'What are you listening to?'
'Jay Sean. Down. Candlelight remix.'
'Tell me about it! I can never get enough of it and I've listened to it on repeat at least a million times.'
'I like this song from Vanessa Mdee, too. Nobody.'
'Yeah, it's nice... even though I don't understand a word they're saying.'
'Ah, probly about some guy who's super loyal to his chick.'
'Like you've had challenges with in your twenties?'
'You know, they say don't bring up the past if you want a successful relationship!'
'I'm not sayin' anything - I'm not the one who cheated.'
'It was in college!'
'So? She was still a teen but knew not to do anything like that... she wasn't even thinking about it! It wasn't in her reality!'
'Yeah and then I lost her for decades and never got her since - happy now?'
'You're so defensive about your flaws. Why can't you just accept criticism when you're wrong?'
'How am I wrong?'
'You're not taking responsibility for your screwed up behavior and are blaming it on other things. Like, 'I was in college! I was young... pathetic!'
'I should've never told you about my past. Just so you can throw it in my face? You think I don't know I screwed up? That I should've probly gone on that excursion that weekend instead of deciding to apologize to that snake of a midget woman I had a fling with?'
'Oh, so you still have feelings for your ex?'
'You don't just fall out of love, Kim.'
'So where does that leave me?'
'Is she here? 'Cause I only see you. All these other girls I see, does anything ever happen with them? Have you ever caught me flirting with anyone apart from you? Not even your friends got dirt on me.'
'You could be a smooth playa.'
'Or a calculating psychopath. Fortunately, I'm neither!'
'Look, I'll just be honest with you... I'm not gonna play second best if you ever see this chick.'
'Don't worry, I never will!'
'Yeah well, I don't wanna be with a guy who secretly still loves his old crush deep in his heart. I'm nobody's option - I'm a priority... an exclusivity!'
'Yeah, well, I heard women can love two different people at the same time. Like be married to someone and still be in love with someone else.'
'Goddammit! That's for women to be and for you to accept! I'm the woman here! So suck up that query of yours and man up 'cause I'm not gonna accept femininity twice!'
'... you wanna leave me, too? Go ahead, I won't chase you. I've run after every chick I know, all my life and all I ever got was nothing. It's 2018 - I'm tired of being not enough. From now on, anyone who may be anything to me, they apply and do the legwork! I'm nobody's b*tch! I told you my past to open up and confide in you. You bring it up and use it against me! And I'm the psycho? Go 'head and be jealous of someone you've never even met. I met her when I was 21! A lot has changed since then, I'm in my mid-thirties, for Christ's sake! I just brought her up 'cause I by chance saw her pictures last night when I was resetting my old phone. And I didn't know, I completely forgot, so when I saw them, I felt uncomfortable again. Like I've moved so far so well, why go back now? I wanted to delete them, so I marked them... but I couldn't... they still had value for me. I know she doesn't give a f*ck about me, probly never did and definitely never will, but I feel what I feel... and whether anyone likes it or not, it's a reality I have to contend with. But it's my cross I'm carrying... I'm not askin' no one for help or sympathy! I've been through hell for years and have been violently supplexed down to the ground by society for ages so as far as I'm concerned, this is just another issue I have to go through and move on! Nobody owns me! That's what you don't understand, I'm my own man! Nobody controls me, I'm autonomous! So you can leave that 'I'm female and insecure so I've gotta control my man.' at the door and tuck your chain when you're with me! 'Cause that sh*t will never work when you're with me! Otherwise, you can gladly leave my life and don't come back 'cause I'll continue, find someone else and replace you! I'm too funky not to be hooked up!!!'
She looks at him gob smacked, raised eyebrows, put in her place.
'Jesus... when I said man up, I didn't think you'd raise it to God level!'
'Huh,... yeah, whatever...'
'OK then - that's how I like it! I like my men to be dominant and assertive. You're a dark horse but I love the fact that you brood! It shows you've got a lot more than the eye can see... sexy!'
'... aight babe... let's get the basket you're looking at... before someone takes the last one.'
'Huh... oh yeah, it is the last one... you're still a loose canon, though - but you're cute!'
'Whatever you say, babe... whatever you say.'
- LeBron Jaymz
Captain, 1st Men's Basketball Team, Kigali
- Kim Carrdasheeyann
Top Chef, Hell's Canteen, Kigali
'What are you listening to?'