The Dead Bus - A Pictorial
Have you ever been on a bus that broke down on the freeway? I’ve seen tons of them on the shoulder, emptied and waiting for the mobile mechanic. The Buses look sad - desolate and hopeless. You see them much more frequently these days. I think Metro has stopped all preventive maintenance - at least on the buses going to Kent.
I’ve been on buses that pulled over on the freeway and picked up stranded passengers. Those poor people, late to their jobs and doctors’ appointments and such. Maybe court appearances and Methadone doses. I’d never been on a bus that broke down until this afternoon.
We were on a short, new bus – the ones that constantly break down. We had just gotten onto I-5 and into the Carpool Lane. Then we slowed down. Waaay down. We were stopping. This isn’t unusual as there is sometimes heavy traffic in this area, but I looked out the window and saw none of the other lanes were slowing down. Then I saw the familiar numbers code appear on the little reader board that shows the next stop. That’s when I knew the engine had died.
So we came to a full stop. There is no space to pull over further from the carpool lane and we couldn’t make it across another four lanes of road to pull over on the right. Actually, there isn’t room there, either. There we were, a massive traffic obstacle. Cars, trucks, and motorcycles flew past us. Other buses flew past us. Some people honked, others navigated the zigzag of motorists avoiding us.
"Haay SoundTransit! Your buses hardly ever break down! Why not give us a ride?"
The driver tried turning the engine over, but it was dead. We were a big green and yellow turd in the punchbowl that was I-5 south.
Not a single person complained about the delay. We all sat in silence. Had this been the 150, it would have
been a free-for-all. Word.
The driver apologized, which we all thought was sad. They always give this guy the bus that breaks down. He’s a nice guy. That’s probably why he gets the shaft. “They’re sending a bus to come get us," he reported.
We waited about 15 minutes, and then a good, old, long Metro bus came for us. It pulled ahead of us by about 500 feet, also in the carpool lane. We were blocking traffic something fierce. The Washington DOT traffic guys came to divert traffic so we could all get off the dead bus and board the Live Bus.
Here’s what it looked like:
We got off the dead bus.
While the WaDOT guys blocked traffic in the fast lane, we walked to the live bus. The See's Candy Lady and the Bank Security Guard are in this pic.
The dead bus, a.k.a. El Autobus Muerto
And here we are boarding the live bus.
Ahh! An old, Dirty Metro bus with an articulation. Our new best friend.
And away we went! I was only about 30 minutes late getting home. Not bad for a freeway mechanical failure.
By the way, the Bookkeeper got a henna tattoo. I promised her she'd be on the blog for it, so here you go. Tail of the Dragon, Eye of the Tiger, Girl!
Dirty Kindle Lady
(This part is not a pictorial.)
So, when we boarded the live bus our seating arrangements changed. On the first bus, I was in my favorite seat – the far back corner. When we got on the second bus, I was last getting on (because of my mad photography skills and because a somewhat confused, dirty little man blocked me from getting out of my seat). I ended up sitting directly behind the last forward facing seat by the back door. I was in the sideways seats.
Consider the plexiglass divider between the seat in front of me and the back door. What is this for, anyway? Is it to block the elements when the door opens? Perhaps drafts from ill-fitting weatherstripping? A spit guard? I’ll tell you what it is: It’s a tool for those sitting in that seat to spy on the people behind them. I use it to check my hair in the mornings sometimes. The lady sitting in it today used it to become a totally paranoid wreck.
I boarded the bus, all excited about the goings on. I looked forward – even took a few pics. As my eyes moved from the coach to the window, something caught my peripheral vision.
“…she was exploding around him.” Or something similar. Someone was exploding around someone else.
Whoa! The woman in front of me had her Kindle font size at like 40. And she was reading the naughty bit of a story. I cocked my head (haha – go ahead with that pun) to see the other 10 words on the screen. In this seconds-long pause, she spotted me in the plexiglass.
BUSTED!
Now, those who read on the bus are probably thinking I’m a total jackass for reading over this woman’s shoulder. I couldn’t help it. There’s a dirty encounter in larger-than-life Arial. I am going to peek. It’s as bad as telling me not to peek if the people were actually having their affair on the bus. Exploding around each other. I can’t help but take a quick look.
I can, however, resist repeating my glance. And I did for the most part. I didn’t have to worry much about it because she began shifting, moving her head to block my view of her Kindle. She was all over the place, moving from right to left as she swiped those electronic pages, silently hoping I couldn’t see. She checked the plexiglass no less than 15 times from the Tukwila exit to Kent Station. She turned around and looked at me as though she was pretending to look out the window – which I also saw in my peripheral vision.
I think it’s safe to assume she was dying of embarrassment – but it didn’t stop her from reading it. She may have been squirming for other reasons. Let’s hope that wasn’t the case. I’m going with embarrassment. The story didn’t seem to be thathot.
I was laughing by now, messaging someone about the whole situation. I did glance over one more time and I think I saw the F-word, but I can’t be sure. When we reached the first stop, she moved to an empty seat and shot me dirty looks. Looks that were even dirtier than the lame romance novel she was reading. I guarantee you the word "manhood" was in that story somewhere.
I thought she might slap me, but she didn’t. While I deny being a jackass for reading over her shoulder, I can't deny ruining her reading time for the afternoon. But she really needs to turn the font size down when the good parts come up. (<-- Triple entendre. bam bam BAM!)
