Okay, so our world is ending. That rumble you heard a little while ago was from all the volcanoes in the world erupting in unison. The splash you are hearing now is the build-up to a tsunami. That thud you are about to hear in a bit would be our men losing their erections. Why is all this happening, you ask? 

Because Mahira Khan smoked. She wore a backless dress and smoked a cigarette on the streets of NYC with a colleague. Oh of course, the colleague was male too – Ranbir Kapoor, and he was smoking too. But that’s okay. He’s got a penis, she doesn’t. 

That makes all the difference. It is okay if Ranbir smokes. He is not a woman. He is not a woman who has hitherto played good girl in her all her movies. Mildly rebellious, playing a guitar and getting on her reel boyfriend’s bike, but good girl nonetheless. She was a girl who seemed like she could be attained. She could be chased around trees in a song sequence and she could  appear in men’s fantasies at night where they tear her into pieces in their lust, but if she smokes, she needs to be slut-shamed. 

And why the hell not? We have always allowed our men to think of women smokers as “bad women”. In Shri 420, Nargis was the fresh-faced Vidya, the good girl who taught morals to her hero. Nadira was the cigarette-smoking vamp – Maya, who tried to trick our man. Guess who won the hero’s heart? Then somewhere, in Kati Patang, Bindu’s sexiness and backless gowns were in direct contrast to Asha Parekh’s ‘good widow’ Madhu. Years later, in Cocktail, Deepika’s smoking Veronica didn’t even have a chance before Diana Penty’s demure Meera. In Fashion, the classic fresh-faced small town girl falls from grace and takes up smoking (oh, and drugs). 

There you have the problem. If you are not in a slightly crumpled cotton saree, hair braided, light jewelry on your arms and around your neck, taking care of your in-laws, children and husband, suffering quietly, you are still a “bad woman”. If you need a cigarette to deal with being tired or weary or frustration, you are a slut. Worse if it’s late night, you are with a colleague and you are wearing something that shows skin. 

Some even shamed Mahira for wearing something a woman from a Muslim country shouldn’t have – a dress, and in fact, a backless dress. Some said showbiz was obscene because “this” is what it leads to. But aren’t these the same people who would pay to watch Mahira in a movie? Aren’t these the same people who specifically open links related to showbiz to ravenously devour what’s being written? Also, aren’t some of these the same men who think it is okay to get physical with donkeys? Hypocrite much?

I feel for Mahira Khan, you know, I do! It wasn’t about the cigarette or the dress – she deserved to have some down time. And how she chose to spend that time was supposed to have been her choice. Not of some frustrated man sitting on some terrace furiously scrolling through photos on his mobile before deciding he had to call her out because he was…what, done? 

That said, I also feel one tiny thing that Mahira shouldn’t have done. She should have held the cigarette right. She’s holding it weird. And I do hope to god that she’s able to blow rings of smoke! This whole ‘controversy’ – or the lack of it – deserves those rings. 

Feature Image Source: IndiaToday