2024-04-28 20:08
Most of the people at my work aren't at my work any more. We're
working remotely during the Great Pandemic of 2020, so this story takes place "at
work," but work is my living room.My work is… Read More
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Mostly Words Blog
itsdougholland.com
It's personal. I write about whatever interests me — classic movies, bad neighbors, my cat, my gout, etc. It's very random.
2024-04-28 02:01
"When I was young, I didn't know what I wanted to do."Is that a quote from someone wise? Absolutely. It's a snippet of conversation overheard, from the guy stocking Bisquick at Grocery Outle… Read More
2024-04-27 16:50
Like
a lot of cheap apartment buildings, this place has thin walls. Often
I hear my neighbors. Drywall and hollow space is the only separation between units.
One night a while back, I wok… Read More
2024-04-26 15:33
Furries: An Inside Look (2010)Streaming free at VimeoUnsurprisingly, Republicans and other people who are afraid of EVERYTHING are afraid of furries — folks who dress up as animals. Th… Read More
2024-04-25 20:41
We
were eating at Stephanie's favorite Italian restaurant — window
table, best seat in the house. Steph was seated facing outside, so
other than my face, her view must've been pictu… Read More
2024-04-25 07:08
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#418 [archive]APR. 25, 2024New Orleans judge In priestly rape case demands paper trail from Catholic archbishop all the way to the Vatican &nb&hell…Read More
2024-04-24 19:44
by Paul ModicWhat matters more in life than sex or deathhow much will you get before your last breathYes the orgasm is the height of sensationthen you feel how life's a vacationDo these word… Read More
2024-04-24 19:40
Full Fathom Five (1952)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#281 [archive]APR. 24, 2024Rub-a-dub-dub, it's men in a tub. This is all about US military submarines… Read More
2024-04-23 21:00
To
break the boredom of perpetual lockdown, I walk around the neighborhood
once daily, unless it snows. I'm not adventurous; it's the same walk every time: six blocks north, one block west… Read More
2024-04-22 18:37
The Front Page (1931)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveThis is based on the play by Ben Hecht and Charles MacArthur, the same source material that became His Girl Friday nine years later. Th… Read More
2024-04-22 03:46
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#417 [archive]APR. 21, 2024A great silence is spreading over the natural world even as the sound of man is becoming deafening Study suggests young me… Read More
2024-04-21 16:52
This was originally several separate posts, which I've whittled down and sewn together into one long entry. It's too many words, sorry, but I love my cat and couldn't shut up. March 22, 2020… Read More
2024-04-20 20:20
The Fugitive (1963-67)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveThe 1993 movie with Harrison Ford, The Fugitive, was fun and it's on my rewatch list, but it wasn't as complex, thoughtful, or just pl… Read More
2024-04-19 23:58
The Frightening (2002)A new kid in a new town goes to his first day at Hallows End High School, where there's been a murder, but the principal won't cancel classes even for a day. A teacher… Read More
2024-04-19 21:00
There are many things I'd do different, smarter, if I
could do it all again. There are jobs I should have quit sooner, people I
lost contact with, a few people I should've contacted with a… Read More
2024-04-19 04:20
Again as most days, I remain horizontal in the recliner, sometimes searching the internet for employment, but only for a short while before frustration and boredom pull me back to watching o… Read More
2024-04-18 13:55
We were in our early 20s, me and a friend who'd become a flatmate, and one memorable night we stood on our apartment's balcony, and looked at the freeway
traffic in the distance.What we saw… Read More
2024-04-18 04:42
Freewheelin' (1976)Streaming free at TubiI wonder sometimes what I missed, beyond sprained ankles, from never
learning to skateboard. This is a mellow mostly-documentary about skateboarding… Read More
2024-04-17 04:35
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#416 [archive]APR. 16, 202420 years later, Abu Ghraib detainees get their day in US court
When they're done prosecuting Donald Trump fo… Read More
2024-04-16 18:17
The
doorbell rang, which meant my delivery of groceries was here. Nobody rings my doorbell except professionally.I slipped a mask over
my face, and stepped out onto the porch, where the de… Read More
2024-04-16 06:51
Frank Film (1973)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#277 [archive]APR. 15, 2024Filmmaker Frank Mouris explains what you're seeing as images are flashed on the sc… Read More
2024-04-14 22:13
Four Lions (2010)Streaming free at Tubi"Do you have any Islamic arguments, brother? I only listen to Islamic arguments."This is a ballsy satire, hyping all the stereotypes of Muslim radicals… Read More
2024-04-14 16:19
Procrastination is my only achievement in life, where "one of these days" I'll send a short story to The New Yorker, and "one of these days" I'll take out the trash, which is currently stack… Read More
2024-04-14 01:21
George Washington Carver is best known as the inventor of peanut butter. And I love peanut butter. There are always two jars on my shelf, ensuring I never run out, but it seems a fairly obvi… Read More
2024-04-13 02:38
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#415 [archive]APR. 12, 2024The non-profit States Newsroom now has a full-time presence in all fifty states States Newsroom first impres… Read More
2024-04-13 02:37
Foul Play (1978)Streaming free at Internet Archive A recently-divorced librarian (Goldie Hawn) picks up a hitchhiker, which unwittingly brings her into an assassination plot involving a… Read More
2024-04-11 18:56
An
old acquaintance reached out to me recently, and I'm fairly well hidden so
that took some work and some luck.Maybe it's a thing these days, that
when people get older they reach into t… Read More
2024-04-11 00:57
Force of Evil (1948)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveJoe Morse (John Garfield) is the lawyer for some gangster-guy who's in the numbers racket. Joe's brother Leo (Thomas Gomez) is in the nu… Read More
2024-04-10 20:24
"You can stay as long as you pay," she said."Daily, weekly, monthly." I grew up in Seattle, but I'd had enough of living the expected life. My girlfriend had dumped me, and I hated my job. I… Read More
2024-04-09 21:46
A fat white schmuck walks to the dumpster, on a gray
morning as winter approaches. You wouldn't notice me if you
saw me, but if you did you'd assume I'm grumpy.Everyone assumes it. Grumpy… Read More
2024-04-09 04:23
A Fool There Was (1915)Streaming free at Tubi NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#273 [archive]APR. 8, 2024She was a scamp, a camp, and a bit of a tramp, she was a V*A*M*P — vamp! This… Read More
2024-04-08 17:11
You know the cliché about taking the road less traveled? It's said so often it sounds stupid or pretentious, and usually said by people who don't mean it.It's from a great poem, thoug… Read More
2024-04-08 15:05
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#414 [archive]APR. 7, 2024 Life and the news make me more and more cynical, so let's open with some sour thoughts. For… Read More
2024-04-07 17:00
When we were kids, my brother and I were closer than most friends, and I've never had many friends so that meant a lot to me. We went to ball games, we joked around, skipped church together… Read More
2024-04-06 21:22
The Fly (1958)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveIt starts with bloody murder — Mrs Delambre has killed her husband, squished him in a hydraulic press to make sure that he's dead. It's… Read More
2024-04-06 17:42
The email to all employees was very upbeat, and used a week's worth of exclamation points: "Our newly-remodeled
snack-room is now open! Stop by on your break!" It ended with: "A vendor rep… Read More
2024-04-06 01:51
Numerous bus routes begin or end at the Burien Transit Center (BTC), and often I step off one bus there and onto another. It's my transfer point to go downtown, or to the diner, or to visit… Read More
2024-04-05 21:11
It was a crap like any other crap. Two small pieces, and
one longer but not extraordinary piece. I rinsed my butt with the
bidet, flushed, and walked away. Can't remember whether I washed… Read More
2024-04-04 22:49
Flesh Gordon (1974)Streaming free at Internet Archive I don't usually cover the porno beat, but this is something special. It opens with a long and sincere dedication to the creators of… Read More
2024-04-04 19:22
What follows is the whole story, in excruciating detail nobody asked for. It was cathartic to write it, and I hope someone somewhere finds it helpful.For those who'd rather avoid all the bed… Read More
2024-04-04 03:48
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#413 [archive]APR. 3, 2024Los Angeles spent $1.73m on anti-homeless signs I'm unable to find an obscenity that's obscene enough. A… Read More
2024-04-02 18:29
The Flame of New Orleans (1941)Streaming free at Internet Archive Marlene Dietrich plays a haughty Russian immigrant to America named Countess Claire Ledoux, and she's snagged a wealthy bank… Read More
2024-04-02 02:36
Often I've told you how and why I hate my flatmate Dean, but you must be as weary of reading about him as I'm weary of writing about him. No stories of Dean today (though there's a whopper i… Read More
2024-04-01 19:16
The Five Deadly Venoms (1975)a/k/a The Five VenomsStreaming free at YouTube The Venom martial arts school has had only five students, and each has renamed himself after a venomous reptile &m&hell…Read More
2024-03-30 19:40
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#412 [archive]MAR. 30, 2024 Finally, Joe Lieberman has done something to help Americans who aren't rich!♦ ♦ ♦ Aft… Read More
2024-03-30 06:46
F.I.S.T. (1978)Johnny Kovak (Sylvester Stallone) is a feisty warehouse worker, and his workplace is hell, with a boss who demands unpaid labor, and subtracts any accidental breakage from emp… Read More
2024-03-29 21:05
Without warning, I needed to use the toilet. It's one of the symptoms of being old — two or three days might go by without a poop, but when it announces itself, it cannot be ignored.Un… Read More
2024-03-28 00:35
First Man into Space (1958)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#267 [archive]MAR. 27, 2024Sci-fi flicks from the '50s are cool. Atomic energy and weaponry was new… Read More
2024-03-27 03:15
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#411 [archive]MAR. 26, 2024 When you were a kid maybe you believed in Santa, but most children figure out that lie by the time they're t… Read More
2024-03-26 11:48
Figures in a Landscape (1970)Streaming free at YouTubeMac and Ansell (Robert Shaw, Malcolm MacDowell) are running on a beach, then through a forest. Their hands are tied behind their backs… Read More
2024-03-25 18:30
My flatmate Dean eats a lot of ice cream. Seriously, a lot. We share a fridge, and his half of the freezer is crammed with six to eight half-gallon containers of ice cream, always the same b… Read More
2024-03-24 04:11
NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#265 [archive]MAR. 23, 2024Writing is the only thing that makes me feel human, and the last thing left in life that I enjoy. So I ought to be writing something… Read More
2024-03-22 21:21
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#410 [archive]MAR. 22, 2024Ruth Bader Ginsburg award ceremony canceled after fallout over honorees
I've always thought highly of Ruth… Read More
2024-03-21 23:31
The Fantasist (1986)Streaming free at TubiNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#264 [archive]MAR. 21, 2024From Robin Hardy, the director of the classic Wicker Man, this is a thriller that has it wa… Read More
2024-03-21 00:55
I've known a lot of nuts in my life. What's the polite term? "Mentally ill"? "Emotionally disturbed"? "Has issues"? Nah, nuts. That's the catch-all word for malfunctions between the ears. Yo… Read More
2024-03-20 04:22
The Face Behind the Mask (1941)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#263 [archive]MAR. 19, 2024This opens as an amiable light comedy, with Peter Lorre as a new imm… Read More
2024-03-19 00:39
Eve's Bayou (1997)NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#262 [archive]MAR. 18, 2024This is heavy drama like a soap opera, focused on one black family in 1950s Louisiana. Samuel L Jackson is cheatin… Read More
2024-03-18 17:57
Riding the bus back from breakfast on Saturday, a man stepped aboard carrying two black garbage bags, and talking loudly, but I couldn't make out a word.Another head case, obviously. The pri… Read More
2024-03-17 19:13
Entr'acte (1924)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveWas this the birth of avant garde cinema? Probably not, but it's the first film directed by René Clair, it's 22 minutes, and it's rem… Read More
2024-03-16 06:38
There's a lot going on in the news, very little of it good. That's the way it always is, but you and I and everyone knows it's gotten worse. Not as bad as it's going to get, though. CRANKYOL… Read More
2024-03-14 07:47
Elephant (1989)Streaming free at YouTube"For some of us, 'the troubles' is the elephant in our living room."Welcome to Northern Ireland: Some guy walks into a rec center, spots a janitor cle… Read More
2024-03-13 16:35
by EelI was going to be up in the Seattle area and wondered what it would be like to meet Doug Holland, who chronicles his daily life with a blog (Diary Of A Fat Slob), a recliner, and his n… Read More
2024-03-13 03:57
Eaux d'Artifice (1953)Streaming free at Internet ArchiveNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#259 [archive]MAR. 12, 2024This is from well-respected avant-garde arteest Kenneth Anger. His Puce Momen… Read More
2024-03-12 19:20
My
dad's mantra was, "If you're going to do something, do it right." Well,
that was one of his mantras. Dad had a thousand inspiration clichés,
but that was the one that stuck with… Read More
2024-03-12 03:51
Drive In (1976)Streaming free at YouTubeNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#258 [archive]MAR. 11, 2024A couple of good old boy weed dealers have a notion to move into more serious crime, by holdi… Read More
2024-03-11 07:21
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#408 [archive]MAR. 11, 2024America's last newspaperends print edition Well, that sucks. I almost can't remember a tim… Read More
2024-03-11 04:09
Dr. Terror's House of Horrors (1964)The title is a lie: There is no house. This is set on a train (which is way better than a house anyway), where several strangers share two benches facing… Read More
2024-03-10 17:32
It's early summer, 2020. The
phone rings. My grocery delivery is here, so I put on pants, roll my granny-cart to the porch, then spot a woman who spots me, and I push the cart toward her.Ke… Read More
2024-03-09 22:28
Do the Right Thing (1989)NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#256 [archive]MAR. 9, 2024Written, produced, directed by, and starring Spike Lee, this is the movie that made his reputation. He's done… Read More
2024-03-09 01:17
The Decline of Western Civilization (1981)Streaming free at Internet Archive NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#255 [archive]MAR. 8, 2024When punk hit America, I read the zines and loved the att… Read More
2024-03-07 20:39
Dazed and Confused (1993)NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#254 [archive]MAR. 7, 2024This is set in the '70s, as was my childhood, and
everything about the film looks authentic. It sounds very… Read More
2024-03-06 22:05
A year ago, almost to the day, I was hired at Haugen & Dahl. It's a sucky insurance company, and I quit a few months later. I've blown through some other jobs since then, and at pre… Read More
2024-03-06 05:09
NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#253 [archive]MAR. 5, 2024The Darjeeling Limited (2007)This is a Wes Anderson movie, and most of the story is set on a train rolling across India. I like Anders… Read More
2024-03-05 15:12
Crime Without Passion (1934)This starts with an amazing opening for 1934, as three "sisters of Evil" rise up from Hades, flying like bats, intercut with imagery of murders. I briefly wondere… Read More
2024-03-03 22:35
Cosmos (1980)Streaming free at Internet Archive "How did the universe arise? What was around before that?"Here's the answer to that question, and other things you've wondered about while hig… Read More
2024-03-02 19:22
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#407 [archive]MAR. 2, 2024Earth just experienced its hottest 12 months in recorded history You'll be seeing headlines like this more and… Read More
2024-03-02 10:30
Cocaine: One Man's Seduction (1983)This is a TV movie about cocaine, secretly underwritten by the DEA, I'm sure.Times are tough for Eddie Gant (Dennis Weaver), a California real estate agent… Read More
2024-03-02 00:51
By the disappointing standards of post-wife life, I'm a fairly happy guy. There's no higher state of humanity than doing something nice for someone you love, and knowing she'd soon do someth… Read More
2024-02-29 23:26
Children of Men (2007)Set in the near future, there are no children in this movie, because an unspecified but perfectly plausible plague has rendered the entire human race barren. How would… Read More
2024-02-28 23:15
Haven't had generic Spam in ages, but a can of it was on my tiny shelf in the kitchen. One evening I accidentally knocked the can over, remembered the Spam was there, and all night long had… Read More
2024-02-28 02:31
Call Her Savage (1932)Streaming free at YouTube Nasa Springer is out for a good time, but fiery-tempered when anyone does her wrong. In an early scene, she whips a rattlesnake into retreat… Read More
2024-02-26 17:39
Brady's Bargain (1983) Streaming free at Irish Film InstituteNEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#247 [archive]FEB. 26, 2024From theater-owner and very indy moviemaker Roy Spence, this is a s… Read More
2024-02-25 22:12
My nephew George is 50-something, and for 40 years he's been a stoner. When he's comes to the twice-monthly family breakfasts, he's gotten on my nerves, and when I've made an effort to spend… Read More
2024-02-25 06:50
Ben & Arthur (2002)Here's an earnest but painfully amateur movie, about the many travails of a man who's booted out of the Catholic church, not because he's gay, but because his brother… Read More
2024-02-24 11:47
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#406 [archive]FEB. 24, 2024The bastards have killed Vice Just another of the dwindling few reasonably competent media outlets, strangle… Read More
2024-02-23 23:43
My mom has always been worried about me and Jesus, since I was a little kid.When I turned 18 and moved out immediately, I continued going to church twice monthly, mostly as a favor to Mom. I… Read More
2024-02-22 18:55
A Woman Under the Influence (1974)Gina Rowlands plays Mabel Longhetti, a nice woman who's married to Nick (Peter Falk). According to the movie, she has a serious drinking problem, but it loo… Read More
2024-02-21 23:23
I've sunk into my recliner again. It's a wonderful place to be, perhaps my favorite place in the solar system. Sure beats hearing an alarm clock and wearing pants and going to work five days… Read More
2024-02-20 09:33
The Spook Who Sat By the Door (1973)Strictly for PR purposes, the CIA decides to hire its first and only black agent. The entire process is, of course, rigged to eliminate as many recruits a… Read More
2024-02-19 20:03
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#405 [archive]FEB. 19, 2024Study shows long-COVID hits hardest in Republican states Excerpt: Overall,
the CDC found that seven states i… Read More
2024-02-18 02:02
Doctor Who is a great concept for a TV show, and often it's truly a great show. A spaceman who calls himself The Doctor (yup, just 'The Doctor') lives in a blue box called the TARDIS, and ga… Read More
2024-02-17 00:22
If I took more pride in my writing, I'd have nothing to post today. You wouldn't be reading this.Still weak from COVID, I've been in my recliner for two weeks now, so there are no stories to… Read More
2024-02-13 19:14
"He's completely insane… and a bit magnificent." That's The Doctor — strange alien from another world, traveling across time and space, finding trouble, and being casually heroi… Read More
2024-02-12 01:56
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#404 [archive]FEB. 11, 2024That time Mojo Nixon and Don Henley sang "Don Henley Must Die" together Excerpt: "There I was, the king of bu… Read More
2024-02-10 16:33
A Hidden Life (2019)NEVERENDINGFILM FESTIVAL#242 [archive]FEB. 10, 2024Every time I try to watch something Terrence Malick has made since the 1970s, I hate Terrence Malick a little mor… Read More
2024-02-09 02:27
I could bore you with every wretched detail of the sickness, but it's too difficult. I'm so exhausted. Every word is a battle against not wanting to type it. Been staring down this paragraph… Read More
2024-02-07 00:38
My brother Clay had said he and his wife Karen would be there for breakfast, so of course they weren't, but my brother Dick and Young-sook, his wife who speaks three words of English, were t… Read More
2024-02-04 20:09
CRANKYOLD FART'SBROWSERHISTORY#403 [archive]FEB. 4, 2024Behind closed doors, Biden says Trump is a "sick fuck" We are years past the point where our leaders need to c… Read More
2024-02-03 15:24
The City of Lost Children (1995)Ron Perlman speaks French and plays a good-natured giant named One, who teams up with a little girl to try to rescue a little boy who's been kidnapped by an o… Read More
2024-02-03 01:37
Call centers keep statistics on everything, and there are more stats than baseball. Anything can be quantified by the software, which tallies every keystroke, every detail of every phone cal… Read More
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