I recently went out to Dinner at one of those very woke restaurants I usually avoid, but the dinner was to celebrate my husband's birthday and he is supremely awake. This restaurant is so woke that before you even enter they want you to know, so they posted this sign the front door:

But wait! It says nothing about all ages, or all heights or all weights! What about a short, fat old lady? Is she welcome? Or a skinny old man? Could someone too tall get in? How about poor people? They like to eat too. Or the homeless? The mentally ill? How about the hideously ugly, like maybe someone who had been disfigured in a fire, or even on 9/11?

I was so disgusted at the blatant lack of generosity towards all the underprivileged people I could hardly eat my expensive little plates filled with unfamiliar foods in strange combinations. I sure hope they fix that sign soon to include everyone.