Just One Look Changed My Whole Life… Like I am a Newborn!
I am 23 years old and I didn’t know that I’ll get the moment that will change my life as I am New-born!
In 2017, The Day of 23rd of December Changed my whole life, my thinking, my lifestyle, in fact, the whole terminology of life. About a year ago, I was a girl who never looks at anybody with a soft eye. I was a girl who never compromised of anything & never down my head in respect to somebody. I always thought that I can achieve everything that I want. I walked over the moon’s surface. My arrogance was on peak point.
One day, I fell in love! The incredible …that feeling was on fire. Life became more interesting than I thought, My studies were going wonderful, I was getting achieve many awards towards my aims. I felt life is perfect!
But a sudden, I don’t know what happened, I lost everything slowly and gradually I was missing the rope of my life to my hands. My degree program was stuck in the middle because of the management’s issues, I got very low marks in my thesis. I lost my friends these days, I had a conflict with my father and the worst thing I had a break-up!
I never thought that I’ll face this type of time period in my life, I mean how? for me? Was it possible? Everything like a Parlous dream. What was happening to me? Why? I couldn’t catch my mistake — I felt everything was over I was finished!
Life is terrible…
I was in the dark black sea, I was sinking and couldn’t take a breath, Here & there I didn’t have anybody who support me, who hold my hands to save my life from drowning, who told me where I made mistake? I sat on my couch everytime asking this question to myself, I completely locked myself in my home I cut my links to my social circle. My heart was not pumping, my brain was not working properly. Just one question collapsed to my tongue again & again that why & how?
At that time, My mother came to me & asked, Would you join me for Umrah? your father and I are going to perform. Should you come with us? I don’t know but it was my last hope for searching myself, And I said yes!
24th of December’2017
The day when I was entering in Makkah(the most prestigious place). And I was walking towards the Khana e Kaaba to perform Umrah, On my every step, my heartbeat was pumping so fast, my eyes were not looking who was around but the picture of my whole life was screening in front of my eyes.
My rude behavior, my arrogance, my disrespect for elders, my teasing moments to my family, my every single mistake I was looking at the picture in front of my eyes. What did I do? Oh, GOD! What did I do with me?
At the moment, when I reached in front of the Khana e Kaaba, The first look forgotten me everything, I just looked & was continuously looking. In a little while, a thousand colors of emotions touched my heart frequently.
- Love
- Fear
- Sin
- Thanks
- Affection
- Attraction
- Forgiveness
- Hope
- Light
- Listener
- Supporter
- I am not alone
- Still, I have a chance to renew my life
- Someone who like me with my imperfections
And there are much more emotions that I can never elaborate in a few words. My arrogance completely ends up. I was not weeping actually I was crying, my all mistakes appeared on me. Just one look changed me in split seconds! my father held me & gave a hand to perform Umrah.
When I returned back, I felt I am newborn! I realized, What we face the reactions its completely depends on our actions. So, I returned with a new hope to love, to help, to behave respectfully I was back just like a little grain of sand.
20th January’2018
I was at home, My studies issues solved, my family conflict converted into support, my degree program completed, I got my degree of BS in Media Sciences, my job & career started to shine, I needn’t anybody for making love interest.
I started to help others, to love children, to make out some money for beggars. I made myself a scaffolding for others career. I don’t know why but if someone felt happy to me so It made me happy too! I experienced I am now a human before this I was an animal.
Now, Everyone is happy to me, no one has a single complaint. My life is going superb & I am satisfied. After realizing that why we are arrogant? In fact, we are nothing, we don’t have any right in our own life. So, why we act like we are king? Even, Simplicity makes life easier, just one smile, a good behavior, help, support, these are the orders from our GOD. This is not hard to do it, So, If someone doesn’t want to fall to Sky because of arrogance like me, Leave your attitude as an animal, behave like a humble human being— -Just do it and see what happens with you!
Just One Look Changed My Whole Life…Like I am a Newborn! was originally published in The Ascent on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
