Today when I talked with God He said, 'it's ok to be happy Rebecca, it's a sign of me cleaning your gutters.'
My internal God-carriers have become a bit clogged lately. I have been trying to cope with it by daily meditation sessions. But it hasn't been working and my mind has been whirring off into the night, although not with anxiety fuelled negative thoughts. Nice thoughts, just too many and too fast, making my head buzz.
I worried I was losing the self I had recently come to know in Christ's presence, all this Happiness - could it really be good for me?! It certainly felt good to be happy continuously for once, but I fretted I was not thinking seriously on His thought and laughing my connection to Him away.
Turns out I haven't been, and that laughter truly is both indicative of His effects and therapeutic in what it can do; return my mind back to peace by allowing laughter to become His rain on my pain.
Eckhart Tolle articulates succinctly the effects our 'pain body' can and does have on us and is worth a glance.
For me, I have learnt that the source of my happiness is only sustainable through my connection with Christ and need be reliant upon nothing external. Yet humour has been a major tool in my return to peace. Now I am having days upon days of clear feelings of happiness, safety, and purpose.
Go and find what makes you laugh and do it, look at it, read it, listen to it every day, it's 'side-effects' will heal your life in the area's you hold tightly sealed without any direct focus.