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DKNY and my new profession PART 1

Look who is back! I actually had a couple of good friends read my Blog and compliment me on it ... and I didn't even have to pay them! So I decided to check out the old neglected Blog and after re-reading some posts I decided to write an update! Do you realize that when they read it they TRIPLED my readers? Sa-WEEEET!!!

So last week I got an invite to the WAAF Mantown Girl Calandar Release Party (at least I THINK that was the name of it). We had some VIP passes and my buddy said that we needed to dress up. Normally that would bum me out because, as I've said before, I am a Jeans & T-Shirt kind of guy. However, I DID buy a couple of suits when my dad passed away so I was all set for this "Dress Up" party. Actually I really want to get my money's worth out of these suits and going to a dress up party sounded like way more fun than attending funerals of people I didn't know ... which yeah, was my original plan to get my money's worth!

OK, so I have my suit and I am ready to go BUT then my buddy calls and says "Dump the suit, dress cass" (which I find out is "Metrosexual Speak" for CASUAL) ... OH SHIT! My "cass" is a pair of Wranglers and a Hooters T-Shirt ... certainly not the "Cass" he had in mind!

SIDE TRIP HERE WE COME: This has nothing to do with the original story BUT I had to share it with you... A Buddy at work pointed this out to me! Go to Google Images and type in Douchebag ... go ahead, I'll wait here! Good, you're back. Now did you see the picture of the douchebag with the Blow Out, headband and puffy lips sporting the ORANGE tan? How would you like to be HIM! If someone in Cambodia Googled "Douchebag" YOU ARE THE GUY THEY SEE! You ARE the world's DOUCHEBAG! I bet that makes his mom proud!

So I Googled Douchebag, saw what they were wearing, printed out one of the pictures and headed to Filene's! Ran into the Men's Department picked out the clothes in the picture and BAM, I was dressing CASS!

A few hours later there we are walking into the Landsdowne Pub and I'm sporting some Flypaper Jeans and a DKNY Shirt ... yeah I'm just a blowout and frosted tips away from being a full blown douchebag!

Now my buddy had told me that we would be meeting some women. I naively thought he meant there would be a shit load of woman at this party. Anyone want to guess how many woman were there? Anyone??? I'll give you a hint ... it's a frickin CALENDAR RELEASE PARTY! Yeah, 12 of them!!! It was a complete SAUSAGE FEST ... and here I am in my best DKNY shirt!

I will say it was a great party and we did drink a lot ... which always helps any bad situation! After the party we went to a couple of other places that DID have lots of women. One thing I did find out about my buddy is that he is the BEST wing man I have ever had. This guy could start up a conversation with ANYONE! It was great!

So I meet Jesalynn, a very attractive brunette with beautiful eyes and the greatest smile ... AND she just happened to be wearing nothing but a bra and panties! Now before you go jumping to conclusions I just want to assure you that we were NOT at a strip club. We were at a lagitimate bar in Boston. Apparently she was "promoting her new lingerie company" ... and she was doing it VERY WELL!

It seems she is starting a new company, her and her two friends, and this is how they promote their product. Yes this IS where I would like to begin the "Dear Penthouse I can't believe this happened to me" story ... but I'm going to stick with what REALLY HAPPENED.

But that's going to have to wait until PART 2!

What, you weren't expecting a cliff hanger?

This post first appeared on Random Thoughts, please read the originial post: here

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DKNY and my new profession PART 1


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