We were at a waterpark… A huge bunch of young dynamic friends.! Adventure was our life and completing the given challenge was a must..! In the blanket of jumbling hormones sometimes and light of what is right never reaches the human..! We were exactly standing at the same phase of our lives…!!! Just when we were all enjoying the dare sessions… It was my turn to go and a guy from my group said – that girl in the pink attire… Go n tell her – your ex still misses u.. Do u wanna meet up? I hesitated..! But being what Rocking was and with encouragement from fellow friends.
I took a step ahead.. !!!
Hi ! I said. She turned back and gave a confused look.. To which I said.. Don’t look surprised, Varun is your ex right? He still misses u and wanted to know if u can meet…?!!!
Eyes filled of tears , the only reply I got was please go away.. Stop troubling me…!
And it didn’t take me time to realize – he was troubling her since long.! Just as I was about to apologize she disappeared. I approached my friend in furry to see him laughing and giggling and others applauding me for my success..!
Guilty I was…!!!! Just as I was about to fight with him for what he was doing – dhaaaam !!#%$&#!? A splash and we all ran towards the tide… The girl I just spoke to was lying dead…!!
To all – it was a suicide.. But to me – a murder..!! I killed her…!!! But my friends held me aback and said not to utter a word, and neither did I want to get caught… !!! We left the place as the police came in and completed the very small interrogation… Thankfully no one remembered my conversation with her so non of our group was questioned..! Just about to leave when I saw her mother who was enjoying sometime ago crying in sorrow and saying – she can’t suicide…!!!!!! She can’t die..!
I was back and days and months past I stopped staying in the group I used to always be with…! I didn’t tell anyone anything…but her mothers voice kept on ringing in my ears and I slowly turned into an calm introvert silently cursing myself for the death of an innocent…!
Finally Hostel life got over and I went home… And mom could clearly see sorrow and pain in my eyes… For the first few days she ignored and finally one night she came to my room and said…”Pain increases if not shared and guilt kills if not ATONED….!!!!”
I hugged her and told her the story…
Having Tears in her eyes she said – U didn’t kill her daughter – U killed mine…!!!!!!! And I can get my daughter only of she can get hers back… !!
She then wiped off her tears and went to her room.
I was confused and scattered…What did she say?? What did she mean??? What do I do…????????
I couldn’t sleep the whole night and the next day with fear I approached the breakfast table…
I was shocked to see bags packed – as I saw mumma and she just said – “So beta… Try to return her daughter to her – Only then can I have mine back…!”
Maa.. She is dead… I said. To which she replied – “Go … Atone your sins…Try to bring her back to their lives only then can u live.!”
Maa its been two years now and I don’t even know who is she and where she lives…How do I…as i went on she interrupted – Did u think before ?U have no rights to think now…!
Just go…. Bring my daughter back…Give a mother her daughters love…!!
I went running into my room
Unlocked my phone and called Varun…!!!
Asked him her name and address – he hesitated but I promised I will not cause any trouble..
After a lot of attempts he finally said – her name was Reeta and she lived near our college at Shimla…!!!
I packed my bags and set out to meet Reeta’s parents…!!
The address took me to a small house near our college hostel. Hesitant and scared, I rang the bell with shaky hands…!
A week fair catholic lady opened the door.She was the one I still remembered her crying … She was Reeta’s mother…!!!
I stood there . Not understanding what to say.!
She stared at me and said – Hi young lady , how may I assist you?
Hi aunty, I just came to meet you…!
Do I know you? she asked. but after a pause she exclaimed – Ooh u must be Reeta’s friend ..! Come on in.. Come come…
I went in and just as I was about to speak she said – Its Reeta’s birthday today…
How sweet of u to have come to wish me..
I miss my daughter but I am glad she sent you here today..!
It was a very sad moment for me.. It was even more hard to confess now.! I kept my bag down and aunty said – wait I will get u her birthday cake and water to have .!
You will like it.. I interrupted her and said – I killed your daughter aunty…! It was me…!!!
Tears rolled down her eyes and she was speechless.!
I told her the whole story and she was weeping to hear all that happened till my mothers reaction…!! I didn’t hide a bit now..!! I had atoned .. I was relieved…!!
Please punish me aunty I said… !
She held my hand , took me inside near Reeta’s photo and said, “Since 2 years I had been waiting for this day..! I had been waiting for someone to tell me that why my daughter chose to leave her lonely mother alone…!! You answered the biggest puzzle of my life… Wait I will get u the cake…!! “
I was shocked… And stunned…! I thought she would call the police and hit me but she had no grudges…. She came back with the cake and said… “Child… I lost my daughter and don’t want another mother to suffer so I won’t complaint against you…! But u have to atone your sin…! Light a candle each year on her birth and death anniversary…! Meet me once every year and give me the love my daughter would have given… !!!!”
I agreed and my mother got her guilt free daughter back.. !
Reeta’s loss always bothered but the very fact that I didn’t run from it cheered me always …. I kept meeting Maria aunty atleast once a year, lit candles on Reeta’s birth and death anniversary ….!
I am 50 years old and Maria aunty is no more, but aunty Maria and Reeta will always continue to be a part of my life .. Till my life…!!!!
Not all get such chances in life and not all mothers say –
Pain increases if not shared
and guilt kills if not atoned….!!!!
We teach children how to hide and proceed but not how to stand up and succeed…!!
I was lucky to have had the love of two mothers..! I do not know if I am a successful lady, but as a mother I think I have always taught my children to stand up for their mistakes –
For each individual will fall on the path of life, but to stand up is to live.. !