It's been a long while, hasn't it? Not just since I blogged here. But since I've felt like I had something to say.

Don't be fooled, I may not have anything to say all. I am inspired by my friend who picked it up and the title of his blog is just the damndestd of truths.

Right now, I'm writing this on my phone while Caleb falls asleep on me. His face is smashed up in my neck and he's breatybre slow but it could be too soon to try to sneak away. I have to play this out, Indiana Jones style.

Maybe I am just delaying myself because even though I haven't slept properly in years I do enjoy the cuddle time. He's got me wrapped around his pinky, it's terrible.

I would describe myself as a parent the same I would as a regular person. Yeilding. Impressionable. Relaxed. And still trying to see where exactly I fit into all of this life. Into anything.

I was worried about getting too poetic. People I know might read this and think uh oh.

Or they might think nothing at all. I shouldn't care too much about it. I want to do this again. Just in a different way. We can get into this bit another time. Not ready to scars you off yet.

Like, today was a bit of a write off. I made a big breakfast and a peach cobbler for dinner, watched a movie, did 80% of the laundry and watched the boy ride his trike around. Poor Brian was bored to death. We wanted to go for a hike or something but we'd be peeling ourselves off of the pavement. Maybe in a few years time when Caleb is older we can go to a cottage and be one with the breeze and trees.

If I don't get up now and leave I will fall asleep in the kiss tiny toddler bed. And now one will let the cat in

And she'll bring us more.... presents. We don't need more of gifts.