The definition of healthy Relationship isn’t when you two don’t fight, and don a smile. But it is when, you two don’t sabotage each other’s mental peace, and put each other’s mental health on priority.
Wherein, you put your ego aside by turning off the spotlight from you. And contemplating what all happened between you two, that caused such negative emotions to wallop.
Is negativity between a couple inevitable?
Negative emotions between a Couple can take up their headspace, and result in fights.
The more negativity is expressed from both sides. The more anger, verbal fights, and toxic tar are spilled from each other’s mouth.
The effect of which continues for hours, days, and in extreme cases it stays for months. The more you don’t talk about it, and push it under the table. The more it grows and multiplies.
This in turn results in:
- Stress, anxiety, sadness, mood swings, and feeling of numbness,
- Lack of motivation, and loss of interest in work,
- Sleep deprivation, and restlessness,
- Not feeling hungry, and lethargic.
Check out: 8 Stress Relieving Outdoor Activities that’ll bring you closer to Solitude
Do only couples who don’t trust each other fight?
Negative thoughts don’t take time to birth, they just need a trigger point. Sometimes negative emotions don’t occur because there isn’t trust.
Because there is infinite Love, which brings forth fear of abandonment due to attachment.
A person could be anxious about their uncertain future, and may feel jealous if their partner is getting unwanted attention. Possessiveness and not sharing how you feel and keeping things to yourself can also cause a melting point.
Since the will to be in the relationship vests in the hands of two people. And one cannot force someone to stay and during such times of destitute.
Therefore, some dark thoughts may linger in your mind, when things are not fine in your kingdom of love. Even happy couples having a rock strong relationship face such issues.
So here are some important relationship rules of happy couples that you may like to read. Let’s spill the 10 secrets of Happy Couples for a Strong relationship, which are:
 Always have an Open Conversation:
Connecting with someone is the most beautiful thing a soul can desire for. Because it allows you to share your life with someone, who feels like home.
Therefore, everybody wants to pour their heart out, and try their best to give meaning to their feelings. However, not everybody is a smooth talker, and some feel weird to be candid about their feelings.
Because they feel, what if the one you love misinterprets, what you are trying to convey.
Hence, they lock their feelings and words inside their chest. This can make you anxious, and the weight of things left unsaid can deteriorate your mental health.
Imp Read: Why you must take care of your mental health | Brain Exercise for better Mental Health
The importance of having an Open Conversation:
One needs to be vocal about his/her feelings to save oneself from future setbacks.
So don’t wait for the time, when things go wrong, and it’s too late to reconcile differences.
Because then, you’ll recall all the times, when you wanted to raise a question, to stand up for yourself, and stop being mistreated. But you didn’t have a word with your partner, and instead chose to ignore those red flags.
When this happens, you’ll realise that such mental and emotional suffering could have been stopped by speaking up. And putting an end to it, even before it started.
It’s always good to talk about things you feel in your gut, as it can save you from the future hurt.
How Open Conversation helps in building a Strong relationship:
Sometimes, things don’t turn out the way we want. But couples, who have a strong relationship built on the foundation of trust and respect, understand each other.
They have heart-to-heart conversations. Wherein, they don’t hesitate to speak about things that bother them.
Therefore having an open conversation is necessary because:
- You two can confide in each other,
- Correct each other whenever one of you goes wrong,
- Speak up about things that affect you, and
- Clear all the misunderstandings.
 Repair your relationship after a fight by taking the initiative to talk first:
Happy couples understand that just like things, ugly moments too have an expiry date. And to keep those emotions tucked to your heart for a long time, only breeds toxic emotions inside.
Sometimes arguments happen and you may not like to talk at the moment.
But pulling it like an elastic, and blaming each other, only extends the cold war. Especially when you know that you two will rebound.
The simple relationship mantra of strong couples to repair your relationship after a fight is to “talk.”
Please remember when you do so, make sure:
- Don’t immediately start talking about things that caused the fight.
- Don’t pinpoint your fingers at each other,
- Don’t try to win the argument instead shift your focus to another topic.
- Take a time-out if needed and wait for things to cool down,
- Then return to the root of the issue, and try to resolve it.
- Finally, makeup with a hug, or add a pinch of humour, to feel grateful for being together.
 Get rid of Ego and say Swaha to it:
Ego is the worse enemy which some people keep as their sidekick. And oftentimes, when relationships end it is due to ego issues.
How ego ruins relationships:
Relationships sour, when one among the two is always putting his “ego” in between.
When such people are corrected and confronted for their mistake, they never accept it. They play the blame game are either rude, unapologetic, abusive, or defensive.
Needless to say, such people don’t make any efforts. Or appreciate their partner’s patience for handling their hot-headed attitude.
Therefore, ego sinks their boat because such individuals get triggered easily. They give a hard time to their partner, and even their dear one cannot tell— when, why and for what reason, they are going to explode.
How ego creates tension in the mind as well as the relationship:
If the image you have created inside your head, about yourself is much bigger, and important than your relationship.
And you desperately want to save it and plaster that image. Even more, than you are willing to save, that weakening thread of love, between you two.
Then you know, whether you care more about your ego, or about saving your relationship.
Check out: How to Get over the Loss of Someone who is still Alive
Know the Secret Sauce of Happy Couples:
Getting rid of ego is the secret sauce of happy couples, who burn their ego in the fire-pit. Because they know and have experienced, how a hint of ego pushes two people apart.
[4.] Forgive but don’t forget the lesson:
“Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.”― Bruce Lee
Strong couples learn from their mistakes and never repeat them again.
They keep a keen eye on themselves, observe and accept their mistakes, apologise for it, and keep working on their road to self-improvement.
Check out: 8 Things you shouldn’t do in the Name of Love
 No secrets and lies:
A relationship is built on the foundation of trust, faith, and honesty. If one of these collapses, a relationship falls apart.
Therefore, couples who are happy, and have a strong relationship follow “honest is the best policy” advice.
Being loyal comes naturally, when your love is true:
When your love is pure being loyal isn’t a responsibility, but a natural phenomenon that occurs deep inside.
When your love is true, malign thoughts/intention, and the need to deceive your beloved doesn’t come across your mind.
Not because such individuals are afraid of lying, or prefer to be secretive about, the sins they committed. But such things never cross their minds, as they believe— honesty is the biggest form of intimacy.
Therefore, being honest is one of the most important relationship rules of happy couples for a strong relationship.
 Reminding each other that you are together forever:
Sometimes, you might have those sacred feelings of love tucked safely inside your heart, which you don’t allow to be seen often.
But its always good to let those emotions breathe by expressing your love for your special one.
Read: There isn’t a Perfect way to Love because Love comes in many Expressions
Why it’s important to tell that you two are together for the long run:
There are times, when a person needs to be felt assured of the longevity, and the future of that kin.
Sometimes, a little reminder, that you two are together for the long run is enough to fill that void.
Especially, when your partner is insecure about the future of the relationship. And is both eager and anxious to know, whether you are ready for adding a new leaf in your life.
Therefore, its always better to kill that tiniest bit of doubt in its initial stage. Since not talking about it, and sharing your priorities only creates tension between the couple.
: Respecting each other’s existence by giving importance to mental health:
One of the things that have been tossed around by couples, is the need for caring about each other’s mental health.
It’s surprising to see that when it comes to relationships too much emphasis is given on happiness, individual goals, freedom, rights, etc. But very little on paying heed to each other’s mental health.
Especially in this age, where there is a growing concern for recession, pandemics, cut-throat competition, increasing materialism, and inflation.
Why relationships are losing their meaning in modern times:
Though we are progressing, but human relationships are becoming seemingly irrelevant for many people. Especially ones, who are heading towards the hookup culture.
While those who are together don’t care much about their partner’s mental health. Whilst centring the relationship entirely around themselves to fulfil their emotional and physical needs.
Therefore, only some relationships survive, and a few actually make it to the alter. While just a tiny bit of it lives happily ever after.
How Happy Couples take care of each other’s mental health:
Couples who are happy regularly water their relationship with patience. This in turn helps them to check up on each other’s mental health.
If you want to take any relationship advice it is to be patient with your partner. Because patience is the key to a healthy relationship. So check mark this relationship rule, and start listening to each other patiently.
Because the more you’ll listen, the more you’ll develop empathy for your partner. And your beau won’t have to handle that situation alone.
Check out: 15 Signs that Suggest your Child is an Empath & How to Embrace the Gift
Mental Health Tips for Couples who care about their Partner’s Overall Health:
If you genuinely care about each other and want to take mental health seriously in your relationship.
Then avoid these things, as they disturb mental peace, and are responsible for tearing relationships apart. Due to:
- The lack of patience, and not listening to each other,
- Fighting over little things, and not wanting to have a disclosure
- Being egoistic and having self-centred attitude,
- Using reverse psychology by playing a victim in a relationship, and victimising your partner with it.
- Dominance in a relationship, and contempt
- Ridiculing your partner’s fears and not accepting his/her problems.
 Not taking the relationship for granted:
Another big issue for many failed relationships is, they took their relationship for granted and didn’t see it coming.
The quote I am sharing here, speaks about the nature of relationships in a satirical way. Do re-read it, as you’ll have polar thoughts about it.
“People put so much effort into starting a relationship and so little effort into ending one.”― Marina Abramovic
Every relationship at some point in time needs a fresh breath of air. Therefore, merely letting the relationship go with the flow doesn’t work well.
Because perfect relationships aren’t made perfect by nature. But they are made perfect by putting continuous efforts, which should come from both sides.
Check out: Loving a Lone Wolf | How to keep a Relationship on with a Loner
 Expressing love in your unique manner:
Love has no language yet it can be expressed in many ways.
Couples having a rock-solid bond know the importance of expressing love for one another. Which can be done in many ways depending on the personality, likes, and dislikes of your soulmate.
Because if your significant other is reserved by nature. Then displaying your love in public wouldn’t be the nicest gesture.
As such a person would choose something more personal, which stays between you two. Such as written poetry or even a meal or dessert cooked by you, which is their definition of romance.
Expressing love and feeling it warming up your heart, is beautifully worded by, Serbian poet Dejan Stojanovic, who writes:
“It is beautiful to express love and even more beautiful to feel it.”
― Dejan Stojanovic
Here’s a Poem on Love: My favourite Cloud
 Acknowledging Sacrifices, and being positive about Future Growth:
One of the biggest challenges faced by couples is when, they have to make life choices for the betterment of their relationship. For which, sacrifices are made, and they are made in the name of love.
Because couples who have a strong relationship understand, that in the end, love is what keeps their life going smoothly.
Therefore, love prospers when sacrifices are acknowledged and not used as a tool to blame. Or to make your partner responsible for everything.
You may also like:
- The Power of Introversion: 8 Qualities of Introverts & How to Benefit from It
- Him, I & the Man with the Saddest Eyes- Mystery Man Story
- Suicide Contagion: Is Media exposure the Reason behind more Suicide cases reported after Celebrity Suicide
Let thy spirit be high in love. Namaste
The post Relationship Rules: 10 Secrets of Happy Couples for a Strong Relationship appeared first on Melody Of Words.