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Falling in love with a pokemon

Well r9k Ive noticed there have not been a lot of good greentext, so Im going to get started with one of my own that Ive been dying to type up. 
Friends, this is the story of how I fell in Love with a pokemon 
>be me  
>be 16 
>dramafag, at state thespian festival 
>pretty depressed, tried to kill myself at this same festival just one year ago. 
>walking around with a friend of mine 
>suddenly approached by girl, 
>hands me note, then leaves 
It looks like you lost your #number, need mine? -insert number here- 
>first time a girl has flirted with me 
>be beta, decide to immediately text girl 
>we start talking 
>didnt get a good look at her, she left quickly 
>lets call her Gardevoir 
>there is a dance to celebrate the end of the festival that night 
>splooge and invite her out to it 
>Gardevoir accepts 
>hell yeah! 
>tell my friend about conversation 
>Oh shit dude, youre getting laid tonight! 
>Panic! At the disco 
>could this be how I lose my virginity? 
>could my life get any better! 
>what if it sucks? 
>what if I hate sex?  
>what if I regret it? 
>Tell him nah, Ill probably not get laid 
>Not with that attitude. cmon! there is a cvs down the road, lets get you some condoms 
>Hesitantly, I go to CVS 
>get condoms, I insist on not too big (my dick is on the small size) but my friend buys me the XLs 
>get back to the hotel  
>get ready for dance 
>borrow my friends purple shirt (I was a dumbass and forgot to bring more than one dress shirt) 
>go to dance with friend 
>text Gardevoir 
>where should we meet? 
>she says by one of the rooms 
>go there 
Im pretyping this, so cont. 

>forget what she looks like 
>look around like an idiot for a couple minutes 
>realize shes right behind me, giggling at my stupidity 
>Im an idiot 
>good luck tonight says my friend 
>muster up all the strength in the world to punch that fucker in the jaw 
>he leaves with his girlfriend to go to dancefloor  
>take a good look at gardevoir for a minute 
>9/10, Hispanic, from Miami, thick black hair, beautiful brown eyes 
>get nervous 
>realize shes way out of my league 
>Im 4/10, scrawny, jet black hair, huge ass nose  
>worst of all shes taller than me 
>we hit it off, I meet some of her friends 
>we go into one of the show rooms 
>look at some of the tech events 
>she complains that her friend didnt get critics choice (essentially best in show) 
>we exit the showroom 
>we go to meet some of Gardevoirs other friends 
>this short girl approaches me 
>for the sake of the story, lets call her Pikachu, since her name was very similar to a certain Pokémon 
>Pikachu grabs my name tag 
>Look at her strangely 
>Oh, I just wanted to learn your name 

>shes kind of annoying, I think to myself 
>sit down on couch with Gardevoirs friends 
>talk about shit, I make some terrible pun about the difference between stereo and mono (I love puns btw) 
>only one person gets it 
>I feel like an outcast in this group 
>Gardevoir wants everyone to go to the dancefloor to look for her cousin 
>think to myself last time I was on that dancefloor, it nearly drove me to throw myself off a balcony 
>anxiety man 
>protest against going onto the dancefloor 
>Pikachu doesnt want to go to the dancefloor either 
>Gardevoir and her friends prepare to leave Pikachu 
>thats kind of a bitch move 
>they leave 
>Im left with Pikachu 
>we start talking 
>talk about age of ultron 
>she isnt as bad as I thought 
>try to teach her how to play poker without any cards 
>she doesnt get it 
>she shows me her collection of buttons 
>Gardevoir returns, with her cousin and friends 
For the next part of the story to make sense, keep in mind I met her cousin early that day in a stage combat workshop, he was my sparring partner. Lets call him gengar. 
>A wild gengar appears 
>I like you man, but if you dont stay away from Gardevoir, Ill have to fight you 
>I think hes joking, trying to get me to show off our mad skillz we learned 
>Hell yeah man, lets throw down! 
>Gardevoir stifles a laugh 
>Suddenly, I realize this isnt a joke 
>Im about to get my ass kicked 
>Somehow convince him to not beat me to a pulp (to this day I have no idea how I did it) 
>Gardevoir and Gengar go away again 
>Im stuck with pika 
>My friend from earlier returns with his girlfriend and another friend of his. I just realized hell probobly appear again, so lets call him Charizard 
>Charizard plops down next to me 
>Immediately tries to undermine any chance I have with pika 
>You know he has a condom in his wallet, right? 
>Awkwardly explain away the condom 
>She laughs 
>Crisis averted 

>Our gaggle decides to head outside 
>It was at this point when I first got a good look at pika 
>She was short, cute little glasses, huge boobs, brown hair, gorgeous eyes 
>10/10 in my book 
Tbh, I actually like girls with small boobs. They seem to be very self-conscious and I just love to make them feel good about themselves when I compliment them. Is that because Im a faggot? Probably. 
>We continue talking 
>Its actually going quite well, this girl is not completely repulsed by me 
>In fact she shows an interest! 
>Charizard shows her some videos of us Fucking around in the hotel room earlier 
>We all laugh our asses off 
>Its getting late 
>We have to get back to the hotel 
>Ask her for her number 
>Hey can I have your number too? 
>Its Charizards friend 
>Charizard practically grabs her by the ear 
>He berates her for almost ruining my chances 
>I look on her name tag 
>Oh, you live in Miami? 
>Miami is so far... 
>Maybe Ill never see her again 
>Emotion runs over me 
>Get her number 
>Hug her 
>Walk away, back to the hotel 
>I still remember looking back, seeing her watching us walk away in the middle of the Convention Center 
>I should have run back 
>I should have grabbed her, and kissed her, and never let her go 
>I should have stayed 
>But I didnt 
>I would give anything in the world to go back to that moment and just... >just... 
>Be there 
>I get back to the hotel and promptly go to sleep 
>2 grills phone numbers in one day 
>Wake up the next day 
>Get on the bus 
>I text her 
> yeah yeah I know you should wait before just texting a girl you met, but I was young and an idiot so dont blame me 
>Hey, you seem like a nice person, I enjoyed talking to you last night 
>Thanks, you too! 

>we talk for a while on the bus ride back, about all kinds of things 
>she has tons of animals, apparently one time she named and raised a pig but then her family ate it at a barbecue 
>she eventually gets sleepy and says shell text me later 
>listen to music on the way back 
>get home 
>around 5 she texts me saying shes up 
>we talk more, I ask her about how many siblings she has 
>2 she says 
>How old are they? 
>3 and 6 (or 11, depending on how you look at it) 
>I assume she means her Sister has a mental age of around six 
>ask her what she means by this 
>My sister died 5 years ago when she was 6 from a brain tumor 
>the conversation stops after this 
>next day she texts me 
>says she shouldnt have brought up such a depressing topic 
>tell her its fine 
>she asks me to play truth or dare (but without the dare) 
>basically she wants to get to know me 
>we talk for a while 
>eventually, before she goes to bed I ask one more question 
>If I lived closer, would you go out with me? 


>I dont see why not 
>fall asleep happily 
>Fast forward a couple months 
>weve been talking about once or twice a week 
>I meet some of her friends 
>theyre pretty chill 
>we skype too 
>her voice is the cutest thing ever 
>shes Cuban, so she has this adorable little lisp sometimes 
>oh, and shes fluent in Spanish 
>One night, were texting 
>I tell her about how Im lonely  
>Dont be lonely, Im here 
>we end up being all cutesy and cuddly over text 
>even though there was no physical contact, this felt like the closest I had ever been to a girl 
>I just wanted to hold her in my arms, and squeeze her tight 
>did I mention how cute she is? 
>Anyways, being the sperglord I am, I manage to fuck it all up 
>My heart lies in Miami I say to her 
>Her reply is a simple surprised emoji 
>Its just that... She says 
>That hurt 
>But it was to be expected 
>Besides, I had very little intention of dating her at this point, since she lived so far away 
>Still, shes the closest girl I had 
>Even my ex-girlfriend and I were never this close when we dated 
>Hell, she wouldnt even hug me back half the time 
>scratch that, ALL the time 
>*leaves door open just a crack* Pika squeaks 
>we awkwardly finish the conversation 
>I try to forget about that night 

>Fast forward another few months 
>Summer has come and gone, Im going to be a junior and Pika is going to be a sophomore 
>We talk more often and skype too 
>We go back to school 
>One day, for drama class we have to write a play 
>I write one, show it to my friend 
>He says its the shittiest thing hes seen 
>back to the drawing board 
>decide to write a play about writing a play 
>In it, the protagonist half ass writes a play, gets shit on by his drama teacher, and then learns to be true to himself and writes a play about WWI 
>all in all, I thought it was good 
>at one part, I mentioned a friend that lived far away 
>I have a scene where we both skyped and before the main character hangs up, he slips up and says I love you 
>She ends up saying I love you too before hanging up 
>Tell pika about it 
>Pika wants to see 
>what if she hates that part 
>I skype her and we talk while she reads 
>get to the scene 
>Pika breaks it 
>Have I ever told you I love you before? 
>I love you anon.  

>I love you too 
>we laugh and joke about it 
>Pika says 
>it would be funny if we ended our skype calls like that 
>That would be funny 
>We are about to end the call  
>I love you 
>I love you too 
>and thus, a tradition was born 
>weve said those same things after every skype call weve had from then on 
>Fast forward some more 
>Its December 
>Pika and I are excited because the festival happens again in March 
>I get to see the girl of my dreams again!  
>Somehow the topic of kissing comes up 
>Get embarrassed 
>Tell her I never had my first kiss, but came close 
>She asks me about how close I came 
>Be me  
>New years eve 
>Invite my girlfriend over to my house for a party 
>Go in for a kiss 
>she pulls me back 
>looks me in the eye 
>shakes head 
Back to your regularly scheduled programming 
>Pika is sad 
>I like taking peoples first kisses, I promise to kiss you at states 
>Im pleased 
>An adorable girl wants to kiss me 
>Later, I go to watch my sisters play at her college 
>Its shitty sjw pandering crap 
>want to blow my brains out the entire time 
>We drive home, with one of my sisters friends in the car 
>Texting Pika 
>So I booked the trip to Hawaii over spring break today 
>States is over spring break 
>oh no 
>no no no no no 
>States is over spring break mom 
>Sisters friend pipes up 
>Why would you want to go there instead of Hawaii? States is SO boring 
>fuck you 
>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? Ill have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and Ive been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnt, you didnt, and now youre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Youre fucking dead, kiddo. 

>Well anon, it isnt your senior year, you can just go next year! My mom says 
>I was really looking forward to states 
>bitch friend pipes up again 
>Yeah, youll LOVE Hawaii 
>shut the fuck up you cunt 
>Hawaiis cool, but pika is amazing 
>I would rather see her for one second then live in Hawaii for a lifetime 
>I text pika that I cant go 
>Shes very depressed 
>I really want to see you again.... 
>We get home 
>Christmas is fine 
>Text her about it 
>feel bad for not getting her anything 
>New years arrives 
>Im lonley again 
>All my friends come over and we have a good time 
>Talk to pika 
>I wish I could kiss you at midnight, I have no one else to kiss 
>Me too 
>I decided to send her a video of me kissing the camera 
>cringey, I know 
>but it made her, and me, feel better 
>we skype 
>My friends and I talk to her 
>she talks about this guy 
>this one guy she met 
>lets call him Machamp 
>Machamp is in her math class 
>She was dared to kiss him at a party 
>Was his first kiss 
>She shows me texts of them being cutesy 
>He sent her a picture of him making half a heart with his hand 
>and she finishes the second half 
>was it all a ruse? 
>does she care about me at all? 
>am I just one of her playthings? 
>was she just like every other girl I fell in love with? Uncaring about me? 
>I feel terrible 
>I tell her 
>She says not to worry 
>but oh, do I worry 
>March rolls around 
>spring break is almost here  
>Decide to do something nice 
>Charizard is going to states 
>I put together a little care package 
>She loves cats, so I get her a stuffed cat 
>I get her some flowers 
>I get her a sketchbook, because she LOVES to draw 
>Shes actually pretty good, I love watching her draw pokemon sometimes 
>charizard is going to bring it to her 
>I hope he doesnt fuck it all up 
>Day of states comes 
>I give the package to charizard 
>He gets on the bus 
>Its all in his hands now 
>I text pika to make sure she has the package 
>My package 
>I had to make sure she had my package 
>This package 
>Of mine 
>And by package I mean MY DICK 
>I text pika to make sure she got it 
>no response 
>Oh no 
>shes blocked me 
>Im done 
>she hates me 
>what have I done! 
>oh wait, she just had bad reception 
>Im a dumbass 
>maybe I shouldnt be so anxious 
>She says she loved it! 
>she was so surprised and happy! 
>All is saved 
>We start talking even more 
>I decide to make a point to try to text her everyday 
>We skype some more 
>I meet some more of her friends (including machamp) 
>get an idea 
>what if I drove down to Miami and met her? 
>I could go with friends 
>it could be a summer trip 
>we could meet her friends and have a good time 
>Decide to try it 
>tell her about my plans 
>shes on board 
>hell yeah! 
>decide to plan it for over the summer 
>one last thing 
>to ask my mom 
>decide to ask her on a trip to look at a college 
>the trip comes 
>we tour the college 
>its a nice school, but I cant stop thinking about asking my mom 
>go out to dinner 
>in the middle of dinner, I ask her 
>she laughs 
>she fucking laughs 
>she immediately dismisses it 
>says Im too young 
>try a different method 
>find out my older sister was going to Miami in July with friends 
>Shes going over the fourth of July 
>Im going to Philmont over the fourth of July 
>The plan has failed 
>months go by again 
>its the end of Junior year 
>pika and I are getting closer and closer 
>We talk about cuddling all the time 
>The I love you joke becomes less of a joke, and has more actual meaning 
>be watching hearthstone videos one day 
>Thesixgamers lore channel 
>He makes an update about coming home from proposing to his fiance in America 
>decide to comment ask him about long distance 
>If all the days and nights spent apart are worth the few spent together, youve got a pretty good shot. 
>Think about this advice 
>I havent seen this girl in over a year, yet I think about her all the time 
>we talk all the time 
>hell, we even have nicknames for each other! 
>Im her pure angel, because as  you can tell from this whole story, Im a bit of a nerd and not really all that sexual, and watching over her 
>Shes my adorable attack kitty, always swearing to defend me 
>Plus she loves cats (who doesnt?) 
>I make a decision 
>Im going to ask her out 

>of course I cant see her in real life 
>decide to be risky 
>Im going to ask her out over skype! 
>I text her asking to skype like usual 
>She says yes 
>Call pika 
>she picks up 
>we have a usual conversation 
>about an hour in, I say I need to ask her something 
>Do you want to go on a date with me? 
>Oh, anon... 
>I really like you, but... 
>I dont want to do long distance. 
>Now what? 
>Well, can we at least try- 
>Oh, I never said I wouldnt try, I just dont think its going to work 
>ok, so at the very least she wants to try 
>thats good 
>So, you want to watch a movie or something sometime? 
>We talk more about dating and stuff 
>talk about us 
>I tell her how much she means to me 
>How much being around her makes me happy 
>In the cutest voice imaginable she says Anon, youre adorable! 
>we continue to flirt way into the night 
>end the call like we end all of our calls  
>I love you! 
>I love you too! 
>Im in 
>I have a chance with pika, the girl of my dreams 
>I wanted to sing! 
>I wanted to dance! 
>I wanted to tell everyone 
>a couple days go by 
>Date night comes 
>we skype and get on Netflix 
>originally, we were going to watch Look whos back but she was pretty exhausted after running tech for a show  
>decide to watch Znation instead 
>As to be expected, its shit 
>we shit on it the entire time 
>right down to the cgi babies 
>watch some more episodes 
>we should do this more often anon 
>we plan to do it again in a couple of days 
>all I think about is our date at school 
>makes me so giddy! 
>Hell, it makes me giddy just thinking back on it 
>We have our second date 
>Decide to watch some animus 
>She introduces me to the world of Fullmetal Alchemist:Brotherhood 
>We watch some of that 
>Also watch Soul Eater 
>Again, have a great time 
>do our usual hang up thing 
>fast forward a week 
>skyping her again 
>get to thinking 
>what are we? 
>are we dating? 
>weve been on two dates, but I dont feel like were dating 
>So, are we officially dating now? 
>Anon, I really like you, but I kinda just want to be friends 
>the dreaded friend zone 
>I really dont care though 
>my thought process is whatever makes her happy makes me happy 
>decide not to rush things 
>summer rolls around 
>pika and I still talk all the time 
>still flirt 
>one day we start talking about her sister 
>shes still very sensitive about it 
>get into a deep conversation whether it is easier to lose someone quickly and unexpectedly or in a long drawn out illness 
>She obviously chooses the latter side, I chose the former 
>discuss mortality for a while 
>eventually we get sleepy and we part ways 
>If only I had know how ironic that conversation was 

>go to Philmont 
>dont get to talk to her for a week 
>the only thing that gets me through is the thought of her 
>At the airport on the way back immediately text her  
>chat it up for a bit 
>shes doing fine 
>she wanted to go to a cosplay convention with machamp and her friends but her parents took her and her little brother to Disney instead 
>Im sad for her, but at the same time relieved 
>I would have been SUPER jealous of machamp if he went 
>I decide to check my AP exam grades  
>I passed them all 
>Somehow I got a 3 on my chem and a 4 on my U.S. history 
>Best of all, I got a 5 on my lang exam 
>I didnt even finish that course lol! 
>This is a great day 
>board my flight 
>watch mythbusters on the way back 
>living the dream 
>what could possibly go wrong? 
>the plane lands 
>get my shit 
>we start driving home 
>Jamming out to some sabaton (they are my shit) 
>getting pumped for their new album 
>overheard my parents talking about something 
>hushed tones 

>and they tried to get a priest in to do last rites... 
>what happened? 
>listen some more 
>he was riding his bike apparently 
>whats going on 
>too afraid to ask 
>hear something about Ghastlys family 
>Ghastly, thats what Im calling him, was an old friend of mine 
>we practically grew up together 
>families were very close 
>hell, I still remember the time he stayed over at my house before scout camp once 
>he threw up all over my door 
>we tried to clean it up, but it was no use 
>the stain is still there to this day 
>Think to myself I hope his sister is alright 
>I thought his sister got hurt or something 
>what if she did? 
>shit, what if HE died? 
>If he died, I dont know what I would do 
>It would be like if my brother died 
>we had drifted apart, but still he was a huge part of my childhood 
>we get back to our scout meeting hall to drop off some other members of my troop 
>ask my mom what happened 
>Ghastly was riding his bike back from his job at Publix, he didnt see a car coming and got hit. 
>Im sure hes ok 
>he has to be ok! 
>my mom turns to one of the kids moms 
>We cant do the party tomorrow, we just had a close friend of ours die 
>Wheres pika 
>I need her now 
>Its fucking one A.M and I need to talk to her 
>text pika 
>something terrible has happened, I need to talk to you 
>luckily she was up 
>She was in a group with friends on skype 
>the second I got home, she was calling me 
>Anon, are you alright? 
>we talked 
>She tried to comfort me 
>she knew what it was like 
>we talked about her sister as well 
>talking about ghastly makes me tear up 
>she hears this through skype 
>Anon, please dont cry, because if you cry, Ill cry 
>I can hear her muffled sobbing 
>we both sit there 
>at 2 am in the morning 
>just crying  
>and crying 
>and crying 
>I had no idea what to do 
>I asked her 
>Is everything going to be ok? 
>I felt so childish 
>I just needed comfort 
>my perfect day was suddenly destroyed 
>she replied of course it is, it always is 
>eventually we cleaned ourselves up and went to sleep 
>never before have I been so venerable 
>At the funeral, all I could think of was one quote 
>you see, when we were kids, ghastly and I were huge star wars nerds 
>we would have lightsaber fights and talk about our favorite Jedi 
>I kept thinking back to that scene from A New Hope 
>Where Obi-wan talks about Lukes father and his fate 
>Ani was a good friend 
>Indeed, Gastly was a good friend 
>The funeral procession went to the cemetery 
>Gastly as a kid had this lego rock monster 
>When I came over one day I really wanted it 
>I kept asking for it 
>He kept refusing 
>Just  before I left, he handed to me 
>Youll enjoy it more than I will 
>I never paid him back 
>I wanted to put it in his casket 
>but I was too weak 
>I still loved that guy 
>This whole thing made me feel like some part of me died 

>I remember the last time I saw him 
>It was at a memorial day party 
>he was sociable as usual 
>we said hi, caught up on life a little 
>later on in the party he was playing cards with some friends 
>they were playing B.S. 
>He invited me to join 
>I said no thanks 
>that was the last thing I ever said to him 
>I feel terrible, to this day about it 
>I should have played 
>I should have enjoyed my time with that great man while I could 
>He was amazing, and Im not just saying that because of hindsight 
>he greeted everyone with a smile 
>He was generous and kind 
>I miss him 

>life goes on 
>summer ends 
>half the teachers I like at school have quit 
>band starts back up (Im in color guard btw) 
>Still talking to Pika 
>Couple of my friends at school knew Ghastly 
>One of them was there when it happened 
>The guy that killed him was going 60 
>didnt even slow down 
>Huge fucking dent in his car 
>blood everywhere 
>all over the road 
>worst part was he didnt die instantly 
>he suffered 
>He laid there on the road 
>he eventually got taken to the hospital 
>Things were looking good 
>He was getting stabilized  
>then he was gone 
>Pika still tried to cheer me up 
>She did a damn good job at it 
>she was the only thing keeping me happy 
>We looked forward to states 
>I talked to her about having my first kiss with her 
>going out to dinner with her 
>it was so idyllic in a world filled with shit 
>too idyllic 
>things continue 
>Pika and I flirt, as usual 
>Start to think about what we were again 
>too close to be friends 
>yet definitely not dating 
>go to the doctors office for a checkup 
>they have a depression survey 
>most of the time I would lie and say I was fine 
>this time was different 
>I was honest 
>doc is concerned 
>puts me on anti-anxiety pills 
>Talk to pika about it 
>Thank her, as without her I wouldnt have the courage to be honest with herself 
>shes flattered 
>decide to skype again 
>conversation moves to us 
>I talk a little about gastley 

>Start questioning her on life 
>She gets to the topic of her sister 
>She starts bawling 
>She watched her sister die r9k 
>she watched her die 
>she says she wants to make people happy because she doesnt want anyone to know what it was like to be as sad as her 
>Apparently, the day she died, her parents were out of town 
>pika was at home 
>after a two year battle, she was gone 
>she died alone 
>at the hospital 
>no one but the nurses to see her go 
>She usually wasnt this sentimental about her sister 
>I asked her about it, as earlier she claimed she was numb to it all and it didnt affect her anymore 
>She lied 
>She was my sister anon... my sister 
>I wanted to hug her 
>I wanted to squeeze her so tight 
>this amazing girl was crying right in front of me 
>yet I could do nothing 
>I wanted to die 
>she said she didnt want a relationship because she doesnt want to become too attached to people 
>because shes afraid to lose someone else 
>I recalled talking about my suicidal tendencies earlier 
>I was an idiot for saying those things 
>she was scared of losing me too 
>Hell, I was scared of losing her 
>we talked some more 
>I talked about my issues 
>You see r9k I had been bullied relentlessly for 9 years as a kid in a private catholic school 
>People would harass me, call me faggot, manipulate me into asking people out just to watch me fail 
>just to watch me fail 
>they would always talk about how I had aids from getting fucked in the ass so much 
>at first I tried to go to the teachers 
>they didnt give a fuck 
>no one gave a fuck about me 
>not even myself 
>it intensified over the years 

>At one point people locked me in a trailer and beat me with a wiffle ball bat 
>at lunch I would sit in silence 
>eventually I moved to the cool kids table 
>but all they would do was mock me to my

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Falling in love with a pokemon


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