You don’t Deserve anything more or anything less than what you currently have. You are exactly where you should be and no wishing in the world is ever going to change that.
Everyone has the ability to get exactly what they want but they get caught up in a frame of mind where they believe everything should be handed to them. These same people never miss the chance to complain about it.
You hear it all the time and maybe you’re a culprit.
“I can’t believe that happened to me?”
“Why do they have that and I don’t?”
“That should have been me!”
Getting stuck in the frame of mind that you deserve more is a great way to set in stone the guarantee that you will never be anything other than what you are right now.
I’ve been there multiple times throughout my life.
One was when I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis. It’s hard to say whether I deserved it or not but it happened and I got into the thinking that it wasn’t fair.
Which never solved anything. In fact, it made it worse. Eventually, I started to realise this and focused on getting better and, surprise, I went into remission.
You can always change where you are or what you have. No matter how badly you’ve stuffed up, you can fix it.
There’s a simple process I follow when this happens.
Determine Where You Are
Self-awareness is critical to improving. You can’t get somewhere without knowing where you are. You need to give yourself an audit before you can move to the next stage.
Go over aspects of your life and determine what’s going well and what isn’t. Be sure to include:
These are the main ones of which people spend most of their time ‘wishing’ or complaining.
I like to treat this section like a ‘pros and cons’ list. Where I put the good on one side and the bad on the other.
From here, I get a great overview of the things I want to improve and can visualise how I want to do it.
Decide What You Want
Once you’ve determined where you are, its time to determine where you want to go.
In other words, you need to develop some goals.
A lot of the time goals are restricted to none tangible things. Like wanting to be successful or wanting to get a promotion. Which is fine but feel free to think outside of this. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to have a new car as long as you’re willing to put in the Effort to get it. I want you to remember this when choosing your goals.
You have to be willing to put in the effort. The reason why people complain about what they don’t have is because they don’t have it, and the reason they don’t have it is because they haven’t put in the work.
You can get literally anything if you’re willing to put the time and effort into getting it. This is something else you should remember. It doesn’t Happen Overnight. It could take months or even years to achieve your goals so be prepared to work for it, over a long period of time.
If you need help setting your goals, this post will help you.
Go And Get It
You’ve decided what you want and are ready to go and get it, great! You just have one more step.
It’s time to work. It’s time to go and get it!
While you develop your goals you need to develop a plan to achieve them and then the fun starts.
Whatever your plan may be, you have to actually execute.
No matter how good a plan is if you don’t actually act, it’s worthless and you’ll never get to where you want to go.
Respect the process
You need to respect the process.
As I mentioned, great things don’t happen overnight. The time is in some cases a lot, but at the end, you’re going to be glad you stuck with it.
The only way to guarantee you won’t reach your goals is to quit.
Once you quit, it’s game over. You will never reach that goal.
Stick to it stay persistent and stay consistent.
I just told you the need to stay persistent. The reason being is there’s no way of telling when you’ll reach your goals.
Sure you can guess but there’s no actual way of knowing. If you work really hard for 1 year and after that, you decide that it’s impossible, I promise you would have reached your goal on the 366th day of chasing your goals.
Remember one thing:
Getting where you want to be is just one more day away.
Don’t ever stop.
Leave a comment and tell me what your goals are! I want to hear them.
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You Are Exactly Where You Deserve To Be: Here’s How To Get More was originally published in The Ascent on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.