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Frank and Bob: Breakups

Frank: She broke it off me with me Bob, Karen dumped me.

Bob: That sucks man, but even in the rainiest rainstorm, shimmers a the Purple Cloud.

Frank: What in the world are you talking about? Silvering lining I get, but purple cloud?

Bob: Simply put, you don’t have the need to fake it anymore. You can be who you always were meant to be.

Frank: I liked who I was with Karen. I mean sure, I was neurotic and little jealous at times, but I was happy.

Bob: I’m not talking about that. I’m referring to the fact that you’re gay, you my friend are the purple cloud.

Frank: Bob, I’m not gay. We went over this.

Bob: No less than 10 comics ago, you started dropping subtle hints like gumdrops. I followed that gumdrop trail, and it led me to rainbow road. Don’t push your true feelings aside Frank. I’m not going to date you, mostly because I’m not gay. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t stop wearing lipgloss.

Frank: Dammit Bob! I’m not gay! I’ve never been attracted to you, and that lip gloss you thought I was wearing? That was chapstick.

Bob: I don’t judge people based on their makeup choices Frank. I just thought it was a little weird how you got jealous when Karen would hang out with her guy friends.

Frank: Sorry for bursting out, I know that being jealous is something I need to work on.

Bob: Don’t work on it, accept it! It’s okay for you to be jealous of Karen. Her guy friends were good looking, you deserve to be with a guy like that.

Frank: Bob, I’m not jealous of Karen. And like I’ve said a thousand times, I’m not gay. Although, your “guy friends were good looking” comment has me thinking some things about you.

Bob: Oh, I’m sorry Frank. Is it wrong that I’m secure enough in my sexuality to admit that another man may be good looking?

Frank: I’m sorry man. This breakup is just making me a little depressed. And when I’m not blaming myself for the ending of my relationship, I fall into this revolving cycle of self-hatred and self-doubt.

Bob: I know man. Breakups fucking suck. Want to come watch TV?

Frank: That sounds really good. Thank you man

Bob:  What else are bro’s for? I love you man.

Frank: I love you too man.

Bob: Please Frank, you’re not fooling anyone.

This post first appeared on Frank And Bob, please read the originial post: here

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Frank and Bob: Breakups


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