I want to tell you everything, everything that has ever happened to me, everyone that has ever hurt me. I want you to know it all. I really want you to know all of me. There is so much good, but also there is so much I try to burry. I try to Hide so much of myself because I am so ashamed and regretful of who I once was. I’ve also felt that the way to get someone to love me was to completely deny who I was in the past.
But then I met you. For whatever strange and twisted reason I want you to know all aspect of me and my life. I don’t want to hide who I was, who I hated being and who I have become. I have worked so incredibly hard for who I am now. I have struggled so much to overcome the guilt and self loathing that comes along with being an insure, self conscious, deeply hurting female. I have made very poor decisions in the past, and I occasionally still make them, but everyday I strive to be a better person than I was yesterday.
I don’t want you to think I am perfect. I want you to know that I am not, and still love me. I want you to realize that I make mistakes but still want to be with me. I want to be completely honest with you and still have you want me. I don’t want to feel the need to hide anything in fear of losing you. I want to be me, with my past, with my present and with my future and have you love me. That’s what I want.
This post first appeared on Drunkendyslexic | When One Mixes Booze And Bad Spelling No One Knows What's Gonna Happen., please read the originial post: here