Going through a divorce is definitely not a pleasant experience. While in most cases it is a mutual decision, it invariably takes the toll on the mental and physical health of the once-espoused individuals. In spite of what it seems, divorce is never spontaneous, since there are always certain series of events that lead to it. These string of events themselves sprout from the various apparent and obscure issues that trail back to the moment you took the decision to tie the knot with a person. These are basically the fundamental reasons for a Marriage to end in a divorce, and in this article, let’s take a look at some of those reasons. Presenting 14 commonly-cited reasons for divorce, which are more or less avoidable.
1. You Married For A Silly/Ambiguous Reason
It is one of the top reason for divorce, and one of the most easiest to avoid. Often, we assume someone to be a prospective life Partner but little do we focus on the exact reason why we would like to get into a wedlock with that individual. For example, you might just marry someone because he/she has lot of money or has killer looks. Little do you focus on the fact that marriage is not about the highs, it is also about those lows, and those are the times when cracks in the bond set in.
2. You Are Not Ready To Compromise
Marriage brings its own share of compromises. No marriage is an exception, and every married couple has to work through a series of gruelling adjustments that transform their lives completely. You must always acknowledge this fact, and be mentally prepared for it before you wed. Your inability to adjust or stubbornness to do so can eventually make your spouse call that divorce lawyer.
3. You Feel Like You Are Losing Yourself
This means you find yourself transforming into a new person. Remember, there is always going to be an eventual change in your personality after marriage. In other words, you will not be the same person you were when single. Such a change is okay and there is no harm in that. But often there are spouses who deliberately try to change their partner in order to make them perfect. That surely leads to a discord between the two.
4. Those In-laws Are Worst Than Thorns!
A social study by University of Michigan published in 2012 found that when a lady had cordial relations with her husband’s parents, the percentage of the couple’s divorce decreased by 20 per cent. It is a no-brainer why this happens, since having bothersome in-laws is one of the top reasons for divorce around the globe. Tumultuous relations with one’s in-laws results in a strain on the relationship between husband and wife, which often results in a separation or divorce in worst cases.
5. Substance Dependence
This should come as no surprise. Substance abuse has spelled doom on several marriages across the world. Addiction towards alcohol or drugs often leads to an anti-social behaviour towards the spouse, eventually leading to a divorce.
6. Poor Sex Life
There are two sub-reasons here. One is the inability of one of the partner to satisfy the other or feel satisfied by the efforts of other. And the second is not dedicating enough time for intimacy. The latter sub-reason is one of the leading causes of disharmony among married couples in 21st century. As people get busier, they find less time for some good old bedroom fun, eventually losing interest in it completely.
7. Financial Incompatibility
This one can cause some serious problems but it is also one of those that can be rectified very easily. It is all about the difference in spending habits, and how one deals with money. While one partner may have no hesitation taking loans, the other may be more inclined towards savings. Differences here often lead to arguments, which eventually lead to total separation.
8. Lack Of Romance
Sex is important. But first come love and romance. It need not always be candle-light dinners but there are always small things which you can do to maintain the spark in your relationship. Many couples tend to become mechanical with their marriage, missing out on love and romance completely. Needless to say, they eventually lose interest in the wedlock itself.
9. Having No Common Ground
There is a likelihood that you and spouse are totally opposite to each other even when it comes to general tastes and preferences. There is nothing wrong about that, and it is completely normal. But as time passes by, a couple should always strive to find a common ground where they can stand. This means finding things that you love doing as a couple. Most couples do not invest time and effort in this, eventually growing so obsessed with their differences that can’t see eye to eye any more.
10. Leaving Loose Ends In Conflicts
Often, to maintain congeniality in relationships, couples do not delve deeper with their arguments and abandon it at a particular point without any conclusive solution. While it may seem a good thing to do but in reality it is creating the perfect recipe for future disharmony. Often, the bone of contention comes back snapping at your relationship in the future, tearing your bond apart.
11. Being Fickle
As humans, we are naturally attuned to look at attractive faces. While it is okay to let your gaze land on someone attractive for some extra seconds, it is important to not let things go beyond that point. Cheating in relationships is one of the leading causes for divorce, and there is no surprise in that.
12. Lack Of Trust
This is worse than the previous point and will causes more damage to your marital life. Suspecting your partner for every move and step he/she takes is calling for trouble in your wedding. In most cases, one of the individual is not will reach a saturation point, eventually leading to a split.
13. Being Possessive
This is what lack of trust eventually leads to. While having a feeling of ownership about your partner is a good thing, taking it too far is quite unhealthy. There have been cases when couples quarrel just because one of them is so possessive that the partner now dictates what his/her partner will wear and go. It leads to a fight, subsequently leading to a split.
14. Unrealistic Expectations
Overall, it comes down to a lack of a pristine vision for your marriage. It is good to have an avant-garde vision for your marriage but one should never carry the baggage of over-the-top expectations. That is simply going to weigh down the flight of your matrimony. Most of us tend to be carried away by the images of a perfect couple leading a perfect life, but marriage is nowhere close to that. While there is nothing wrong to think that way, getting obsessed with that image can lead to clashes, which in turn can have negative repercussions.
So the ones you’ve read above are the most commonly-cited reasons for divorce. Remember to always be open and clear with your partner. That will help maintain the romance and friendship in your relationship, eventually leading to a happy and successful marital life.SHARE THIS STORY ON FACEBOOK
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