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Salute Mother's Day, buy some hooch!

Tags: mother wine beer

I'm sure it's been this way for years, even decades, but this year, the weekly grocery store circulars for this Wednesday-next Tuesday, including Mother's Day tomorrow, stuck out at me.

When did Wile E. Coyote, Genyus, marketers get the "bright" (in the Dan Denett way?) idea of peddling booze, even if the focus is on Wine first, then beer, to celebrate Mother's Day?

Here's my snarky thinking on possible ideas behind that:

FIRST: Hey, dads, get your wife of 20 years drunk, then send the kids to the mall or whatever so she'll screw you for the first time in three months.

SECOND: Hey, dads, buy yourself some on-sale beer in case your wife nags you about an insufficient Mother's Day gift and nags you and the kids about not being appreciated enough.

THIRD: Hey, moms, feel free to drink that whole bottle or three of wine, tell the hubby and the kids to fuck off, then blame the booze.

FOURTH: Hey, single moms, buy yourself the wine, or beer, or whatever, then per "first," send the kids to the mall, then lock and bar the doors, whip out a couple of vibrators while getting drunk and give yourself a great Mother's Day present.

FIFTH: For married/partnered moms? Mom gets wine, dad gets beer. Both get half-drunk mad at each other, have angry sex, get drunker and madder yet, have more angry sex then makeup sex attempts as you get close to passing out, then forget about the whole thing the next morning.



This post first appeared on SocraticGadfly, please read the originial post: here

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Salute Mother's Day, buy some hooch!

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