One thing is for sure, I am afraid of dying.

Even as I was driving to the emergency room this spring, my Deepest Fear that I was more terrified of death than I was seeking professional help. And believe me, I was scared shitless about going to the hospital.

After all, I was the guy who always won. The guy who, at the last minute, figured a way out of the situation and got back on the path towards victory.

Feeling I only had three choices made it clear what I needed to do.

READ: Up Against the Wall

But what am I afraid of in my life?

“Our Deepest Fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our darkness that most frightens us.” – Marianne Williamson

If I choose to live, to be here and participate, then I need to understand more about how I can live a balanced life. Getting there requires some introspection. This activity can be very powerful if I am able to be honest with myself.

Studying Napoleon Hill and reading his book Think and Grow Rich, I remember him saying that as he worked with people, the first step was to make them success conscious.

Recounting my life, I can see so many chances where I could be “powerful beyond measure,” and instead I retreated back to the safety of being “just OK.”

Now I have had a taste or two of being in the Light, and it is amazing. But to allow myself to step out of the darkness and use the gifts I have been given, is frightening.

Yet here I am struggling with how to overcome my feelings of inadequacy.

Those moments where I pushed past the Fear of success and went ahead anyway, are some of my defining moments. Thinking about them gives me the encouragement to do more. Being powerful beyond measure consistently is my goal. Doing that is another thing.

What are you afraid of?

The post I’m Afraid I don’t know what I’m afraid of appeared first on My Concealed Depression.