Last year, Selena Gomez abruptly ended her Revival Tour to seek treatment for anxiety and depression. In a new cover story with Vogue, she opened up about the pressures that led to her mental health breakdown, pressure from touring, and what her life is like today.
Ok freaking out a little. Thrilled to share my first American @voguemagazine cover with you! Read the story and see the full spread in the link in my bio. Photographed by @mertalas and @macpiggott
The already-shy performer revealed she could not relate to her newer demographics of fans because she wasn’t allowing herself to face her own issues.
“Tours are a really lonely place for me,” she explained. “My self-esteem was shot. I was depressed, anxious. I started to have panic attacks right before getting onstage, or right after leaving the stage. Basically I felt I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t capable. I felt I wasn’t giving my fans anything, and they could see it—which, I think, was a complete distortion. I was so used to performing for kids. At concerts I used to make the entire crowd raise up their pinkies and make a pinky promise never to allow anybody to make them feel that they weren’t good enough. Suddenly I have kids smoking and drinking at my shows, people in their 20s, 30s, and I’m looking into their eyes, and I don’t know what to say. I couldn’t say, ‘Everybody, let’s pinky-promise that you’re beautiful!’ It doesn’t work that way, and I know it because I’m dealing with the same shit they’re dealing with. What I wanted to say is that life is so stressful, and I get the desire to just escape it. But I wasn’t figuring my own stuff out, so I felt I had no wisdom to share. And so maybe I thought everybody out there was thinking, This is a waste of time.”
I want to thank Rob Haskell for writing my story. I was a little nervous at how honest I was but you depicted where I'm at perfectly. I'm so grateful @voguemagazine @mertalas @macpiggott ❤️
In rehab, Gomez says she was able to shed the trappings of fame to focus on getting well.
“You have no idea how incredible it felt to just be with six girls,” she says, “real people who couldn’t give two s—s about who I was, who were fighting for their lives. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done, but it was the best thing I’ve done.”
Despite being the most followed person on Instagram in 2017, Gomez insists that she’s gone “under the radar” on the social media platform where she’s the most-followed user.
“As soon as I became the most followed person on Instagram, I sort of freaked out,” Gomez said. “It had become so consuming to me. It’s what I woke up to and went to sleep to. I was an addict, and it felt like I was seeing things I didn’t want to see, like it was putting things in my head that I didn’t want to care about. I always end up feeling like shit when I look at Instagram. Which is why I’m kind of under the radar, ghosting it a bit.”
Through it all, Gomez said she’s interested in anonymity.
“Look, I love what I do, and I’m aware of how lucky I am, but — how can I say this without sounding weird? I just really can’t wait for people to forget about me.”
Wearing @coach for @voguemagazine !!
With no movies coming out and no album dropping soon, Gomez finally feels like the pressure is off.
“For a change, it feels like I don’t have to be holding my breath and waiting for somebody to judge a piece of work that I’m doing.”
Read the full Vogue profile here.
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The post Selena Gomez Opens Up About Depression, Instagram and Rehab in ‘Vogue’ appeared first on PRO MOTION Music News.