Addiction.

I know there’s a larger picture to this than I deal with, but….it’s also the most obvious and evident point of entry that I deal with.

It may sound cute and possibly funny…but, I take it seriously and when I relapse it’s a horrible time and the effort to deal with it is ridiculous.

It’ then that I realize I must take my situation serious.

I may not be alone, you too may have the same addiction, just the delivery tool is different.

Frankly it’s hard for me to write about. I’d much rather tell of the planning process for my next major travel outing. I was working on it for a couple hours yesterday and it is quite challenging. That’s what I’d much rather write about and……I will, later.

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By the way the second leg of my next travel adventure is Costa Rica. I’ve been there before for a few weeks, this time it’s a 3 month adventure taking in the mountain and volcanos then hitting the Pacific and Caribbean coast lines. The pleasure and the trials of planning that trip is my refuge right now.

You may not take my addiction seriously and you may actually look past your own while downplaying mine….but I tell you, this is a real struggle for me for as long as I can remember.

To add to my frustration is seeing how parents subject their children to the same addiction, in most cases just to keep them quiet. It’s a temporary pacifier, with a raging ending.

Even though I’d rather write about my travel plans as I’ve mentioned and that this is a hard subject for me to deal with, the words just seem to flow off the tips of my fingers.

I guess it’s just a reckoning.

Tootsie Pops…

Should anyone want to set a trap for me, to trick me into getting in their car, making a clandestine meeting……Tootsie Pops is my Achillies Heel.

I know it sounds funny, but they are irresistible to me!!! That globe of sugar leading to the eventual Tootsie Roll…..gosh!!! Just the thought of it gives me a rush!

Seriously!!!

Why am I writing about this right now??? During my down and planning time I’m staying in my RV at my youngest daughter’s house. Inside her house on her Baker’s Rack is a HUGE bag of opened Tootsie Rolls begging me to just stick them in my mouth….. I mean I could seriously just sit there and spend an hour or two (if they’d last that long) just getting fucked up on Tootsie Rolls.

She doesn’t know of my addiction, she just knows of my love for Tootsie Rolls and in the past has gifted me with some.

I’ve been granted an open invitation to have ‘ONE’. Sadistic!!!!

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I recently found a second place delivery…..’Cherry Sours’.

GADS!!!! I’m ADDICTED!!!

The actual addiction is to ‘SUGAR’. Those are just the tools of administration that are the most likely to seduce me. Yes, ‘Seduce’.

Nothing else will matter or satisfy me once I’ve succumbed to the temptation. And it’s horrible with horrible results.

The sugar spike!!!! It makes me ill. Every moment leading up to it is sheer orgasmic pleasure. But once that ‘high’ is finally reach, then comes the downside…..I mean crashing down.

I shake, become irritable, sleepy and some times…..mean.

Sugar….addiction

I’m not without an awareness of this problem. I abstain from sugar products for the most part. I even watch my diet…..using mostly ‘Complex Carbohydrates’. Foods with a low ‘glycemic index’.

I know that at some point most people have heard of the bads of sugar and how they need to be avoided. And….in some cases it’s very difficult. We look to the obvious not knowing what foods convert into the dastardly element. And, I’m not here to preach nor educate anyone on this, this morning. I’m fessing up to my addiction.

I don’t drink soda pop. Nor do I use artificial sweeteners because they are ‘Trojan Horses’ carrying other problems along the way.

I do use ‘organic unfiltered honey’. It’s natural and unprocessed. Stevia is another sweetener that I fall back on. All the other stuff…..bogus and will wreck havoc on the human body.

A simple little colorful wrapped Tootsie Pop will make me into a puddle of humanity.

It’s cute and yet embarrassing.

Who would’ve thought that a simple, delightful, harmless looking Tootsie Pop could cause such a problem in my life. I didn’t!!

Allow me to be preachy just for this one moment.

PARENTS!!!! You’re doing a GREAT disservice to the health and well being of your children by feeding them with a steady stream of ‘sugar’ products. They are all package rather cutely, attractive and harmless….but they are packed with all the bad stuff that you wouldn’t knowingly feed to your kids.

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Realize!!! You can’t just take all this ‘Crap’ away from them suddenly!! They are now addicted!!! Slowly and persistently replace those foods with something better for them…..so they won’t end up with an addiction like mine.

Sugar is my addiction and it’s disguise as a Tootsie Pop …..sometimes a ‘Sour Cherry Candy’.

I’ve not succumbed to my addiction to Tootsie Pops with my latest temptation….and I’ve banned myself from it’s cohorts.

Addiction. It’s my greatest challenge.

Peace, love, and beaches,

John

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