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The incidental homewrecker

Hello blog readers. This is the story about how I became known as an Incidental Homewrecker - at least according to one of my friends.

Ever met someone for a random hookup and it kind of developed into something more? I met someone online (as you do, or at least as I do) and we really hit it off. I'm just gonna call him A for ease. We stayed up till about 2.30am texting and when we actually met instead of just hooking up we spent a few hours chatting over a bottle of wine. We started seeing quite a bit of each other, maybe a couple times a week. Cooking each other dinner, watching TV, having a few drinks. Yeah I may have spent the night but still. When we first met he'd just gotten out of relationship, and I wasn't looking to get into one with my life kind of being up in the air for a number of reasons, so it worked out well. Though we did start to develop feelings for each other. We both realised it but didn't let it develop further. Which I was quite ok with.

At one point he mentioned his ex wanted to reconcile but he wasn't sure that he wanted to. Let's call the ex D. As in dickhead, or douche. Take your pick. We talked a bit about it but it was his decision and nothing for me to get involved in. We started hanging out less, he said he was busy with work and he went away and he was dealing with the ex. I liked him. But we weren't dating. I was quite happy to let him figure out what he needed to figure out. Yes I wanted to remain friends either way, but I didn't want to get in the way of anything.

And then one day I received this:


Firstly, woohoo, my first ever text from someone's ex. Secondly, umm hell no. At this point we hadn't hung out for about 6 weeks, the texts had been few and far between, maybe once a week, along the lines of "Hi, how's it going?". I was at the point where I understood he needed to work things out and I thought i'd wait for him to contact me, rather than the other way around. If he didn't, so be it. But his ex texting me to stay away from him? No fucking way do I take orders from that dickhead/douche. 

The first thing I did was contact A, basically saying D had somehow gotten my number and wanted me to stay away from A and never contact him again. Which I wasn't willing to do just because D wanted it so, and even if they did get back together there was no reason we couldn't be friends. That being said, I'd leave the ball in A's court.

As for D, I took my time in replying. I had a few versions that I ran past a couple of friends. They were like the good angel and the bad angel. One of them thought my responses were perfect. The other thought they were inflammatory and aggressive. Which they were, but that's how I felt. Hell hath no fury like a gay scorned, or something like that. You can see the progression below. On the far left is all me, a sarcastic bitch on a plate.
Somehow I ended up sending the one below - a sanitised version. See, I can be nice too.
D sends a reply, Apologising. Apologising is one thing, apologising because you were drunk is another. Of course I then regret not being my original true self in the first place. If there was ever a time to give it to him, this was gonna be it.
Putting something behind us is fine, but he's still a dick.
I ended it by saying I couldn't ask for more. But he's still a dick. And if I never hear from him again i'll be overjoyed. Though in some ways I hope he does message me again, it's quite entertaining.


This post first appeared on Living Thru Hell, One Day At A Time, please read the originial post: here

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The incidental homewrecker

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