That's part of our policy, is not to be taken seriously, because I think our opposition, whoever they may be, in all their manifest forms, don't know how to handle humour. – John Lennon #quote

Men and women are not free to love decently until they have analyzed themselves completely and swept away every mystery from sex; and this means the acquisition of a profound philosophical theory based on wide reading of anthropology and enlightened practice. ~ Aleister Crowley #quote

The family is the test of freedom; because the family is the only thing that the free man makes for himself and by himself. ~ G.K. Chesterton #quote

I come from a small town whose population never changed. Each time a woman got pregnant, someone left town. ~ Michael Prichard #quote

Art is the Mirror of our betrayed ideals. ~ Doris Lessing #quote

The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be. ~ Robert Fulghum  #quote

A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable. ~ Ogden Nash #quote

There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the infinite passion of life. ~ Federico Fellini #quote

I believe more in the scissors than I do in the pencil. ~ Truman Capote #quote

We come into the world laden with the weight of an infinite necessity. ~ Albert Camus #quote

The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift. ~ Ogden Nash #quote

If it's stupid, and it works, it isn't stupid. ~ Murphy's laws of combat #quote

Happiness is just how you feel when you don't feel miserable. ~ John Lennon #quote

Men are convinced of your arguments, your sincerity, and the seriousness of your efforts only by your death. ~ Albert Camus #quote

Programming today is a race between software engineers stirring to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning. ~ Unknown #quote

A bizarre sensation pervades a relationship of pretence. No truth seems true. A simple morning's greeting and response appear loaded with innuendo and fraught with implications. Each nicety becomes more sterile and each withdrawal more permanent. ~ Maya Angelou #quote

True wisdom for a general is vigorous determination. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte #quote

How can I die? I'm booked. ~ George Burns #quote

Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and therefore congenial to it. ~ G.K. Chesterton #quote

A good cause can become bad if we fight for it with means that are indiscriminately murderous. A bad cause can become good if enough people fight for it in a spirit of comradeship and self-sacrifice. In the end it is how you fight, as much as why you fight, that makes your cause good or bad. ~ Freeman Dyson #quote

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. ~ Douglas Adams #quote, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

The pursuit of truth will set you free; even if you never catch up with it. ~ Clarence Darrow #quote

Be quick to learn and wise to know. ~ George Burns #quote

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries. ~ Sir Winston Churchill #quote

What we don't understand we can make mean anything. ~ Chuck Palahniuk #quote 

Water, taken in moderation, cannot harm any body. ~ Mark Twain #quote

Happiness does not lie in happiness, but in the achievement of it. ~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky #quote

Writing has laws of perspective, of light and shade, just as painting does, or music. If you are born knowing them, fine. If not, learn them. Then rearrange the rules to suit yourself. ~ Truman Capote #quote

Sarcasm: the last refuge of modest and chaste-souled people when the privacy of their soul is coarsely and intrusively invaded. ~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky #quote

Even if you understood women, you'd never believe it. #RusstheMaleChauvinist

A man is a worker. If he is not that he is nothing. ~ Joseph Conrad #quote

If you don't love, you can't live; if you don't live, you can't love. ~ Jason Benson #quote

The greenhorn is the ultimate victor in everything; it is he that gets the most out of life. ~ G.K. Chesterton #quote

We none of us expect to be in smooth water all our days. ~ Jane Austen  #quote

I feel an earnest and humble desire, and shall till I die, to increase the stock of harmless cheerfulness. ~ Charles Dickens #quote

No person is important enough to make me angry. ~ Carlos Castaneda #quote

If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. #OneLiners 

The secret of how to live without resentment or embarrassment in a world in which I was different from everyone else...was to be indifferent to that difference. ~ Al Capp #quote

I look better, feel better, make love better and I'll tell you something else....I never lied better. ~ George Burns #quote

Fame is only good for one thing - they will cash your check in a small town. ~ Truman Capote #quote

Men are never really willing to die except for the sake of freedom: therefore they do not believe in dying completely. ~ Albert Camus #quote

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh. ~ George Bernard Shaw #quote

True contentment is a thing as active as agriculture. It is the power of getting out of any situation all that there is in it. It is arduous and it is rare. ~ G.K. Chesterton #quote

Solitude is strength; to depend on the presence of the crowd is weakness. The man who needs a mob to nerve him is much more alone than he imagines. ~ Paul Brunton #quote

Riches do not consist in the possession of treasures, but in the use made of them. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte #quote

The honest poor can sometimes forget poverty. The honest rich can never forget it. ~ G.K. Chesterton #quote

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. ~ George Bernard Shaw #quote

The old idea that the joke was not good enough for the company has been superseded by the new aristocratic idea that the company was not worthy of the joke. They have introduced an almost insane individualism into that one form of intercourse which is specially and uproariously communal. They have made even levities into secrets. They have made laughter lonelier than tears. ~ G.K. Chesterton #quote

I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law. ~  David Dinkins #quote

If you receive something that says "Send this to all your friends", please consider me not your friend. #OneLiners