Parenthood is a challenge where navigating the twists and turns of raising a child in this turbulent world can feel overwhelming. Especially when moms and dads know they play an enormous role in molding their kids' personalities and emotional and mental health, for better or worse. And while there is no such thing as a perfect Parent, most try their best to lift their little ones and give them support whenever they need it.

However, a few are downright toxic and take delight in imposing hurt, pain, and ignorance onto their child. So when Redditor odeus120 reached out to 'Ask Reddit' with a question, "What screams trashy parents?", it inspired people to share their takes online. Suddenly, the thread turned into an illuminating read about how people can tell if their behavior patterns negatively shape their child's life.

Below, you'll find a list of these thought-provoking responses about actions parents should steer clear of. So continue scrolling and upvote the ones you agree with. Keep reading to also find an interview with the person who sparked this conversation, odeus120. Then be sure to let us know what other signs of harmful parenting you've ever witnessed in the comment section below.

#1

Social media influencers whose entire content is their children. People who publically punish their kids online, parents who give out way to many details about their children giving them lack of privacy. Child exploitation at its finest.

Image credits: Rooster-Wild

#2

Kids running around a store trashing the place and not a parent in sight.

Image credits: makeski25

#3

Having so many that you can't properly care for them all, or having the older kids care for the younger ones most of the time.

Image credits: Express_Topic_4081

We managed to get in touch with the person who sparked the conversation on the platform, Redditor odeus120, who was kind enough to chat about the thread and the reasons it resonated so deeply with the community. They told Bored Panda that the idea to raise this question came after they stumbled upon a YouTube video of an 'Ask Reddit' post on a similar topic. "So naturally, I made a post on the same theme," odeus120 said.

However, the user was surprised to see the thread blow up as much as it did. "I was expecting it to follow the same as most of my posts," the user added. "I was shocked by the responses and so many replies that I have not read them all. I was also shocked because this was the first post of mine to get over 5.7k upvotes and 5.3k comments."

#4

Changing your kids diaper in a Walmart parking lot and throwing the diaper full of s**t on the ground for someone else to deal with.

Image credits: Kreema29

#5

Mothers who sees their daughter as competition

Image credits: Salt-Direction4885

#6

Force them into beauty pageants as toddlers

Image credits: WuffGang

After reading the reactions and opinions shared by fellow community members, the user guessed that this thread resonated with so many people because "there are sadly so many helicopter, redneck, and [bad] parents out there." The user also mentioned that in their opinion, these behaviors mentioned in the list are the results of harmful relationships people had with their own parents, "So naturally, they continue to abuse their own kids."

#7

Kids destroying other people's stuff/property and the parents are just standing there and laughing like it's a form of amusement. Once went into a older movie store and there was a child bashing the glass with his ball and throwing the movies all over the floors. The mother (presumedly) let her child continue to do that despite others' protests including the manager's. I don't fault the child, doesn't know any better. The mother should've been asked to leave the store with her son.

Image credits: InfiniteWords117

#8

When I waited tables in college, I saw a mother fill her young toddler’s bottle with Coca-cola. I thought it was just horrible.

Image credits: lobsters_love_butter

#9

I lost count of how many parent conferences I had that went like this:

Me: You child’s grades and behavior are horrible.

Them: I don’t know what to do! I’ve tried everything!

Me: Like what?

Them: I took their PS5 away, and their XBOX360, but then they went crazy, so I gave it back to them.

Me: So you tried like nothing?

Image credits: Edward_the_Dog

It’s no secret that poor parenting feels heavy and confusing as it can have a long-term impact on how a child sees themselves and the world. After all, kids have a tendency to soak up everything adults say or do like sponges. Whether parents consistently criticize their little ones, control every aspect of their lives, use guilt to manipulate their children, or are emotionally and physically abusive, they can do a lot of harm to their children’s lives.

Of course, we're not here to vilify all parents. The reality is that moms and dads can make mistakes, whether intentionally or not. But when they constantly pass on the same harmful behaviors to their kids, it can lead to a traumatic childhood.

As stated in an article on Healthline, there’s no such medical term as a "toxic parent". Since every family is different, there’s no clear definition of what behavior patterns clearly define this concept. However, it’s usually used to describe individuals who behave in ways that cause fear, guilt, or obligation in their children. "A toxic parent, however, is more concerned with their own needs than whether what they’re doing is harmful or damaging. They likely won’t apologize or even admit that what they are doing is wrong. And the abuse or neglect tends to be ongoing or progressive."

#10

Smoking in the car with the kids in the back.

Image credits: 2leewhohot

#11

Parents emotionally blackmailing their kids. Using guilt and obligation to control their children.

Image credits: SuvenPan

#12

When their kids could literally set the world on fire and they'll blame anyone else to avoid responsibility.

Image credits: Difficult_Shine3675

Psychologist Chivonna Childs, Ph.D., explained to Cleveland Clinic that toxic parents are more self-centered than other-centered. "Any time you think a person is toxic, you look at their behavior. Those traits can belong to our parents as well," she added. "Those are signs of toxic people. Our parents are individuals, they’re people. They just happen to be our parents."

When it comes to harmful parenting patterns and the effects they have on a child, the biggest one is the constant feeling of being trapped. "Whether it’s physical, verbal or emotional abuse, you feel trapped if you’re a child," Dr. Childs says. "It’s not like a child can just get up and leave, to go live on his or her own. You’re left at the mercy of the people who love and take care of us."

#13

Watching YouTube videos on their phone at full volume without headphones while in a public place

Image credits: ColtenLance

#14

Posting videos of your child having a meltdown while you mock them.

#15

I know not everyone will agree with me on this, but parents buying their kid's vapes and other things at a young age.

Moreover, toxic parenting impacts future relationships. Because parents are children's introduction to the world, Dr. Childs explained kids deem their behaviors to be completely normal until they’re 5 or 6 years old. Unfortunately, once they realize the impact of these actions, the damage has already been done. "These are learned behaviors that we can continue to perpetuate on others as well as our own children," she said. "If you’re raised thinking that toxic behavior is normal, then you’ll think that’s how you’re supposed to behave with your children, too."

"If we don’t understand how to treat people and how to be in reciprocal relationships where there’s a give and take, then it can spread beyond your family, too."

#16

There is a kid (maybe 8-10 years old) on the other side of my street right now yelling slurs and telling everyone who walks by to go f**k themselves while their parent sits on the porch smoking weed and laughing. This is a regular occurrence. I'm fairly certain the kid has a mental disorder but the fact that the parent seems to be encouraging the behavior is pretty trashy.

Image credits: SternCoats

#17

Too many pets. Like...way too many to the point where they don't really take care of them.

Image credits: MintyPastures

#18

Making your kids take care of their siblings instead of them having a life.

Image credits: hopefulleo2112

Growing up with toxic parents is a difficult situation to be in. Children may feel neglected or that they can never do anything right, which in turn alters their sense of self-esteem and safety at home. It can even lead to dire consequences for their physical and mental health. If you recognize some of these toxic traits in your parents, thankfully, there are ways to cope with these behaviors.

It's helpful to focus on yourself and find supportive people who can help you move past these negative patterns and make your way forward. In more extreme cases, however, seeking professional help is important as it can guide you to better understand and process your emotions.

#19

Maybe an unpopular opinion, but ear piercings on kids just past the newborn stage.

#20

Kids that smell like smoke because their parents smoke indoors.

It was my parents. Everybody hated when we came over because everything we'd touch would smell like cigarettes as well. Couldn't convince my parents to smoke outside of the home because "it's their house and they'll do as they please".

Image credits: bumblingbirdy

#21

Alowing your children to become obese, its child abuse, simple as that. No reason a 12 year old should be 180lbs.

Image credits: aup123

Setting healthy boundaries also helps us set clear expectations and limits of how others can treat us. "Parents don’t suddenly change and become nontoxic. You may have to distance yourself from them to heal and that can be a hard pill to swallow," Dr. Childs noted.

It may feel uncomfortable to create this emotional and physical space between you and your parents, but the psychologist explained this is precisely what you would do with any other toxic person in your life. "We have to let them know what’s appropriate and what’s not because boundaries will help you heal."

#22

Babies in the background of twerking videos. It's just weird.

Image credits: Nillabeans

#23

Parents that seem disinterested in their kids. They don't even necessarily have to be neglected (though they usually are). I just find it strange when I see kids very obviously trying to reach out to their parents or creating a bit of a scene in public and the parents are just like, "yeah, whatever" and go back on their phones.

Image credits: chipsails

#24

Refusing to believe their kid can do wrong

Image credits: rippedradiator

"Parents are the most difficult boundaries because they gave birth to you, they know what buttons to push," she pointed out that setting limits with family members can seem almost impossible.

If that's the case, trying to talk to a trusted friend can help give you the necessary emotional support and motivation to stick to your new boundaries. "They will become upset but that means it’s working. If they can’t respect those boundaries, we have to love them from a distance. That allows us to be free from their toxicity," Dr. Childs concluded.

#25

When the kids are sick and contagious, but the parent(s) want a night out, and don't tell their childcare provider their kids are sick.

Image credits: holdingpotato

#26

Young children whose teeth are already black and rotting from lack of care.

Children in dirty/smelly clothes - not from a child playing outside as kids do, but legitimately filthy, unwashed, clothes.

Kids running wild in public with no attempts to reign them in.

Image credits: WrongRedditKronk

#27

Having a favorite child

Image credits: Available_Dress1405

#28

When I see a 5 year old in nothing but a diaper, and a pacifier to shut them up.

I’m not saying those are always indications of it. But when I show up to babysitting job. And there’s a clearly-to-old for a diaper kiddo greeting me. I’m probably going to meet some trashy parents

Image credits: anon

#29

Cussing out their school-age kids, especially out in public.

#30

Babies with pierced ears

Image credits: metzgermeister87