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Weird Things Beings Have Done To Avoid Wrinkles

You’ve more likely heard about all of the odd, crazy everyday charm hacks, as well as expensive beauty managements that some rich fames “swear by” to enhance their Skin, as, hair–whatever. Like say, Kim Kardashian’s ghoul facial or Ashley Graham’s windex hack for rid ourselves of self-tanner blotches, or truly any asinine hack that a luminary discovers on social media that automatically disappears viral. But what you might not know is that there are plenty of average parties out there that likewise have some exceedingly strange situations that they themselves swear by in order to achieve better ogling skin and whisker. Register: all of the spooky happens parties have done to avoid Wrinkles.

That’s right, the committee is people out there that for some reason can’t merely rely on a good ol’ fad anti-wrinkle serum to do the trick. Instead, they’ve went as far as chafing semen all over their faces in hopes of reversing the effects of aging and impeding wrinkles. So if for whatever reasonablenes adding retinol to your skincare routine in order to avoid fine positions just doesn’t sound promising,( or you simply precisely need a good laugh ,) read on for all of the bizarre acts that parties have done to avoid wrinkles.

via Giphy

1. Urine Therapy

So apparently the committee is parties out there that believe pee-pee on a cotton pad and then chafing it on their face is the secret to maintaining a youthful glowing. Why “youre asking”? Well, according to The Sun , a UK-based brochure, Stella Ralfini, a 71 -year-old grandmother who lives in London, credits adding urine( yes, urine) to her daily skincare procedure as the secret to maintaining her youthful radiance. The kicker? This lady has been scratching pee on her skin since she was in her 30′ s. That’s right, for the past 40 times, “womens issues” has been rubbing her own urine on her scalp in order to evade wrinkles.( I want your best friend to know this the next time they say that I’m gross for only bathing my “hairs-breadth” formerly a few weeks .)

Now, I’m not repudiating Stella’s skin, because by the ogles of her photos that ran in The Sun, grandmother does have it going on. And while there are reports out there that even though aren’t scientifically-proven, they still demand that since urine is chock full of enzymes and minerals that can help certain issues like eczema and acne. But still, I find it hard to believe that Stella’s pee is to thank for her good skin, and not simply the other parts of her skin care routine, which she mentions is to purify, tint, and moisturize.

via Giphy

2. Vampire Facials

Unless you live under a ginormous, pop culturally oblivious stone then you’ve likely noticed that every time Kim Kardashian does something as minor as pluck out a butt “hairs-breadth”, it’s mentioned as a headline on endless websites. And while you’ve likely followed her roller coaster “hairs-breadth” translations from light-headed and long to dark and short to that pink shadowed she wore in Tokyo earlier this year, you might also remember one of her more dreadful elegance minutes: when she got that” Vampire Facial .” On one occurrence of Kim and Kourtney Take Miami , Kim stepped into a spa with Jonathan Cheban and got a facial where the esthetician eventually pokes you, obligates you bleed( and holler ), and then uses your blood as some sort of sick, morbid face disguise.( Call me a crybaby, but I’ll stick with my GlamGlow face disguise , thank you very much .)

Well, Kim isn’t the only self-obsessed psycho to ever get this facial done, in fact it’s actually a pretty favourite medication. As far as what the medication actually does , it expends a Dermapen to puncture minuscule pits in your skin which encourages collagen and elastin fibers to induce your scalp smoother, but when you lather on the blood, that’s when the facial really works because the platelets from the blood farther arouse collagen and elasticity.

via Instagram

3. Merely Sleeping On Their Back

If we’re being honest, I actually dislike the concepts of get pregnant, if not for any other ground than the fact that you have to invest the duration sleeping on your back.( JK, I’m also loathing it because you can’t booze for nine months, but still .) So when I found out there are sick people out there that actually choose to sleep on their backs even when they’re not carrying a child, just to shun get wrinkles, I was mind-blown. Hello, if going wrinkles while “youre sleeping” is your regard, have you ever heard of using asilk pillow occasion to prevent fine routes?

While sleeping on your back is actually a “hack” proven by dermatologists to prevent wrinkles, I’m still not here for it. According to a speech had with Debra Jaliman, MD, a New York City-based dermatologist, the derm claims that “… sleeping in this way that your face comes into contact with cotton pillowcases like on your surface or gut can lead to the creation of deep sleep routes on your forehead and buttock .” How? Because according to Jaliman, since wrinkles are caused by loss of collagen and elasticity, exploiting the reproduced pressure of sleeping on your surface or belly will merely promote the outage of collagen, eventually leading to visible lines.

…Whatever. I’m still sleeping on my belly. That’s why God devised anti-wrinkle serums.

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3. Sheep Placenta Facials

Apparently moms–celeb and um , non-celeb–swear by ingesting your placenta for glowing skin. January Jones even travelled as far as obligating her placenta into pills to take every day. And while that’s all good and fine and probably makes a brand-new mommy feel empowered and whatever, what I don’t understand is why the f* ck there are people out there that swear by sheep placenta facials. Like, who in history waken up one day and said ” Ya know what? I’m going to watch a sheep give birth today AND THEN I’m going to grab that slab of placenta, threw it in a flask, and then go back and slap it on my face and hope that it helps to prevent wrinkles .”

Well, apparently there’s a spa in NYC that offers these facials and claims that the placenta is rich in enzymes and proteins which help to target skin concerns like monotonou, uneven colours, eczema, psoriasis, acne, sun damage, wrinkles, and fine lines.

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4. Sperm Facials

So I’m not even going to touch on my own experience with whether or not my face has previously been come in contact with seman because my mom speak my tales, but what I will tell you is that apparently jizz( do other beings call it jizz or am I a 20 -year-old frat son ?) is filled with protein and protein is good for your skin. Now, are there other ways and means of nourish your skin with protein other than telling some f* ckboy failure on your face? Yes, there surely are, like by applying one of the following options nourishing( and cheap) face serums.

via Giphy

5. Avoid Smiling

So according to the Daily Mail , there is a 50 -year-old woman identified Tess Christian that lives in the UK and claims that she hasn’t smiled or laughed in about 40 years all to avoid wrinkles and fine strands. Tess maintains such a straight face at all ages that her friends have nicknamed her” Mona Lisa .” I make, I understand that “laugh lines” are a real thing, and by the examinations of it, Tess doesn’t appear to have them, but my question is how has she shunned laughing or smiling? Has she never watched Billy Madison ? Do her friends just share sh* tty memes with her? She’s obviously not a big turds joke being and clearly “ve never” read any of our Bachelor recaps. And I only help wondering: sure, she has avoided wrinkles, but at what payment?

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6. Bird Poop Facials

Okay, I don’t care, I will take a sperm facial over a fowl turd facial any period( sorry, Mom ). Now, I’ve heard that when a chick sh* ts on you that it’s a sign of good luck, but some sickos had to take it a pace further and scratch bird poop on their face and say that it frustrates wrinkles and brightens the skin. The most crazed fraction? It’s actually an expensive therapy at some upscale spas. No thank you.

via Giphy

Image: Kat Love/ Unsplash

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Weird Things Beings Have Done To Avoid Wrinkles


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