The two of us set off out of the flat, down the street, and head towards the park. We walk across the junction and head down the street and across the Zebra crossing and we head up the tree-lined drive to the boating lake near the running track, which is where I know Alison wants to be. She loves the water and every time we've ambled around the park we always go by the route that takes us around the lake. Twice around the lake.

We come to a halt by the metals bars around the lake and we watch a short old Mediterranean man, a Greek or an Italian maybe, and he is taking out bread from his crumpled and well-used bag and feeding the ducks on the lake. The old man smiles and offers some dry white bread to Alison who smiles and gratefully takes it.

"I'll be like that. I'm sure of it. I'll feed the ducks on Saturday mornings, but maybe I won't be so tanned. I mean who knows," I say.
"No, you don't strike me like the tanned type what with your delicate pale white looks," she says laughing.
"Really? That doesn't sound so good. I'll be one of those translucent old people. Also known as TOPs."
"Old people aren't translucent, Gordie."
"Maybe I mean transparent?"
"No, I really don't think you do."

As we are looking across the old man offers us a smile and a gentle nod, but says nothing. Instead he turns with his hands folded behind his back and he walks off following the fence around the edge of the water.

After the old man has gone Alison tells me that the two of us are in the same boat now, which prompts me to take a few running jumping steps screaming as I go.

"What on earth are you doing?"
"I've just found out I'm pregnant and to be honest, that's pretty distressing. I thought screaming might help."
"Oh, you're very funny."
"You know, people do say that," I say.
"No they don't."
"Okay, but they do say, my sarcasm can be withering."
"Yes, but that isn't a good thing."
"Oh come on, you can't say that now. I built my whole thing around it."
"Oh too bad, anyway, I mean Susan."
"Susan? Now I'm confused. Susan's pregnant already? Adam is a fast worker, but that would be..."
"No you fool, I mean that we are both on our own."
"Oh, see what you mean, but I think I liked it more when you said she was pregnant."
"Oh, and why's that?"
"Oh, I don't know, the finality of it."
"Oh what you mean that if she was up the duff, like moi, you wouldn't have to do anything about it?"
"Something like that."
"Well she's not, so who knows."
"Anyway, less about me, lets talk about you and..."
"Me and my work fling? My seedy and reckless work fling. Okay. What do you want to know?"
"Paul will be back right? I mean he is absolutely crazy about you."
"I don't think so. I think I broke his heart. Anyway, you seem to be under the impression that I want him back."
"And you don't?"
"No," she says shaking her head.
"Wow, you're just huge with the news today."
"Wow indeed, you're so funny."
"I know, but this is an important day. I never knew we were old enough to have 'affairs', previously it was just screwing around, but you're married and have had affair with...well full blow results."
"Full blown? Oh thanks."
"Sorry, with serious results. Its like we moved to a new level. Affairs, its big."
"We've moved?"
"Definitely, I think we're together in this."
"Sweet."
"Possibly, so come on what about affair guy?"
"Oh I don't really want him either."
"You're one picky girl, you know that right?"
"I've always been picky."
"True, but now you don't want the husband, who technically you should want what with the marriage, and you don't want the affair guy who you should want as you don't want the husband...and, oh I'm confused here. So why don't you want him."
"I don' t know, he was, what was he? He was...oh I don't know he was just there, and I wanted someone who was there."
"That's' the trouble with people isn't it? They're either there or they're not."
"Oh that's very profound Gordie, in your case they happen to be elsewhere."
"Yeah, in my case that's probably true. You know, I have to tell you Ali, the whole seedy work thing? I never saw that coming."
"It wasn't exactly planned."
"Your seedy work girl. Nice."
"Oh thanks, anyway, I seem to remember you having one or two work things."
"True, but I was young, not married and errr stupid."
"True, but at least you're still stupid."
"There will always be that. So what did you want with affair guy?"
"Oh I think I just wanted a way out and then I found one and...I don't know, heavens knows, I'm miserably now."
"The Smiths are banned, really they should be. Besides you weren't looking for a way out."
"I wasn't? I thought I was."
"No, you were looking for an easy way out."
"Harsh, but possibly true."
"I find it really hard to grasp. I mean you two, Alison and Paul, were rocks, rocks talked about you. You were big in the rock world."
"A rock? Oh come on."
"Seriously, you're meant to be unassailable that's your job."

Alison at looks back at me for a moment and she looks a little put off.

"What do you mean unassailable?"

I start to explain to her that everyone has a friend who is unassailable. The needle in the eye of the storm the people who don't start going to pieces when all around them do.

"You're the rock steady one," I tell her, "keeping up a tradition of giving out wise and good advice to all your friends."

Alison shakes her head.

"That's how you see me?" she asks.
"Absolutely."
"Now that is funny."
"It isn't meant to be. I just always thought that you and Paul were beyond those kinds of jitters, which hit everyone else."
"I'm not unassailable though," Alison starts again.
"What do you mean?"

I ask her and as I do Alison turns her lip up as if she were considering telling something else, but is undecided.

"I'm just not I'm...." she shrugs, stops.
"Maybe you shouldn't tell me."
"Why because I'm unassailable?"
"Precisely."
"And who am I meant to turn to?"
"To you close friends," I say and I'm smiling as I do.
"Which would be you then, wouldn't it?"
"Is there anyone closer? There should be what with me being kind of foolish and short on good advice."
"And you say I'm funny,"
"Maybe we lost our unassailable powers when we got married and tried to grow up. I think it's about then that you start to stop playing and take it seriously. Well one of us did at least," she says.

I'm about to speak and I don't know what I am going to say and instead I end up silently dropping my jaw.

"It's okay," Alison says, "I don't know what to say either."

Alison turns to lean on the thick black railings and as she does she hands me the slice of dry white bread that the old man had given to her.

"Come on," she says, "feed the ducks for me."