2016-03-19 18:53
This Blog was conceived earlier this year, far before the Rude Lightning website was up and striking; that is why the last entry was made in May. After finishing other priorities and overcom… Read More
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Rude Lightning Blog
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A consistent variety of content for those with short attention spans. Monkeys are funny.
2016-03-19 18:53
As this is my last week of college before graduation, it is only right to look back on what got me here...the beloved board game "LIFE". What I thought was just a mild-mannered children's ga… Read More
2016-03-19 18:53
There was an old woman who lived in a trailer,She had so many children due to an amorous sailor.She didn’t have a job, which never meant despair.They were able to survive on her welfar… Read More
2016-03-19 18:53
I’ve been hearing a lot of this, ‘Which came first, the chicken or the egg?’ and to be perfectly honest, the answer is neither. Before the chicken, or the egg, I tried &ldq&hell…Read More
2006-04-25 05:15
Poetry is like abstract art.Sometimes it's hard to see why it's any good Read More
2006-04-20 19:49
There are two huge airplane movies coming out this year. One is "United 93" -- the true story of the one plane that fought back during the 9/11 tragedy -- and the other is "Snakes on a Plane… Read More
2006-04-17 15:35
Sometimes things just happen, people. Calm down. I don't know how many times in a day a bird defecates on a windshield, and I get all this, 'Is this a sign? What did I do wrong? Why did this… Read More
2006-04-13 19:29
What if one day chicken stopped tasting like chicken and started tasting like...I don't know...Boston Bake Beans? Then everything that used to taste like chicken would now have to taste like… Read More
2006-04-04 19:47
So I finally got that new stool everyone's been talking about. I was a little skeptical at first. I have tried stools before, and they have always rubbed me the wrong way, but so many people… Read More
2006-04-04 19:17
You know what I love? Zombies. All kinds, too. Big ones, old ones, slow ones, fast ones. But what I love most about zombies are the unique and half-assed ways that they are brought into the… Read More
2006-03-16 19:35
The British food gave Mary cues,To look for a toilet to use.She thought she found the spot,And got ready to squat,On the floor of a store called “Lou’s.” Read More
2006-03-14 20:47
I love seeing behind-the-scenes footage and television promotions for films that have tanked at the point of their release--terrible films that have been panned by critics, and walked out of… Read More
2006-03-02 20:40
You know the disclaimers they now give for every movie rating: Rated R for intense nonstop graphic comic book violence, and offensive bodily humor. These taglines create a buzz--a sense of a… Read More
2006-03-01 02:08
So if a robot is a robot, and an android is a robot that looks like a human, and a cyborg is a robot mixed with a human, if a robot and an android had sex, would there child be a cyborg? Or… Read More
2006-03-01 02:08
So if a robot is a robot, and an android is a robot that looks like a human, and a cyborg is a robot mixed with a human, if a robot and an android had sex, would there child be a cyborg? Or… Read More
2006-02-28 22:56
We get it Madonna. You have an ass. You know, most people have asses; they help us when we want to sit down. But just because you have one, doesn't mean we all want to see you rubbing your c… Read More
2006-02-28 22:32
What once was a movie, and then was a television movie, is now a movie again. "Poseidon" is back, and it's offering more excitement and upside-down action than ever before. The 1972 film had… Read More
2006-02-28 22:30
Why do the Olympic medals have holes in them? Is it supposed to symbolize something: freedom, unity, love? Or are the people behind the Olympics just going with the ring theme?"Hey, you know… Read More
2006-02-14 04:23
I love world broadcast premieres because it's my chance to see movies that came out seven years ago, played on smaller screen with commercial interruptions every fifteen minutes. Are televis… Read More
2006-02-06 01:15
The movie "Brokeback Mountain" has broken down many walls, but it also seems it has put up new ones. I have seen and heard many people use the movie's title as a way to make fun of or put do… Read More
2006-02-01 05:07
If I could choose how I wanted my body prepared for the afterlife, I would not choose cremation or mummification, but rather exploitation. My body would go to a taxidermy, where I would be l… Read More
2006-01-25 19:23
Holy crap! Holy crap! Holy crap! "Final Destination" will soon be a trilogy—joining such classics as "Lord of the Rings" and "Indian Jones." Of course, the movie doesn’t come out… Read More
2006-01-25 06:24
Sadly, I was watching "American Idol" a couple nights ago and witnessed the most ingenious self-promotion trick I’ve ever seen. After several contestants were ridiculed for being terri… Read More
2006-01-24 19:59
Vampire movies look more like episodes of "The OC," minus all the tans. They've traded in their Bram Stoker's for WB's. They're more like exclusive clubs, and only the cool may enter:"I'm so… Read More
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