Whether you believe it or not, life changes as it keeps rolling. It’s not moving that fast tho, it is just us who wants to see it as so, which helps us find excuses to all the moments we missed and all the upcoming ones that we are gonna miss. Well, bad news: those were actually all our faults. Life offers multiple train rides instead of one. When you miss one, there are always gonna be more coming up. Although, even if you managed to catch your train and get your life on its track, there will be junctions, where you should hop-off to discover new and possibly better paths. If you always stick to your own, you will always know as much- as John Snow. It’s like traveling the world with Trip Advisor. Sure you’ll find the best hotels, go to the best restaurants in town and probably see the Eiffel Tower, Statue of Liberty, British Museum and so on. But you’ll never know what other things are out there waiting for you which the majority didn’t discover yet. Anyway back to what I was saying…
In our lives, monotony starts taking over at some point and it just sucks all of our excitement. Right after we felt the presence of it, most of us start searching alternative paths which could lead us to new environments or new people or even new habits. Well, in general focus is mostly on 2 things; A new life or a new self. Let’s be honest about it because Google is crowded with these search inquiries. Finding solutions will be the easiest step. The real challenge is their application, which means getting out of our Comfort Zone and change our current path.
Here is what most people prefer to do:
Finding gifted real-life heroes who accomplish their goals and live their dreams, then be happy for those heroes while complaining about how unlucky they are and still doing nothing about it. It’s because most people are afraid of taking the very first step, since they know taking the first step will drag them in a new life. For those risk avoiders, I feel sorry everyday for being stuck on the first chapter .
Wise men say that people don’t chan — .
Just ignore this nonsense and keep searching the best version of you!
Now that I blew this wind of change this much, let me define “the change” so the audience may understand which actions of ours should be counted and which shouldn’t. And NO! Switching between Apple and Samsung doesn’t count, even they seem like a huge step in our lives. Still, it’s may be a good start for those of you, who are really scared to disturb any of the dominos on the ground. Just be aware that those who can dare to disturb them are more resistable to earthquakes.
What I really meant by the change was supposed to be something like touching on one point on the surface of the water. Even you only touch on one single point it affects all the river. As you can guess, the river stands for your life and that magical touch is not your thoughts but your actions that are going to change your whole life somehow.
Yes by thinking you are already halfway there, but without your actions, you will never reach to the end of the road to see what’s waiting for you.
I’m not telling you not to believe in positive thinking, I’m just saying that without any solid action, the other half of the glass won’t fill itself.
I’m sure most of us keep saying that they are going to do things differently after some time. After an unsuccessful business, series of failed classes, losing a loved one, a serious break-up, college graduation, or any other happiest and saddest moment in our lives that force us to think about a radical change.
Since our imaginations are all wild enough we don’t face any challenge while dreaming lot better lives for ourselves. Unfortunately, our fears have way more dominant roles in our decisions and actions, that’s why we usually choose not to pursue those dreams but keep them stuck in our mind. The mindset is the window which keeps winds of change outside. What leads a clear action is believing 100% what you are about to do. You don’t have to be someone who always “dream big”. But you have to believe that you have enough power and courage to chase them whether they are big or little. Because most of the times, your dreams will be waiting for you outside of your comfort zone
We dream way too much. But we don’t believe that they may come true. They just sound too great for an average life.
I had enough significant changes in my life to say that none of these put me in a bad direction. On the contrary, each of them contributed my personality somehow whether they were wrong or right actions. Changes show us what we really want and what we may want to avoid in the future. Let’s not call it aging but getting wiser and being able to see clearer paths to your happiness.
Recently, I started another chapter in my life by moving to San Francisco and put 10 hours difference between myself and almost everyone I know. I’m looking forward to telling all the interesting stories and memories I’ll collect during my stay here, but for now, I can just say confidently that I’ll never regret this change of mine. Just like we all like bonding with new people and making some good connections, I love bonding with new places and completely different environments. It takes a complete man of the world to embrace all the existing cultures and habitats on the planet. That is one of my priority tasks which I may never complete until the end of my life and that makes it worthy of trying. Nobody likes video games which they can finish in a couple of days.
You’ll have one single home for sure, but while traveling, never be afraid to move into other places and call them home for a while. You will have best friends, but you may always have room for newcomers. You may have one job that you definitely love and attracted. Even it seems bad to lose it, always be open for new career domains. I know some psychologists who jumped into coding world with Java (Possibly one of the extreme career changes). Nobody should be afraid to change their preferences or discover new roads during their lifetime. Most importantly, you will have characteristics that you may love and you may hate. Keep the ones you loved and try to change the ones you hate step-by-step. Don’t insist on the motto “I am who I am”. Sometimes updating your software may not be a bad idea.
Here comes that cliche “old man’s advice” part that I’m gonna list the missions that everyone should accomplish at least once: Travel and then live in a place where you can get influenced by a different culture. Have a best friend who doesn’t know your native language at all. Do and keep doing at least one activity that you describe as extreme. (Helps you to overcome your fears). List the things you would love to do, then dedicate your time to do the first one. (At least your remaining time if you are a 9am-5pm person). Now you should have already noticed that one comment point is targeted which is going to solve the riddle:
Get out from your comfort zone by embracing the change
Life May Not Be A Book, But Chapters Do Exist. Don’t Get Stuck On The First One was originally published in The Ascent on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.