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Thursday 17th April 2008

Tags: song
Hello and welcome to this weeks edition of your favourite blog on the web. After the fun we had with last weeks 100th special, this week is going to be a much more controlled and stress free edition! All that back slapping was too much for me! So this week will have all the fun but none of the hassle! Its been a relatively quiet week as well. So really this is as much about the fact that I haven’t got that much news to bring you. We all have those quiet little weeks I suppose!

And for those of you wondering what happened to the Save Planet Rock campaign, well the latest news it that there is no news yet. We are now halfway through the extra month the station has been given and still no news! It's been a great week for Planet Rock with the three Sony Award nominations and a real slap in the face for Gcap, the current group that want to shut the station down.
Hopefully, if there is still any negotiating going on, this news will focus a few minds to close a deal. I honestly believe that a deal must be done by now and that it's just the finer legal points that are being sorted, along with other practicalities such as finding and kitting out new studios to broadcast and run the station from. Fingers crossed for the news we've all been waiting for this week or we're all going to start getting twitchy again!

Back to the blog now, all the regulars features will be here for you to enjoy. Ronnie has been out and about with his easel again with another Bull Plop story, there another Classic Track to enjoy, more Karaoke Classics, Celebrity Star Wars, a Captain’s Cocktail, another Crew member to meet and greet, another very Hot Chick, my joke of the week, more Films That Should Be Made, and of course my latest edition of Ask The Captain. But first here is as usual this weeks Every Picture Sings A Song…………

Here we are then with this weeks guess the song. Now yet again, I have been accused of making these to easy, and I thought that Purple Rain last week was a tricky one! So this week your getting it full bore, with what I am convinced is a right tricky little number. I mean its not like I don’t want you to get them, but the slower kids at the back of the class are starting to get them right now, so to task your brain cells a little bit more this week, take a look at this one, and then look at the clues to see if you can work it out. The person who gets it right quickest will have a pint waiting on the bar for them at the pub!

1. It was released in 1997 and was number one in the UK.
2. The song won a Grammy Award for Best Rock Instrumental Performance, which was surprising because the song does contain vocals and was not a hit in the United States.
3. It was recorded at the band's own south London studio, with the title taken from graffiti on the wall outside.

Now try that little beauty for size you bunch of smarty pants! I’m sure you are all going to get your answer right straight away, and not have to flick to the end of the blog to know you got it right, being so clever and all that! So you can just read on, safe in the knowledge that you got it correct, in fact I think you should send in your answers on a postcard, addressed to Every Picture Sings A Song, Captain Jacks Tracks, The Black Pearl, P.O. Box 666 Just Off The Coast Of Wherever I Am This Week!

Its funny you know, but my milkman is about 25 stone and looks like he could wrestle a crocodile! Must find out where that little lady delivers and make sure mine is a big order, nudge nudge! Right fancy a bit of class, well here is this weeks...............

Classic Track #13

Bark At The Moon ~ Ozzy Osbourne 1983

Now is this Classic Tracks or Classic artists, who cares. Ozzy is as much a national treasure as ooh I don’t know Nelson’s Column, and he has probably been covered in pigeon shit as well once or twice, probably just before he bit the head off one of the little buggers! As this is about Ozzy, this could go on for ages, and I think he probably deserves a whole week dedicating to him, as he has so many stories I could tell you about it would take up loads of space! But this is about the track, so I’ll try and keep it to around a 1000 words!

The song was released in 1983, and reached number 21 in the UK charts. It is the first track on his 1983 album of the same name. The song was composed by Ozzy, and of all his solo albums only here is writing credited to Ozzy alone, although he states the title track was co-written with guitarist Jake E.Lee. The song itself is about a mythical beast that once terrorized a town, was killed and then resurrected itself to once more wreak havoc. The music video, however, is about a scientist, played by Ozzy himself of course, who accidentally turns himself into a beast, is killed, and resurrected as a free human again.

It has been used as a track in several video games. On the Playstation 2 classic Guitar Hero, the song is rated as probably the hardest track to complete on the game. It was also used on the PS2 for the Grand Theft Auto: Vice City game, on the Vrock radio station. This song marked the first recorded after the death of Ozzy's original guitarist Randy Rhodes, who was killed when he went up in a small plane and the pilot started buzzing Ozzy's tour bus. On the third pass, the wing hit the bus and the plane crashed into a nearby house, killing Rhoads, the pilot, and the tour hairdresser. Rhoads was 25. In late 2003, Sharon admitted that in the early 1980's, she cheated on Ozzy with his guitarist, Randy Rhoads, although she had sex with him only once. She said she did it when she and Ozzy weren't communicating, and that Ozzy knew, but hated discussing it, and that they both cried whenever talking about Randy.
The single gave Ozzy his first UK hit single and the band appeared on Top Of The Pops. It was followed by the release of So Tired, which also was a hit in the UK. The video for Bark at the Moon features drummer Carmine Appice, who performed on the tour with the band but not on the album, which had the drum were played by Tommy Aldridge.

Ozzy's make-up for the album cover, and the video for the title track, was created by legendary film special effects artist, Rick Baker. Bark at the Moon was remastered in 1995 and again in 2002, although the 2002 re-issue was actually a remix of the album, not a remaster. Many fans were displeased with the remix, noting that some elements found in the original mix are not present in the remix, namely several lead guitar parts.
In the album liner notes for The Ozzman Cometh, Ozzy wrote "The title for this song actually came from a joke I used to tell where the punch line was 'Eat Shit and Bark at the Moon.' I'd had the vocal line for this and Jake came up with the riff. It was the first song we wrote together." In 1983, a 20-year-old Canadian man named James Jollimore claimed that this compelled him to stab a woman and her 2 sons to death.
At the time the record came out, Ozzy was attempting rehab at this time. His wife, Sharon, made him go to the Betty Ford Clinic, which didn't work. Ozzy finally went sober in 1991. According to the press, Ozzy's antics progressively reached a more dangerous point during the 80’s. His alcoholism and drug abuse continued. He later underwent a number of treatments for alcoholism and drug abuse.
After signing his first solo career record deal he came in to meet some of the people who worked at the record company. His plan was to release doves into the air to get people to notice him, but when no one noticed, he changed his plans. He grabbed a dove, bit its head off, then spat the head out. Then, with blood still dripping from his lips, a security guard came to remove him. Despite its controversy, this act has been parodied and alluded to several times throughout his career and is part of what made Ozzy Osbourne famous.

Ozzy found himself under fire in his controversial concert and stage acts that some parent-teacher associations, media content watchdog activist groups, including many Christian groups accused Ozzy of being a negative influence for teenagers. They claimed messages on his songs, actions, and the infamous horned hand gesture, and stage decorations are portrayals of devil worship and glorified Satanism, but Osbourne denies these accusations and he claims it was done in good fun, and was just to symbolise teenage rebellion and for shock value. Ozzy actually flashed a peace sign with each hand, and Ronnie James Dio was the one who was known for flashing the horns, which is actually an Italian tradition.
Ozzy has always been great and always will be! His style has changed over the years but in my opinion all of his stuff is classic. Although he is obviously not to everyone’s liking, he is an institution, and should be treated as such. Lets face it, there is only one Ozzy, and there probably will never be anyone like him.

I think its time for a little bit of a giggle now, so lets move from the Prince Of Darkness to my very funny.......

A sales rep was driving down the M1 the other day, going a little faster than he should have been. As he passed under a bridge, he saw a policeman laying in wait with a radar gun.
The policeman pulled him over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk, asked “Runway a little too short?”
To which the rep replied “I’m late for work”
The Policeman asked “Oh yes and what do you do?”
The rep replied “A rectum stretcher”
The policeman looked surprised and confused. “A What?”
“A rectum stretcher” He said again.
“And just what does a rectum stretcher do?”
“Well” said the rep “ I start by inserting one finger, then on to two fingers, then three, and four then with my whole hand in, working from side to side until I can stretch and stretch and then I slowly but surely stretch the whole until its about six feet”
The Policeman asked questioningly and cautiously “And just what do you do with a six foot arsehole?”
To which the rep politely replied, “You give it a radar gun and park it behind a bridge….”

Lucky Bunny I say! Now after the dissent in the ranks this week, I am bringing to you this week one of my most fearsome crew members in this weeks edition of............

Yar har har de har ha de har har aha aha me old hearties, and welcome to another member of me terrifying crew. This weeks we find a real little trouble maker, an little being the operative word me old bucko. He sails his ship The Mini Demon, and goes by the name of Pirate Christopher Rackham, or as you know him Mini-Me. Shiver me timbers. His is a sad tale, and thankfully it’s a short one as well! Thar she blows! He has been hung from the yard irons so many times, his little legs hardly ever touch the ground, and his evil mate is always battening down his hatches! Har har arrrrggggghhh. Cause of his size, he is often mistaken for a parrott, an is hoisted upon the crows nest, or hoisted up on the mizzen, the bilge sucking varmant.

Pieces Of Eight an all that pirate related stuff, I be off now to roger jolly or is it the other way round, until next time me old deckhands! Avast its me old Cat O Nine Tails Yar harrrrrrgggghhhhh

Well I'm sure you almost qualify Jessica. Just do a few sexy photo shoots. date a few ropey actors, act in a few crap films and appear drunk at some function surrounded by the press and your in, Oh wait your already have! See you in a few weeks then! Now talking about celebs, lets see what Ronnie has cooked up for us this week in..........

Well these soon come around quickly, and although it has been a quiet week, good old Ronnie has managed to still find a celebrity worth poking his brush at for you to enjoy. So who gets it this week then! Gordon Brown will discuss how to boost Third World education with popstar Shakira.The PM is due to hold telephone talks with the Hips Don't Lie singer. It is the latest in a string of showbiz encounters for the leader, who earlier this month, appeared on hit TV show American Idol in order to stamp out malaria. He has also been pictured alongside Hollywood star George Clooney after they talked about the Darfur crisis in Downing Street. This event is one of a series organised by the Global Campaign for Education, to highlight a pledge by world leaders that every child will have access to quality primary education by 2015. Some 72 million children are still missing out, according to the coalition of charities and teaching unions. On Wednesday, hundreds of schools around the UK are set to take part in the World's Biggest Lesson, which will see pupils from 120 countries taught the same subject simultaneously. As you can see Ronnie has caught Gordon and Shakira in their full glory. Ronnie told me that its such a shame his hips don’t lie, but then again his lips do enough lying! More from Ronnie next week.

Now just standing naked holding a heart doesn't automatically get you a place on the Hot Chicks, well I suppose it does if you used to be Buffy, but is she his week Hot Chick, well before you find out, lets calm ourselves with a little break and dive into........

Time to get your buisness head on this week in my little game selection. See how much money you can make in 14 days. Bet you can't guess what I called my shop!
Coffee Shop

Right boys, its the moment you have all been waiting for, the creme de la creme, the top of the shop, the point of the blog where slobbering is a must, yes it's time for this weeks....

Well I gave you a stunner last week, and what do you expect from me this week, another stunner, well feast your eyes on this little beauty, well when I say little I’m not on about her norks, because they are huge. I am of course talking about the very Hot Kelly Brook. And as you can see, her assets are clearly on show. Who said that our English Girls are not as Hot as the rest of the world! Not me I can tell you.

After leaving school in Rochester, Kelly studied at the Italia Conti stage school in London for three years before becoming a professional model. Kelly's modelling career began at 16 after winning a beauty competition, her early work was in a range of advertising campaigns, including for the new Bravissimo company that specializes in bras and lingerie for full-figured women, and for Foster's beer. Brook is 5 feet, 8 inches tall, and her voluptuous figure caught the eye of the editorial team of the Daily Star who began featuring her as a Page Three girl.

Kelly's picture soon began appearing in other lad mags such as FHM and Loaded. She topped the 'FHM 100 Sexiest Women in the World 2005' list, which was said to have polled 15 million people. In a poll over 5000 women in April 2005 for Grazia magazine she was considered to have the best British female body. Now whoever voted at that snobby mag Grazia may well of been right but I’m not sure, so lets take another look at that voluptuous figure again.

Brook has also done a large amount of commercial swimwear, sportswear, and hosiery modeling, and a limited amount of nude & semi-nude modeling. Recent modelling work for Triumph Bras caused quite a stir because of specially commissioned 50-foot high billboards of Kelly's bust. Now I can’t imagine what that would of looked like, but if its anything like this picture, I for one would have had trouble driving past without drooling!

In 2006 she released her own successful ranges of swimwear and lingerie at New Look stores nationwide, and in February 2007 it was announced that Kelly had signed a contract, reported to be worth a million pounds, to be the new face and body of Lynx bodyspray, known as Axe in the US and on continental Europe. In 2007 Kelly also launched her own signature fragrance, the bottle shape will replicate her famous curves. Yes you’ve guessed it, it’s time to take another look at them.

In 1997 Kelly started to breakout onto TV, and started getting work presenting youth television programmes on MTV, Granada and Trouble TV. But her big breakthrough into mainstream presenting came in 1999 when she was chosen to replace Denise van Outen as the female half of The Big Breakfast presenting team, alongside Johnny Vaughan. Kelly remained for half a year and then parted company with the show in after resigning, but who can blame her for not wanting to work with Johnny Vaughan. He said she was only on the show because she was a babe, well what else would she be on there for, apart from taking everyone attention away from Vaughan, the talentless gimp! Back to the babe anyway!

Kelly has appeared in minor roles in a string of movies including Sorted and Ripper, and she played the girlfriend of Clark Kent/Superman's best friend Lex Luthor in four episodes of Smallville during the show's first season. She had a brief role as the character Lyle's girlfriend in the 2003 movie The Italian Job, and in 2004, she had her first first starring role in the film School for Seduction. The film was pretty lame, but she did get down to her undies in it a couple of times. Fancy a peek then do you!
In her personal life, she for many years dated British actor Jason Statham, but when he moved to Hollywood and his career took off, their relationship fell apart and they split. She is now currently betrothed to American actor Billy Zane, famous for such films as er well not a lot really because he is not that good. He must be a bit stupid as well, because he say’s that Kelly is no good in the kitchen. Well she looks pretty good to me.

Kelly is currently rumoured to be about to star in the next Carry On film entitled Carry On London, and also she appeared in hit BBC One show Hotel Babylon, which apart from the episode she was in, is a pile of poop! Kelly has also appeared in those stupid Celebrity Late Night Poker shows, but apparently she is not that god, as she always seems to put off the other players, Hey but we all have our own bluffs when we play poker, so who are we to say it’s the wrong way to play. Oh well that’s it for this week, but lets take a final look at Kelly playing poker. Another Hot Chick Next Week Boys.

Right lets get on with some more Celebrity bashing then, in this weeks Celebrity Star Wars. Now I know that most of these are just people dressed up as Yoda, but this week its time to go deeper my friends, and take a peak behind a very scary mask. Yes it’s the mask of Star Wars bad guy, Darth Vader. Now if you were Luke Skywalker, it would be bad enough finding out that your Dad was big, black, batting for the dark side, prone to wearing leather and sounded like James Earl Jones, but what if you took off his mask to find out that he was none other than Mr Bean!

I mean talk about unlucky, still could be worse, wait till he finds out who his sister is! I’m surprised he never noticed the family resemblance. More next week.

Well after that shock I think its time we headed off for a little calming drink down at………….

Sex With The Captain

1 ½ shots Spiced Rum
1 ½ shots Ameretto
1 shot peach schnapps
1 measure of Cranberry Juice
1 measure of Orange Juice

Put the Spiced Rum, Ameretto and Peach Schnapps into a cocktail mixer and shake together well. Pour the mix over ice and into a tall glass. Top up with the measures of Cranberry and Orange juice. Garnish with a cherry and serve.

Right then lets take a little taste of this one, oo and its named after me! Gordon Bennett. Its got more kick than a herd of donkeys on heat. Think I’ll try just one more. I must tell you though, I had to visit the doc’s this week about my drinking, and he recons that my problem is to find inner peace I must finish everything I have started. Show biffour I left the owse thish morning, I fin shielded a bottle of Merlot, a bittle of Shhhardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a biddle of vodka, a pockage of Prungles, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valum scriptions, the res of the cheseescke an a bix of chacliotes, Und de you no Yu haf no idr who bloudee gud I fel. I fink I mey of find me inr pece.

Looks like you may of had one to many already love. Don't worry form a queue, and you amy get your dream to become a Hot Chick! But I think that the other two before you probably stand more of a chance to be honest, but you enjoy a little drink at the bar with me and I'll see what I can do!Right I think its about time I dished out a bit of help to one of my lovely readers. Yes it's time for this weeks.......

Now after last weeks new feature opened, literally thousands of letters have been sent to my Advice Line. Its impossible to help all of you, and that really hurts. But your Captain is here to help in any way I can. My dedicated team of researchers is sifting their way through the sacks of mail we have received, to root out those who most need my help, such as this letter I received from Gloria in Lower Peover, Cheshire. She writes:

I had this incredibly real dream last night in which I had sex with my 40 year old female boss. I am 20 and I am also a female. I woke up feel very warm and wet 'down there'. I have only ever been with men and I have never had the desire to be with another woman. Me and my boss are friendly. She's very nice to me and we talk a lot both in and out of work.
In the dream we are first by a pool talking and then she pulls down her top to reveal her breasts and I tell her to stop as it's not appropriate. We continue to sit by a pool and then we move into her apartment. She leans in to kiss me. I pull back and she asks me what is wrong. She tell me she thought I wanted something more. I kiss her back and then we have fantastic sex. What do you think this dream means? Can you help Captain?

Captain Jack Replies:
Ha ha ha young lady, this just happens to be my field of expertise! Unless you are a dog of course in which case I can’t help love, just not got the time, what with the blog and all. Did you send a picture… Yes… Jezzz what a hound. No wonder your dreamin about being a lezzer luv your hammered. Did your mum used to give you meat so the dogs would play with you! Very warm and wet you say, it was probably the kebab you were eating in the picture you’ve sent in! But if you want my honest opinion, your dream means that you have run out of Horlicks and you secretly fear your dog makes plots against you with the household furniture while you are out, or maybe it means you saw the future! the 40 year old woman was actually you! And you will turn into a lesbian exactly a year from the day you had the dream, on the stroke of 12 at midnight! The 20 year old female you will meet 20 years from now. And you will of lost at least 40 of the stone you are carrying so you at least look like a normal lesbo and not Jabba The Hutt! I do hope this has helped, and don’t forget to keep reading, and if you do get any more lesbo urges, then take time out to study the Hot Chicks.

Another fine bit of advice handed out their I’m sure you will agree. I feel like I am really giving something back.

So after all the good vibes from that, its nice to calmly move on to this weeks musical interlude. Up first is another classic Live Is Best, then the Karaoke Classics and finally the Alternative Music History. So without further ado, lets get on with this weeks……

Paul Rodgers, Brian May & Slash ~ All Right Now

Wembley Arena 1994

Welcome to this weeks Karaoke Classics. Well on the singing front this week, it was a busy one. As far as the night went, it was very quiet this week, in fact the running order for singers went Gaz (The KJ), Shaunio and me, for almost the entire night. In fact I think there was only one other singer on the entire night. Now not being one to pass judgement, but I hardly think that changing the KJ has made that much of a difference, in fact it’s made one difference, in that it seems less singers are now coming in. And to top it all off, there was only 5 teams battling over the three prizes in the quiz. Thankfully, due to my superior leadership quality, and the fantastic knowledge of my fellow team mates, we blew the opposition away and won the top prize of the £10.00 drinks voucher, which lasted for around as long as it took me to walk over to the bar, I think about 6 seconds! I’m pretty certain the middle two weeks always have been and always will be the quiet ones, as people can’t afford to drink all the time with such high prices, and this week the beer had gone up another 5p a pint, scandalous!
So onto this weeks songs. Well I managed five this week, and all five were classics as well. In fact I think this is probably the best mix of songs I have sang together for months. They were 1. Ain’t Talkin’ ‘bout Love by Van Halen 2. Starcrossed by Ash 3. Wind Of Change by The Scorpions 4. Piano Man by Billy Joel and 5. Paint It Black by The Rolling Stones.

Ain’t Talkin ‘bout Love by Van Halen

Highest UK Chart Position: No UK Release

What a blinder to start off with. This is the second song to feature in two of my section, as is was a Classic Track earlier in the year, the other of course being I Believe In A Thing Called Love, which has been a Classic Track and a Live Is Best, I wonder which will be the first to feature in all three! It was released in 1978 from Van Halen’s debut album. The song is about casual sex, something David Lee Roth was known for. He had the roadies give out back stage passes to beautiful women at Van Halen's concerts. There was a $100 reward if the roadie sent one back he slept with.
This song gets at least as much radio play now as when it first came out. Van Halen took a few years to get a big following, so many of their early songs are now Classic Rock staples because they were never overplayed when they first came out. It is considered one of the rawest songs the band has ever recorded. The song almost has a punk feel, yet the solo and guitar virtuosity of Eddie Van Halen shines throughout the record.
It is especially interesting considering the fact that when Eddie originally wrote the song a year before the album was released, he didn't even think it was good enough to show his band mates. When he finally did show it, he was proven wrong and it was recorded for the debut album. During the solo, Eddie even played an electric sitar to create a slightly middle-eastern melody.
The band became a staple on Hollywood's Sunset Strip during the mid-1970s, consistently playing at well known clubs like the Whisky A Go Go. In 1977 Gene Simmons from Kiss, saw Van Halen and financed their first demo tape, flying the band to the Electric Lady Studios in New York to record Running With The Devil ad Ain‘t Talkin‘ ‘bout Love, which he described as the rawest rock track he had ever heard.
When Van Halen first appeared, there was a rumour that the group were actually members of KISS without their make-up and attire. If you take a close look at early pics of them, David Lee Roth resembled Paul Stanley, Eddie Van Halen resembled Ace Frehley, and Michael Anthony resembled Gene Simmons. This rumour may had been fueled by Gene Simmons' discovery of the group, and the fact that Van Halen had appeared right around the time KISS had taken a break from the recording studio in 1977. The rumor was soon quelled when the individual members of KISS released their solo albums in 1978 around the same time Van Halen II was released, and people began to really notice the height differential between Alex Van Halen and Peter Criss.

Starcrossed by Ash

Highest UK Chart Position: No 22 July 2004

Starcrossed was the second single released in a physical format from the Meltdown album. The song was A-Listed on BBC Radio One and was expected to be a major hit for the band, but in fact only made it to number 22 in the charts. However, the song was successful in the long run for the band and is considered one of their most popular songs.
The song is Meltdown's only slow paced song, and is a power ballad based on 'Romeo & Juliet', with lead singer Tim Wheeler saying in an interview “ I've always loved that grouping of words that Shakespeare did”
The track is unusual for the band in many ways. One of the most notable ways is the fact that all the guitar work is handled by Wheeler in this video, while Charlotte Hatherley handles piano duties. The track was played at every concert on the Meltdown tour, but has yet to appear on the tour accompanying Ash's latest album.
The video for Starcrossed was again directed by Jeff Thomas. The video is basically a classic Romeo and Juliet tale, filmed on location in Romania, the video sees the band perform the track in an old church with blue neon crosses surrounding them, and Charlotte on the piano. Mark Hamilton, the bands bass player, has commented on the video saying "We flew to Romania to shoot this tribute to Romeo and Juliet. The performance was shot in a church in Bucharest. The local priest was pretty cool but he got annoying telling us to turn the music down and blowing out the candles because wax was dripping on his floors! The story is a bit Ghost Whisperer! Oops, hope I didn't ruin the end?... The video's definitely our most epic and grand yet. Strongly inspired by Romeo & Juliet, thousands of candles, blue neon crosses, real actors and shot widescreen. Should look very cinematic."
The band have just come off the back of a sell out UK tour, and earlier this month it was announced they are to make their debut appearance at this years Download festival at Donnington.

Wind Of Change by The Scorpions

Highest UK Chart Position: No 2 Oct 1991

Well the classics just keep on coming at you tonight don’t they, and there is better yet to come. Next up is a song that surprisingly I have never sang before, but have always wanted to.
Wind of Change is a classic rock power ballad written by Klaus Meine, vocalist of German rockers The Scorpions. It appeared on their 1990 album Crazy World, but did not become a worldwide hit single until 1991, when it topped the charts in Germany and all across Europe, and hit Number 4 in the US and Number 2 in the UK.
This song is about the change the world will get after the Cold War ended. Since the war was against Russia, the lyrics go “I follow the Moskva. Down to Gorky Park” and after it ended then everything would become better. The Moskva is another word for Moscow and Gorky Park is a famous amusement park in Moscow. After the Cold War ended, and communism declined, the world is supposed to become a better place and this is seen through a Wind of Change. This is referred to in the song with the lyric "The world is closing in Did you ever think That we could be so close, like brothers The future's in the air I can feel it everywhere Blowing with the winds of change", meaning that the world is becoming a better place and people are becoming closer, like brothers. and that soldiers are all returning and are feeling the change.
The chorus goes “Take me to the magic of the moment On a glory night Where the children of tomorrow share their dreams With you and me” which tends to mean that the people of the future will live in peace and with no wars, its a magical world. Now correct me if you think I’m wrong, but these Germans aren’t half nutters aren’t they, I mean it’s a rock ballad for goodness sake!
The band wrote this during a visit to Moscow in 1989. The previous year, they became the first hard-rock band to play in Russia, and they returned to play the Moscow Music Peace Festival. At this show, they were inspired by the sight of thousands of Russians cheering them on even though they were a German band. Lead singer Klaus Meine said in an interview "Everyone was there, the Red Army, journalists, musicians from Germany, from America, from Russia-the whole world on one boat. It was like a vision; everyone was talking the same language. It was a very positive vibe. That night was the basic inspiration for Wind Of Change."
It was also used in1990, when it became the unofficial anthem for the fall of the Berlin Wall, an event that united Germany and inspired hope for peace throughout the world.

Piano Man by Billy Joel

Highest UK Chart Position: No UK Release

Its song number four of the night, and yet again it’s an absolute stonker of a classic. Piano Man" was Billy Joel's first major hit and is considered his signature tune. The verses of the song are sung from the point of view of a bar piano player who focuses mainly on everyone else at the bar. John the bartender, the waitress, and bar regulars like Paul and Davy. Most of these characters have unfulfilled dreams, and the pianist's job, it seems, with the help of alcohol, is to help them forget about life for a while. The chorus, in bar-room sing-a-long style, comes from the bar patrons themselves, who plead, "Sing us a song. You're the piano man. Sing us a song, tonight. Well, we're all in the mood for a melody, and you've got us feeling alright."
The song is a fictionalized retelling of real people Joel met during his days as a piano-lounge singer in Los Angeles, at a bar called The Executive Room, after the failure of his first album, Cold Spring Harbour. Joel's own personal feelings about this failure are expressed in the failed dreams of the bar patrons in his song. At the time, Joel was trying to get out of a bad deal with the record company Family Productions, so, according to Joel, he was hiding out at the bar, performing under the name Billy Martin while Columbia Records tried to get him out of the deal.
This is the first song and title track to Joel's breakthrough album, which he released after signing with Columbia Records. His first album was released by Family Records in 1971, and the contract Joel signed to get that deal came back to haunt him. As is often the case with young musicians, Joel did not understand the contract, and it bound him "for life" to the label. Joel was forced to pay royalties to Family for years after breaking the deal and signing with Columbia.
The line "Paul is a real estate novelist" is about a real estate broker who was a regular at the bar who always claimed to be working on a book. Joel figured Paul would never finish because he was always in the bar. The harmonica part was inspired by Bob Dylan. Dylan was the first person Joel saw use a strap to hold the harmonica so he could play another instrument at the same time.
Joel has recently spoken about his time playing at The Executive Room. He said in the interview "It was a gig I did for about 6 months just to pay rent. I was living in LA and trying to get out of a bad record contract I'd signed. I worked under an assumed name, the Piano Stylings of Bill Martin, and just bull shited my way through it. I have no idea why that song became so popular. It's like a karaoke favourite. The melody is not very good and very repetitious, while the lyrics are like limericks. I was shocked and embarrassed when it became a hit. But my songs are like my kids and I look at that song and think My kid did pretty well”

Paint It Black by The Rolling Stones

Highest UK Chart Position: No 1 May 1966

Last song of the night, and yes you’ve guessed it, another cracker! And I didn’t even pick this one either. As there was time to get another one in at the end of the night, I asked the other half to pick a song and put it in for me to sing. To be fair I expected something by Take That or Bon Jovi, but she didn’t let me down, and picked one of the greatest songs ever! Shockingly she does have some taste after all.
It reached number one in both the US and the UK charts. The song was credited to Jagger and Richards although all of the band members contributed substantially to it, especially Bill Wyman, and founder member Brian Jones. The song began with Wyman playing organ at a recording session, in parody of the group's former co-manager Eric Easton, who had been an organist. Charlie Watts accompanied the organ by playing a vaguely Middle Eastern drum part, and Watts' drum pattern became the basis for the final song.
Brian Jones contributed the song's signature sitar riff and acoustic guitar, and Jagger contributed the lyrics, seemingly about a man mourning his dead girlfriend. The lead electric guitar and the background vocals are provided by Richards.
The song is written from the perspective of a man that is depressed because his love has died. The song is about everything turning black because he is depressed. Many of the parts of the song can be interpreted to back this. The line “ I see a line of cars and they're all painted black” refers to a line of cars that are black, either limos for the family and or friends at the funeral, or they're not black in real life, he just sees them as black because he is depressed.
Also the lines “I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes I have to turn my head until my darkness goes" could refer to the fact summer clothes are usually colourful, and this shows that he doesn’t want to be depressed, or else his darkness wouldn't go. Some of the lyrics contradict each other, as if he just feels so many emotions that he doesn't know what to think.
In recent years, the song has become associated with the Vietnam War due to its use in the ending credits of Full Metal Jacket and the opening credits of TV show Tour Of Duty. Its other film appearances include For The Love Of The Game and 1997's The Devils Advocate, which included a cover version in French by Marie Laforet, in addition to the original version played during the closing credits. The pilot of Nip/Tuck also uses the Stones' version of the song. And most recently it was used in the PS3 game Guitar Hero III, although it can only be played in the solo section of the game, as the bass line could not be lifted from the track.

I think thats enough Karaoke for this week, so lets move swiftly on to this weeks edition of.........

Now she has been the biggest female star on the planet for many years now, and she has changed styles more times than I can remember, reinventing herself to blend in with current trends. I am of course talking about Madonna, who has just hit the top of the UK charts for the 13th time, making her the most successful female artist of all time, all that and she is 50 this year as well. But what if she had taken another path and joined rockers AC/DC and dressed up like lead guitarist Angus Young in a school uniform. Not as sexy as when Britney Spears did it, but as you can see she plays a wicked guitar! Rock On Madonna!

Yes I do tend to give you many treats don't I, even if I do say so myself, but then again thats what I'm here for. Let us head off to Hollywood now and see another great hit movie that will never see the screen, that is of course unless George Lucas and Steven Speilberg have started to read me every week! Yes its time for this weeks......

Enough with the music and film and Celeb bashing for this week, too much of a good thing will wear you all out. How about a bit of footie, you know a good old laugh along story. Well how about you read this weeks........

It was reported in the Spanish Press that David Beckham had a narrow escape from a serious injury when he went riding one weekend while playing for Real Madrid. Everything was apparently going fine until the horse started bucking out of control. He tried desperately to hang on but it was no good. With his foot trapped in the stirrup, he w

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Thursday 17th April 2008


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