Let’s talk about Meta, the tech giant formerly known as Facebook. That’s right, they rebranded after burning enough data bridges to make Nero blush. They changed their name but kept their habit of soaking up your personal info like a sponge made of Silicon Valley desperation. Meta: same mediocrity, new name!

Meta fighting disinformation is like a five-year-old claiming they’re going to clean up their room. You know damn well they’re just going to shove the toys under the bed and call it a day. Thanks, Zuck, for being the digital Marie Kondo with none of the follow-through.

Here’s the thing: Meta is disinformation. Every time they say they’re committed to the truth, Pinocchio grows a new nose we could use to vault over the moral low ground they love to inhabit. If Meta fought disinformation as hard as they fight for ad revenue, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation. Heck, I’m half-expecting Zuckerberg to start selling snake oil out of a vintage 1800s wagon at this point.

Now, let’s tackle the elephant—the blue, thumbs-up-happy elephant—in the room. I’m talking about their algorithm. That mathematical monstrosity that shoves conspiracy theories down your throat like it’s on commission. The algorithm is basically a high-tech version of Mean Girls, determining what digital drama gets thrust into our very reluctant laps.

Remember when Meta said they’d clean up their act after the last election? Yeah, I recall it too—it was as empty as a Kardashian running for city council. They promised change, but all we got was another season of watching our Aunt Linda post questionable memes about lizards running the world. Come on, Linda, at least choose a reptile with some charisma!

Meta likes to pat itself on the back for doing the bare minimum. They flag a misleading post, but do they remove it? Nope, that post is still there, marinating in misinformation like a bad recipe for disaster. I mean, seriously, if I made as many mistakes as they do, I’d have my own line of ‘Oops’ stickers by now.

What about fact-checkers, you ask? Oh, you sweet summer child. Meta employs them the same way toddlers pretend to eat broccoli: reluctantly and with about as much success. Those poor fact-checkers are like lifeguards at a pool party where half the guests are lead-filled floaties. They’re trying but let’s face it, they’re drowning in a sea of idiocy.

And don’t even get me started on customer service. Have you ever tried to contact Meta for help? It’s like shouting into the void, except the void sends you an automated email telling you it’s not their fault. It’s like calling a pizza place to complain about your order, and they offer you a coupon for more of their crappy pizza. Well, thank you very much, Meta. My social media indigestion is now complete.

Let’s talk data breaches, because Meta likes your data the way a six-year-old likes candy: incessantly and without any concern for the consequences. Their idea of privacy is about as robust as wet tissue paper. They have your information, your dog’s information, and probably a 3D map of your living room by now. Yet every time there’s a breach, they swear they’ll do better next time. It’s always “next time” with these guys. If they were any more insincere, they’d be running for office.

Online safety? Oh please. Asking Meta to keep you safe online is like asking Dracula to manage a blood bank. Every promise they make is just another way to keep you engaged, whether you’re doom-scrolling through the apocalypse or liking pictures of Aunt Linda’s latest lizard memes.

To sum it all up: Meta fighting disinformation is like getting a hug from a cactus. It’s filled with good intentions but you end up full of holes. The reality is, as long as there’s money to be made from chaos, they’ll keep the disinformation train chugging along. So next time they claim they’re cleaning up the muck, grab a mop, because you’ll need it for the BS they’re about to flood us with.

Source: Is Meta Done Fighting Disinformation?

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