I’m reading “This Is the Voice” by John Colapinto now.
As is often the case with great nonfiction, there are too many interesting ideas in this book. It’s not possible to cover them all on Sponge, because then it will be “The Mirror and the Palette” all over again, or even more extreme... I’d be doing 20 episodes on “This Is the Voice,” alone.
So, to prevent that, here’s an interesting topic that I don’t think I’ll get to cover in Sponge.
... the human voice is unique, in the animal kingdom, not only in its specialization for speech, but for its sexual dimorphism—the way it splits along gender lines. All other mammals are vocally monomorphic: their roars, barks, meows, and baahs sound the same whether made by a Male or a female of the species. Even our closest primate kin, chimpanzees and bonobos, display less sexual dimorphism of voice than we do—only a few semitones difference. Human males speak at a pitch that is, on average, a full octave below women, twelve semitones, a big difference.
There’s a whole lot of talk about sexy, low man voice in this chapter.
Basically, the idea is that woman are attracted to low male voice... because it’s sexy... and during parts of the ovulation cycle... it sounds even sexier...
BUT THEN, also: human women have learned to select mates who don’t boast their low sexy man voice too much. The idea is that, if a man is too sexual, he isn’t ideal as a long-term partner. He’ll go mate with some other lady. 😂 And...
This is likely how our species has ended up with male voices significantly lower than that of females, but nowhere near the rumbling growl of gorillas. With their evolved attraction to voices that are low (but not too low), women have dialed-up the average pitch of the male voice from that of our primate ancestors, even at the cost of a slightly weaker immune system in their offspring.
And so, while human males may use extra-low voices around males as a territory signal of sorts, they usually know not to act too macho toward their women (or to people to whom they don’t want to behave in a caveman-like manner)... unless they come from a culture where over-machoism, including the kind uttered through voice, is seen as sexy.
In some other cultures, the over-low macho voice is interpreted as being so offputting that people who use that voice get sued more.
Kinda scary, isn’t it? I mean, if you did the whole caveman bit, then maybe you deserve to get sued. But what if your voice is naturally extra-low, and there’s no way to make it any higher? Is it worth it for men with naturally extra-low voices to adopt fake-high voices? Would that fakeness turn off people equally? (There was no answer to this in the book. But I wonder.) Maybe, even if it does turn off people, it will decrease your likelihood of getting sued?
Anyway, what I really wanted to mention in this post was this:
Darwin cited gibbons as a living example of how certain ape species use vocal melodies, in a complex duet, for courtship. If gibbons are any guide, the melodic elasticity of the voice is a big romantic draw—especially its ability to soar into the upper registers, in clear high notes that (in males) indicate that the vocalizer is not only a fierce warrior, but also a sensitive, nurturing, romantic soul.
I find this quote so amusing. 🤣 Show your lady that you’re “not only a fierce warrior, but also a sensitive, nurturing, romantic soul.” Sing “into the upper registers, in clear high notes”!
Being like the gentleman gibbons is the way to go if you want ladies, because it’s not just the gibbons who do this: Jimi Hendrix is mentioned as an example of the “explicit connection between male music making and sexual success,” due to his ability to sing and play the guitar. Led Zeppelin singer Robert Plant is also mentioned. Him, and his many, many groupies!
Summary:
If you’re a heterosexual male who wants to appeal to heterosexual females, the examples in this book suggest that you should...:
- ...have a low voice.
- But not too low. Keep the extra-low voice for your hangouts with the boys, if you’re in North America/Western Europe. It’s likely that ladies there will find extra-low macho voices patently unsexy. I’m not sure about other cultures. Ask your girl what kind of voice she finds sexy. 🤷♀️
- Learn to sing high notes.
- Seranade your lady.
- Failing at all of the above, learn to play the guitar. Or some other instrument that can emit that sexy low-range to high-range sound.
This, gentlemen, is apparently the roadmap to romantic success. (Disclaimer: I cannot vouch for its efficacy, because I haven’t ever been a heterosexual male who wanted to appeal to heterosexual females.🍻 )
#reading
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