Today no one is surprised by couples who met many years ago on the Internet and still live together. So, if you want to find your man, don’t rush to speak disdainfully about Tinder, Happn, Badoo and other dating apps. There you can meet your destiny, too. We tell you how to increase the chances of this.
Take advantage of these tips – at least they’ll save you from very bad dates.
SET THE TASK
When registering or editing your Profile, you’re aware of what it’s for and what you’re looking for. And for a specific task, you choose a Photo, a signature to it, and define filters for yourself, through which you’ll consider and like or reject candidates. It’s a delicate psychological moment, so approach it with maximum responsibility – think about it, talk to your friends. Feel what you need at this stage of life. Maybe you just want to communicate on the Internet? Or you want a lot of compliments and admiring attitude? Well, feel free to use the filter by age, starting from guys three years younger than you and ending with peers. There’s nothing to be shy about, even if you clearly feel that you just want to find a good lover for a while to recover from a difficult relationship and not be distracted from work, and save your heart from shocks. In this case, just lower the intellectual bar a little and pay more attention to candidate’s photo. Ideal if it’s a beautiful selfie or a demonstration of the body in the bathroom or gym mirror. Men are very specific creatures, they directly signal what they want to get.
CHOOSE A PROFILE PICTURE
You want to appear incredibly beautiful, sexy and alluring – and here you’re choosing photos from the best photo sessions three years ago, selfies with a huge number of filters and photos in underwear. It can work if the task is to find a lover. If you want to find a partner for a serious relationship – carefully choose photos that clearly show your face with its natural expression, with a smile and an open look. Don’t put one selfie – a man, even the most intelligent and subtle, should understand in advance what kind of figure you have. Show it, but delicately – let it be a photo in a tight dress or jeans. It’s great if there are also pictures where you do what you love – some hobby or just from work. Don’t try to appear more beautiful than you are, don’t use photos where you’re not really look like you, but “look well”. After all, sooner or later a real meeting will happen.
CREATE A PROFILE DESCRIPTION
Don’t put only photos – it is insufficient information about you. You really should suffer with a description, coming up with an appropriate and creating at least a hint of your character and goals. It’s important not to create a false impression about yourself, even if it’s a hundred times positive. If you’re a sensible girl in adulthood, with a clear goal to find a husband or even a father to a child from the first marriage – don’t hesitate, and write. If your sense of humor and common interests is important to you, specify them, make a joke, and demonstrate the mood that is present in your life as a background.
SET UP FILTERS
So you got to the most exciting stage – you’re looking at candidates. In Tinder everything is simple: like a guy – swipe the picture in one direction, don’t like – in the other. If your liking for each other turns out to be mutual, the app sends a notification, and only then you can correspond. At the time of viewing, include all your boredom and prudence, intuition and all the originally feminine things. Study each profile before you like it – this is what will save you from empty and unpleasant dates. Try to connect the simplest psychology, looking at a photo of a guy. Are there any signs of self-love, obsession with appearance? You will find this a mere trifle as soon as you come across a photo of a real handsome man – but be prepared for the fact that such a guy has a lot of “open” relationships, will wear out your nerves and will always look to the side.
Don’t turn away from unsympathetic, at first glance, guys – pay attention to the smile, photo and his profile description. Remember how many not-so-pretty guys have the kindest hearts! Of course, it’s great if you can see from the photo that the guy is interested in the same things as you – some kind of sport, nature, travel. This is a reason to give a chance, even if his appearance isn’t very attractive at first glance.
ADD YOUR STUBBORNNESS
Set a goal of three likes a day. No matter how busy you are, sit down and look carefully at the profiles, study, analyze, until you find three guys that you really like. It sounds very utilitarian, but periodic “forays” into the app are unlikely to lead to results if it’s important to you. Keep in mind the theory of probability and be aware that the more sincere likes you put, the higher the chance that one of these people may be your mate for life. By the way, contrary to popular belief, such applications aren’t a way to meet exclusively for one night. There are a lot of couples who got married when they met in the app, and a lot of girls who just over the past year have met a perfect partner on Tinder.
SHOW THE INITIATIVE
Just like in real life, there are fewer good guys on the dating app than great single girls. The perfect guy for you will definitely interest not only you, but he’ll also show sympathy for a dozen other young ladies. In the Message stream, the notification of a new pair may simply be lost. So don’t wait – write first. It’s absolutely normal here, and moreover, it’ll definitely meet with approval from him. Be demanding of yourself when thinking through your first message. Make a compliment, comment on some of his photos, or make a joke. It takes a lot of emotional energy, but it’s definitely better than sitting in a bar waiting for a drunken married man to come up to you – just remember that. So you wrote, he replied – and you liked what you read. Well, plan for yourself a certain algorithm for such situations – for example, specify the points that are important to you immediately, or discuss some topic that interests you, but don’t stretch the conversation for several days. If a person has hooked you, offer to meet for coffee or an evening cocktail.
ANALYZE THE CANDIDATE
If the exchange of the first messages went well and there’s a desire to meet, first casually suggest him moving the communication to social networks. Choose the one that is most revealing to you. The profile in the dating app is still not so much to understand. But the page in the social network will give you almost all the necessary information. Analyze everything: photos, wall posts, and user information. It doesn’t sound very pleasant, but it’s better to do such a check, sitting in the safety of the house, than to find out some nuances that aren’t quite pleasant for you after the first dates.
Consider the theory of probability and believe that that one of the guys you go on a date with will be your favorite and dearest one day – perhaps the one with whom you drink coffee today.
DON’T BE LAZY
As you take this rational dating path through the app, try to persuade yourself not to be lazy in advance, hide your introverted side in the closet and free up time – in the coming months, you’ll go on three dates a week. Yes, it’s difficult to go to a meeting with a stranger over and over again, having a conversation and answering all the same questions… At some point, you’ll want to hide from everyone in a cozy sink, and you’ll start canceling dates one by one at the last moment – it’s a normal reaction of your psyche to endless “interviews”. At this moment, try to remember your goal.
PREPARE ESCAPE ROUTES
If you don’t like the guy at the meeting, then you need to think about the most convenient escape routes. The option that makes you feel less embarrassed. For example: if you realize immediately at a meeting or after the first phrases that the person will definitely not be interesting to you and, moreover, he is already unpleasant – quickly inform him that you have an urgent meeting in half an hour. Before this phrase, you can look at the phone, as if reading an important message. Another option that girls have been using for centuries on unsuccessful dates is a “friend rescue” method. Just write your friend a message asking her to call, and then, having already picked up the phone, pop your eyes out as much as possible and yell: “What are you doing? I’m on my way!” And regretfully inform the partner that your friend is in trouble, and only you can help.
GIVE A SECOND CHANCE
Of course, it doesn’t apply to situations where you immediately see for sure that a person is unpleasant to you. But on the first date, consider all nuances – in what mood you are, tired or not. Give the other person a break – he may have had a very difficult day. And if there’s sympathy for some points, but something is still wrong – don’t rush to put an end to it. Wait a week, exchange messages, and meet again. The second date will be more relaxed, and the first impression of the week will settle down and form more clearly for you.
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