve your body into one that’s been visited by photoshop one too many a time… when in reality – why isn’t my body perfect? Why can I be happy in the skin I’m in?

More importantly why is some vapid, glossy, over analysed magazine image dictating to me that I’m the wrong thing in this world? I mean surely it isn’t – it’s showcasing probably some sandal I won’t ever be able to afford or some perfume with a stupid name – but we look at these images and for women and men with low self esteem we find some solace in mumbling ‘I want to look like that‘ setting goals that are hard to achieve – eating blades of grass and drinking dust in the quest for beauty. 
When really, it’s already staring you in the face. Beauty is everywhere – what may not be one persons envision of ‘beauty’ is another persons Mona Lisa – but surely it doesn’t give anyone the right to say it’s not beautiful because it doesn’t befit them? Move on. Find your beauty, search for what is beautiful for you and make that work. But let’s not demoralise and knock others who don’t adhere to your idealisms on the way down ok?

Without getting too deep – and not being the type of girl to overtly provoke (seriously it’s not in my nature, I’m so laid back I’m horizontal… in bed and eating too usually) I’ve had a full on week of reflection. 

I’ll put it this way – my week has been shockingly CRAP. my kids have been ill, the husband is on antibiotics, I myself have been ill and we have all endured a really cold week with zero heating in the house because the boiler broke!

Maybe the cold temperatures helped me see some sense…

Or maybe I’m hallucinating, aren’t those the same thing for me? Either way – I’m me. And I’ve been this way for ages. It’s me and I’m loved for being me so why don’t I just god damned embrace being me?!

Now I’m in no way a ‘skinny’ or ‘fat’ basher. I hate the way culture has pitted the two against each other – there shouldn’t be a divide at all in my opinion but moreso a show of respect, a unity that we’re all different – we are all unique and who we want to be, life is for living the way we want to and ‘you’ll go down some streets look them over with care, of some you may say I don’t choose to go there’

Now I wrote the Seuss quote from the top of my head – so I’m sorry if it’s a tad wrong. But it’s quite a poignant book, ‘oh the places you’ll go’ – a book about the highs and lows of life and the paths you choose.  Give it a read no one will ever judge. 

I keep going off on tangents, I apologise I’m merely writing from the heart and mind – but as you can see in my somewhat, messy, darkened pictures I’m not everyone’s ‘perfect’ and I won’t ever claim to be. But I’m my husbands perfect, I’m the beauty he liked and the rest is history. 

“I keep telling you I’ve always found you beautiful” 

He said to me this week as I mentioned a fashion campaign that had piqued my interest. Why didn’t I believe it? Why had I never listened to those words carefully as they fell from his lips? It’s something I had always neglected myself. This one compliment that had an easy way to move mountains in my head I had denied myself for over a decade

Sod it. It’s time to believe

I’m no diet queen. I’m no gym bunny – this is not to say I’m giving up. I want to be fit and I will continue with exercise and eating better for my health and children for sure. But I’m fed up and won’t take anymore of my self beating. It’s time I got real with myself and began thinking that way. 

One love – zero hate 

Yes I wobble, my curves own their own curves, I have a mommy hangover (moms apron) that could slap you silly, my thighs meet so bad in the middle they almost merge into one! Hehe and I have chubby upper arms. BUT ITS ME ITS ZARA.  I still laugh the same, smile the same, fall down in heels like a newborn giraffe the same…

So here’s on to my journey – and here’s to yours too, listen to your mind, body and soul and never ever let anyone dull your shine

You’re a diamond!

Ps. Kid, you’ll move mountains
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Ta rah a bit beautiful

Zara

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