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Floating On A Magic Carpet
2023-10-27 16:35
Saturday 21st October, and we were surfing on the coattails of Storm Babet that had dumped a shitload of rain on the region before pressing on northwards to bring death, destruction, floodin… Read More
Subliminal Sub-Bimble
2023-10-13 16:10
Another infrequent, intermittent, and wholly erratic despatch from the club run front lines – I think we now have enough evidence to conclude that any hopes that the new unpredictabil… Read More
A Small Vibration In The Old Crank
2023-08-25 17:16
Saturday was the third Gavin Husband Memorial Ride held in remembrance of our clubmate and friend who sadly died four years ago following a cardiac incident on the return leg of a club run h… Read More
Possibilities
2023-08-18 13:10
Well, it’s been a fun ride. Waaay back in 2015 I started this humble blerg as a self-described “50-something, remarkably undistinguished club cyclist, all-round curmudgeon, a… Read More
What Happened?
2023-06-09 14:27
With a mandatory SLJ appearance at a wedding decreed last weekend, I could only accept I’d missed the perfect Saturday for a bike ride, or … I will begrudgingly accept, found th… Read More
Barnstorming
2023-05-26 20:19
It was another chilly start with the promise of bright sunshine later in the day, so once again I set out in a light, windproof jacket, and arm warmers, only this time I’d learned from… Read More
Tractor And Verse
2023-05-19 16:20
The weekend before I’d spent in Ambleside, avoiding all the Chuck 3 profligacy and ridiculousness, while taking in a few walks to use sets of muscles I don’t normally stress. I d… Read More
Giddy
2023-05-05 16:57
Dry but very chilly weather at least gave us a break from all the horrible and wet Saturdays we seem to be enduring lately and the conditions were good enough to tempt a few more riders to o… Read More
2023-04-28 11:05
Don’t tell me we’re back to that always raining on Saturday malarkey. I thought we’d done with that? But no, apparently not. This weather would have made for a trul… Read More
2023-04-21 16:41
Au revoir Pug, the time has come to retire the Peugeot from active, front-line duty. The frame is starting to look tired, is blistering in places and its been ridden to death and back on my… Read More
Picking Up The Gauntlet
2023-04-14 16:31
Sunny, yesterday my life was filled with rain. The Easter weekend brought a change in the weather and broke the long streak of successive rainy Saturdays. I can’t help feeling we&rs&hell…Read More
String Theory
2023-04-12 17:47
Saturday morning. Again. Club run. Again. Rain showers. Again. Naturally. So, rinse and repeat. Literally. Ugh. So, here we go again then rain jacket on and heading out th… Read More
Premature Heartburn
2023-03-31 17:42
In what is fast becoming something of an unwelcome 2023 tradition, Saturday morning was once again marred by heavy rain showers. This time they struck just as I started downhill and had me p… Read More
Tangoed!
2023-03-24 22:31
So, a fortnight ago I set off for the usual club ride, dropped down the hill and was pushing along the valley when the Frankenbike developed a very annoying tic in the form of a very annoyin… Read More
A-La-La-La-La-Long
2023-03-03 17:22
Short. Sharp. Shocked. I was halfway down the hill, scowling at the bad weather when a burst of hail and icy rain suddenly engulfed me and blew straight through my light rain jacket. I w… Read More
No Honky Ride!
2023-02-24 12:16
This week we found ourselves dancing around the remnants of Storm Otto for a bit of added attrition. This was most obviously manifest in turning the Tyne Valley into a ferocious wind tunnel… Read More
Bicycle Thieves
2023-02-17 18:25
We have a late entry in the outsize packaging competition, so thanks Wiggle – not quite up to the standards of Bikester, but pretty impressive nonetheless. At least I won the Haribo lo… Read More
Rolling Stones
2023-02-10 17:49
A promisingly dry day for a ride was somewhat belied by the faintest hint of rain that hung in the air as I dropped down the Heinous Hill and kicked out along the valley. This thankfully fai… Read More
Huffy Room For Heaven Sailors
2023-02-03 15:22
Icicles and bicycles. They just don’t mix, so with the temperatures down to -7℃ out in the wilds of Northumberland last weekend, it was a day to preserve fragile bones and reluct… Read More
The Ride Of The Rising Octaves
2023-01-20 15:03
The rain that was forecast for Saturday apparently got the bums’ rush and passed through quicker than expected, leaving us with a relatively dry run, well, if you don’t count one… Read More
Slate
2023-01-13 16:25
2023, eh? A new year. A clean slate. I’m not holding out hope for much of an improvement on the past twelve months, so at least I’m not likely to be disappointed. Early Satur… Read More
Winter Warmer
2022-12-23 17:18
As we hurtle our way toward the shortest day of the year, I was consoled by the thought that, while it was barely dawn out on the road, this was the darkest I’d find it travelling in t… Read More
Buggering Bollocks
2022-12-09 17:56
I missed the previous week’s ride as the club had arranged and paid for an emergency first-aid course – a mandatory, British Cycling requirement for those who are, or would like… Read More
The Trouble With Garibaldi’s
2022-11-18 18:36
Well, the previous Saturday didn’t go at all to plan. I managed to prise myself out of bed, despite the rain and cold and set off on the single-speed with a degree of hopeful optimism… Read More
Between The Saggy And The Soggy
2022-11-04 17:28
In what I took to be another indicator of fast approaching winter, the Canada Geese that spend their summer splashing noisily around Shibdon Pond were organising for departure, their dyslexi… Read More
The King Of Wishful Thinking
2022-10-28 17:19
Hello again. It’s been a while hasn’t it, because, well … life. And it’s certainly been a long while if you measure time in the lifespan of Tory chancellors… Read More
The Pendulum Swings
2022-09-09 16:17
As if a switch has been flipped, we’ve moved seamlessly from constant, bright blue skies to overcast and a slow fade to grey. As I dropped down the Heinous Hill it prompted me to run t… Read More
White Van Man And The Turbo-Nutter Bastard
2022-08-27 09:45
Well back to a normal club run affairs after a mischievous and thoroughly enjoyable dabbling with time trials. Well, almost back to normal. This weekend marked the sombre, 2nd anniversary of… Read More
Pearly-Dewdrops’ Drops
2022-08-19 17:06
Early Saturday and after days of a stifling heatwave (typically anything above 20℃ in the North East of England is considered extreme) it was quite pleasant to find myself descending t… Read More
Clickbait
2022-08-12 11:12
Missed me? Nah, thought not. Anyway since my last load of wild, incoherent blerg ramblings I’ve packed in a family holiday, sans velo, and then last Saturday didn’t participa… Read More
Chevauchée Des Alpes 3
2022-07-13 17:54
Day#4 – The Point of Return Ornon or Ornoff For a final act we’d chosen the Col d’Ornon, around 11km long with an average gradient just over 6%. It wasn’t a par… Read More
Chevauchée Des Alpes 3
2022-07-01 16:43
Day#1 – Planes, Chains and Automobiles It’s a truly ungodly hour, 4.10am, Thursday 16th June. The sun is barely above the horizon yet and I’ve already been up for more t… Read More
The Odd Scent Of Grapefruit
2022-06-15 16:42
Cat#2 demanded to be let out of the back door first thing Saturday morning (he has a catflap, but it’s sooo much effort and besides, what else are stoopid humans good for?) and while a… Read More
Leaden Legged
2022-06-10 16:09
You probably wouldn’t be surprised to learn that I have no time for the utterly horrendous, archaic and anachronistic, entitled, greedy, unaccountable, elitist human beings that compos… Read More
Breakaways
2022-06-03 17:27
This is becoming something of a theme, the weather on Saturday was warm (again), occasionally bright (again) and a bit blustery (again). We’re in danger of having remarkably consistent… Read More
2022-05-27 18:29
So, for an idea of the weather, take last week’s, but add a little more cloud and then take last week’s wind and add a whole lot more. A pleasant enough day, but a bit blowy… Read More
Fly Blown
2022-05-20 16:47
Oops! … I did it again. I didn’t learn the lesson last week, so was enticed into the front group again this week, for an even faster run, (although, to be fair this route inv… Read More
Ice Cream For Crow
2022-05-13 17:13
Ooph! What just happened? On Saturday I completed my longest ride of the year while still managing to get home half an hour before I usually would. Logic dictates then that I must have… Read More
Rama-Llama-Ding-Dong, Or Phil-Gil-Hill
2022-05-06 16:25
For this week’s weather read last week’s, but add a couple of degrees here and there, and for this week’s variable temperature layering-strategy also read last week’s… Read More
2022-04-29 17:04
With the weather a few degrees warmer but essentially following the same pattern as last Saturday, it was a case of repeating last week’s successful layering strategy to get me through… Read More
Noodle Legs
2022-04-22 15:39
The trick today was to get the layers about right as the morning was decidedly chilly, but there were hopes temperatures might nudge into double figures by the afternoon. G-Dawg had decreed… Read More
Pavlov’s Dogs
2022-04-15 18:07
Cold, but bright and mainly dry, it was another day when we could risk breaking out the summer bikes. At the meeting point, James III was wrestling impotently with his gloves as he suffer… Read More
2022-04-08 16:58
Well, I guess we had to pay for the fine, fine weather last week. And we did. The altitudinous uplands of Whickham received more than a smattering of snow on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday a… Read More
Winter Doors?
2022-04-01 17:08
Well, looks like Mother Nature has a heart after all. After missing a ride out in the glorious weather a week ago, we got an almost exact replica of conditions this week and a rare, early op… Read More
Positives And Negatives
2022-03-25 20:03
I managed to catch a vicious throat infection which kept me off the bike last weekend just as the weather turned momentarily glorious. While COVID infections continue to rise at an alarming… Read More
2022-03-20 20:57
Back to a more normal start time this week and I wasn’t long into the ride when I realised the forecast for a dry day had surprise, surprise, got it wrong. I persevered for a while, ho… Read More
Holding Pattern
2022-03-11 17:46
An early start was on the cards this week as I did a bit of (unofficial) club kit delivery prior to the ride. This saw me leaving the house 30 minutes ahead of my normal departure to give my… Read More
Tales Of The Unexpected
2022-03-04 18:19
Here we go again, one more Saturday, one more opportunity to bash the pedals around ceaslessly and see how tired I can make myself. By the time I was threading my way around multiple lane… Read More
Gown Of Thorns
2022-02-25 17:33
More storms and the latest, Storm Eunice, gifted us a smattering of snow to nicely frame the newly arrived snowdrops in the garden. Sadly these are not the variety that recently sold for &po&hell…Read More
Immaculate Construction
2022-02-18 18:59
Following last week’s travails, I was aiming to complete the entirety of the next club ride, or at least make it as far as the all-important café stop, so the plan was to press… Read More
Chirpy, Chirpy, Cheep, Cheep
2022-02-11 19:44
Where will we goWhen di quarantine ting done and everybody touch road? I always like to start with a little Koffee. Just a bit disappointed no one ambushed me with cake. So that&rsquo&hell…Read More
2022-01-21 18:34
Into a new year we stumble and it’s back to the Saturday routine following two consecutive Monday rides during the holidays. The first of these would put a cap on my 2021 efforts in tr… Read More
2021-12-17 17:38
I started the day with perhaps the slowest ever descent off the Heinous Hill in the cold, damp and dark of Saturday morning, as I found myself catching and then trailing a massive JCB with b… Read More
2021-12-10 18:49
After a lost weekend spent infiltrating Thing#1 into London, I was looking forward to getting back to the sanctuary and serenity of a club run, only to have my intentions cruelly dashed by S… Read More
Absolutely Conkers
2021-11-19 18:02
Another Saturday, another club ride, but I have to admit I just wasn’t feeling it. The legs felt tired and heavy right from the outset. Dropping down the hill and pushing out along the… Read More
Proxy Dick
2021-11-12 18:09
The club run this week was planned by Richard of Flanders and included some serious hills. By the end I’d managed to clock up over 100 kilometres, with more than 1,200 metres of climbi… Read More
Danish Poirot
2021-11-05 18:33
Well, we’ve successfully completed our grand tour of many fine northern cities and their splendid universities and while I’m not sure Thing#2 has reached any sort of decision, w… Read More
Tokin’ Love
2021-10-08 17:04
The seasons might be a man-made abstract, but this Saturday definitely felt like we’d crossed some sharp divide and, as British Summer Time officially came to an end and we nudged int… Read More
2021-09-18 15:52
I can’t say I’m at all happy with the Tour of Britain organisers, after excelling themselves by channelling the 2019 edition right past my front door, they decided to spoil thing… Read More
2021-09-10 17:00
Buckle up, it’s a twofer! So, the week before last I had yet another birthday, which is a bit strange since it’s only seems a year or so since the previous one. Anyway, belate… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#74 – Hokey Cokey
2021-08-20 17:42
Another less than stellar summer day, but rain was only a possibility not an eventuality so it would more than do. The roads were quiet on my way across to the meeting point and the river wa… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#72 – Droond Rats
2021-08-06 18:52
So, back from holiday, back to a Saturday club run and, yes, back to crap weather and unrelenting rain. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. The forecast suggested light, intermitte… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#68 – Gemini Feed
2021-07-10 16:13
It was the Cyclone sportive this weekend, but there didn’t seem much appetite for a mass-participation event that would allow gasping strangers to breathe all over you, even if it was… Read More
2021-07-02 16:19
Just case all the fine weather of the past few weeks was in danger of making us soft, we were served up a real stinker this Saturday, a constant, miserable rain that didn’t so much as… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#62 – Gang Of Four
2021-05-28 16:50
With the UK on track for the wettest May on record, Saturday looked intent on adding to total rainfall with a wet and windy start, despite the BBC weather app assuring me it would be overcas… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#61 – Sixes And Sevens
2021-05-21 11:18
A better day all round, cool but never cold and while mostly grey, the clouds had the good manners to hold back any actual rain. It would do, it was a far cry from last weeks meteorological… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#59 – Bumping Uglies
2021-05-07 17:35
Saturday found me up and out early for, barring catastrophic bike failure, an early rendezvous with Crazy Legs to hand over his new long-sleeved jersey. This item was rolled into a tight cyl… Read More
2021-04-29 17:21
Given (to my mind) the onerous task of devising a route for this week’s ride, at the coffee stop last week Crazy Legs had felt impelled to resurrect our Classic Club Café sprin… Read More
Plague Diaries Week#57 – Altered Carbon
2021-04-23 11:09
With a week off before starting my new job, on Wednesday I played the good clubmate and set up to deliver a batch of new (unofficial) jerseys to four of our number. Door-to-door delivery by… Read More
Sprung – Plague Diaries Week#56
2021-04-16 16:13
Its me again, Face you forever gonna see again, Never been scared of none of dem,No problem, I’m come, come again… Photo by William Eickler on Pexels.com Hmmm. Kind of qui… Read More
Plague Diaries # Week 36
2020-11-27 16:52
Lockdown Edition. So, here we are, reaching the end of a second lockdown which, even with the most generous interpretation came along at least 3 weeks too late. Again. Meanwhile… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#33
2020-11-12 18:48
I hear the sound of an abundance of rain … Dear Lord, I’m getting tardy with these things and I’m running about a week behind. Busy times, folks … Anyway, her… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#32
2020-11-02 17:30
Rinse & Repeat Another weekend and this time the weather forecast wasn’t toying with us, but had gone for the nuclear option – a 73% chance of heavy rain showers from 9.00… Read More
Plague Diaries #Week 31
2020-10-23 18:49
Against the Odds A year that’s already been grim and dark and difficult took an even blacker turn last weekend when my Dad died. Dad, Grandad, husband, brother, son, uncle, rugby pl… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#26
2020-09-18 19:57
The Joy of Six Woah! Week#26 of this stuff already – half an entire year and still no end in sight. Oh, if you’re at all concerned at the loss of week#24 and #25, they were… Read More
2020-08-23 12:16
Yesterday, Saturday 22nd August, during a club run, one of my club mates and a friend suffered a heart-attack and sadly passed in hospital that night. Thoughts are with his friends and f… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#22
2020-08-21 17:49
Seven Nation Army What a mizzly, horrible start to the day. The cloud was low over the hills, weeping fine drizzle in enough volume that I kicked a rooster tail of spray off my rear wheel… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#21
2020-08-13 16:50
A quick one. In all senses of the word. Once again the North East missed out on the raging heatwave and produced perfect cycling weather for the Saturday run, dry, bright and sunny, but n… Read More
2020-08-05 19:55
Ponderosa Glee Boys Internet oddity of the week was a report in multiple newspapers that Safari park baboons had been armed with knives, screwdrivers and a chainsaw, with keepers suspecti… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#19
2020-07-31 16:43
[With special bonus feature, incorporating the Plague Diaries – Week#18!] Grupo Compacto Avid and astute SLJ readers (is there actually such a thing, I wonder?) may have noted n… Read More
Week 17
2020-07-15 17:28
One a Dem Internet oddity of the week came from reading about a medical scare in late Victorian Britain that saw doctors warning women about the deleterious effect vigorous cycling would… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#16
2020-07-06 21:03
The Lone Bellow While idly meandering through various social media (mediums?) this week, this picture was perhaps the most arresting that I came across … And I quite liked the a… Read More
The Plague Diaries – Week#15
2020-06-30 19:18
On Me Tod So, more relaxation of the lockdown rules and, according to the Daily Heil Mail at least, it’s all going swimmingly. Well, as long as you don’t mention Liverpool foo… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#14
2020-06-23 16:58
The Odyssey Saturday promised to be a most splendid day for piloting a bike around a suitably sunny and bucolic Northumberland and, with the SLJ household all out and about, I had the ent… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#13
2020-06-16 17:19
Binary Choices Well, this weekend was supposed to mark our annual pilgrimage to a random mountain range in Europe to test just how slowly an ageing man can cycle up their slopes. This ye… Read More
2020-06-08 21:28
The Sign of Six I learned this week that there are not always two side to every argument and occasionally some things are just so wrong that they’re completely indefensible. Mean… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#11
2020-05-31 18:14
I Am The One and Only So, in their infinite wisdom, the British Government is intent on relaxing lock-down rules, perhaps not based on any grand plan, but simply trying to create the illu… Read More
Love At First Bike
2020-05-28 17:59
A guest blog by Tony Clay Some people remember and like to reminisce about their first love, the smallest details recalled with pinpoint accuracy, burned and burnished in vivid, Kodachrom… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#10
2020-05-24 19:13
The Tranquillity of Solitude *** NOTE: OFFICIALLY, THIS NEVER HAPPENED *** Ok, now I know that last weeks stiff breeze was just a prelude, a dress rehearsal and a precursor for the mai… Read More
Plague Diaries – Week#9
2020-05-18 17:13
Solitude Standing Well UK lock-down conditions have been eased, somewhat chaotically and confusingly, but eased nonetheless. In real terms it makes no difference to the viability of group… Read More

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