|I've accepted it I love me and that's all that matters|
It took me a long time to come to grips with it. I learned how to mask it and cover it, and go day-to-day without letting people see it.
I was criticized for it. I was made fun of for it, and as I grew older I cared less for it. I realized my personality shined through if I had it or not.
What was it? The gap in my Teeth. The mere space I have between my top tray and my bottom tray.
The space that formed because I used to suck my thumb till the age of.... HA! Yeah right you think I’ll say..ok I will.. till about the age of 19.
Okay, maybe 20.
I remember going into an acting audition at the age of 21. And I did exceptionally well. I was in Toronto, the agents loved me, but they had one quam. It was not what was coming out of my Mouth, it was what simply was in my mouth.
The woman, similar to an age of my mother said “ You’re beautiful, we love you, we want to hire you, but you’re going to have to do something about your large overbite.”
My over what? Hello? I had to ask her to explain. She said “ Your gap is unattractive. That’s the only thing people are going to see when they see you.” The comment brought me right back to childhood. Being called “ gap tooth, buck tooth” all that mean stuff. Only she said it, in a more polite, or what you would call “ professional” way.
Not that I didn’t want to fix it. Because I always have. I was insecure about it. I Hated it. But the shit is expensive to take care of! The dentist explained she’d have to break my gums!! BREAK MY WHO NOW? And it will cost 6, and 5 more zero’s! I don’t have that kind of cash!
I’ve hated my gap and spaces all my life! 3 years down the line after being in Toronto, I was working in a retail store. Our manager used to come in all the time to ensure we were doing things right. She was very cool with all of us. One day she wanted to talk to us about how we dressed, and how we represented the store etc; we had one by one meetings, and I thought to myself.. OH NO.. she’s going to address the elephant in my mouth!
To my surprise, she didn’t speak down about, yet she embraced it. I’ll never forget her words of blissful Beauty. “ Trish you are a light on your own. I love your look, I love your smile, you need to embrace your smile.. it lights up a room. I see you trying to hide it” . And then the unthinkable happened.. I broke down in tears. For years and years of trying to hide and be accepted for an imperfection that I hated but couldn’t change, and then finally someone found the beauty in it! WOW! Can we say eye opener.
From that day forward.. it’s been 9 years, I was no longer ashamed. Granted I do have a bond in two front teeth, but the space between my top and bottom teeth still remain. They don’t touch, they don’t close, and guess what.......I LOVE IT THAT WAY!
If I had continued to take on what people had said about my smile, and all the negativity I honestly don’t think I’d be as comfortable as I am now. Till this day though, I still get snickers and people saying little mean things, and that’s totally OK. Perhaps it’s because they haven’t found it in themselves to accept their own imperfections, or they just don’t like me. Either way, I’m still going to keep smiling--- and smiling with my mouth open.
One thing I’ve learned and took with me since the age of 21 was:
WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU, IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, IT IS HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF. You cannot pay your bills with people's opinion.
--And to tell you the honest truth, I feel great honey!
Miss Trish J