how does one live a life among the rubble, the bombing, seeing friends cut and bleeding, hugging family members to comfort them, searching for food when little remains? how does one stay warm in winter while digging graves or just looking through blown out windows on a landscape turned from verdant to devastated and not grow bitter with the lack of help and the inhumanity of people being sadistic, the constant fear for loved ones? how does one keep belief in hope or god or peace of life itself when walls blow apart with sounds that come and come back again?