I had dinner last night with a good friend who's a forensic psychologist. We were talking about psychopaths (as you do) and got onto Tony Soprano. I've only watched a couple of episodes of The Sopranos, but think I might have to have another look.

It's claimed one of the common characteristics of psychopaths is their lack of empathy and remorse. Some also say they don't experience shame. My friend and I wondered about that. We've both worked in the prison system and came across many people who could be considered psychopathic, but have quite a significant emotional life. Their emotions are chaotic, and fall into that general anti social personality disorder range, but the main thing they had in common with other people was their ability to feel shame. It's their reaction to it that sets them apart.

When most people feel shame, it's unpleasant. Maybe they've done something to hurt someone and they feel ashamed. Generally their reaction would be to feel guilt and then remorse and mostly want to make it up to the person they've hurt. They may not act on those feelings but they do feel them.

The people I worked with in the prison system felt shame if they did something hurtful to another person, but their immediate reaction was to fall into rage. They blamed that other person for their unpleasant feeling and wanted to punish or destroy them. They didn't feel guilt or remorse and certainly didn't feel the need to make reparation to the other person.

We've all come across people like that in our lives. They may not be criminals, but they have a tendency to blame others and want to punish them for making them feel ashamed for their own bad behavior. It's the reasoning behind the violent man blaming his wife or girlfriend for his violence. She bought it on herself for making him feel ashamed.

Why am I writing about this? It's good to have well rounded characters in your work, including villains. A cardboard cut out psychopath is less interesting than a psychopath who loves his mother and is fiercely protective of his family. His bad behavior is all the more shocking if we can see him as someone having complex emotional reactions that make him sympathetic.