What if you stopped caring about what others thought about you? Caring what other people think is the number one way to continuously sabotage yourself from the inside out. It’s human nature to care, to some extent, how other people see us. But when it gets to the point where we can’t make decisions without someone else’s approval, that’s where things get dangerous. I’m not here to preach to you and make you feel worse about yourself. There is no point in that. I will, however, give you five clear reasons to stop caring what others think so you can boost your happiness and live a better life.
When you do not seek or need approval, you are at your most powerful.” ~Anonymous~
5 CLEAR REASONS TO STOP CARING WHAT OTHERS THINK
ARE OTHER PEOPLE’S OPINIONS CONTROLLING YOU?
Are you allowing other people’s opinions of you control you?
How much of your self-esteem is truly tied to other people’s opinions of you?
This was such a difficult question for me to sit down and honestly respond to. But when I truly opened up and looked myself in the mirror, I realized something profound.
I had let go of the wheel of my life and allowed what other people thought of me to dictate what I did, how I spoke and how I acted. It was as if I had become a slave to what others wanted, and no longer live life a the strong, independent woman I claimed to be.
My insecurities had doubled and I was now a chronic people-pleaser. It was sheer madness.
Can you relate?
Have you allowed your desire to be liked by everyone mould you into someone you barely recognize? Do you hide your genuine personality so you can be the perfect person for all people?
Can you remember what it’s like to feel like yourself?
Are you letting other people’s opinions control your entire life?
IF YOU ARE, HERE ARE FIVE POWERFUL REASONS TO STOP CARING WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK ABOUT YOU:
1 LIFE IS TOO SHORT
This might sound cliché in a way, but I like a little bit of cliché. As human beings, we have one life to live on this earth. When we care too much about what other people think and allow those thoughts to direct our lives, we run the risk of messing up the one chance we have.
You were given a time to be born and a time to die, but it’s also your responsibility to do amazing things in between.
Don’t spend your life constantly wondering what others think and in that way waste your existence. You were made for so much more than that!
Want to open your very own beauty salon but are terrified that no-one will come to you? Do it anyway! Believe you have the talent and skills to make it happen.
And so what if everyone doesn’t like your salon? That’s fine! You can’t be everything to everyone, and that’s perfectly okay. Life is short so do your best to live it.
I know this sounds a bit morbid but imagine that you’re on your deathbed looking back over your life. How would you have wanted to see it go down?
Regretting the opportunities you never took? Apologising for not doing things? Or celebrating all the awesome adventures you had?
2 YOU CAN’T READ MINDS
There have been so many times when I’ve had near nervous breakdowns because I swore to the heavens that I knew what everyone else was Thinking about me. But the truth is that I didn’t.
We can’t read other people’s minds so how do we truly know what they are thinking about us?
Although lots of people openly say things to us, there is no way to know if what they say to us is actually what they truly believe. I’m not gonna lie and say that I’ve never told people things just to hurt their feelings because I have.
Plus, not everyone who tells you something is on your side. Many people will say things just to hurt your feelings so you don’t outshine them and that’s just the truth about life.
That’s why it’s really important to ignore a lot of the noise you hear from other people. Because they’re just that…noise.
Take it from someone who spent her entire teens listening to other people’s opinions, stop! I couldn’t read people’s minds then and you can’t read people’s minds now.
Please don’t waste time believing that people are thinking the worst about you. Instead, try believing that they admire every step you take in life.
Go out there, be yourself, smile and shine because we’re rooting for you!
3 EVERYONE HAS INSECURITIES
I don’t spend as much time on social media as I probably should for my business. The main reason is that social media overtook my life a few years back.
For every picture I uploaded, I would stress over what others would think. It got to the point where I would filter out every flaw or imperfection I saw on my face before uploading them.
I’ve come to realize that everyone has insecurities and nobody is perfect.
Even the celebrities that we see online posting pictures every day have insecurities. They worry about the size of their butt, the curves they have (or paid for) and the angles of the photos they take.
What I’m trying to say is that everyone has flaws and feels insecure regardless of who they are or what they look like.
So, if you think about it, we’re all flawed human beings caring what other equally flawed humans think of us.
Don’t do that to yourself. Do not build a prison you can’t escape from.
4 IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO PLEASE EVERYONE
This is such an important lesson I have struggled to learn for years. I’ve probably said this a few times but when I first started my blog, I was determined to be everything to everyone.
I would offer news, DIY, entertainment and use every talent God gave me.
Little did I know that trying to do all that would slowly begin to tear me down. The more I tried to appeal to everyone, the sooner I realized I was engaging no-one.
This was an embarrassing and important turning point for me in my life and in my business.
When I was about 12 years old, I started attending secondary school. At that time I was extremely self-conscious and everyone’s opinions mattered.
My classmates mostly came from prominent primary schools and their parents were fairly well off. They had nice houses, cars, and wore designer shoes with their uniforms.
Never had I felt the burden to fit in more than at that moment. The more I listened to everyone’s opinions of me and what my life should look like, the more I lied to try to fit into their narrative.
I told them about the rich businessman my mom worked for and the many restaurants my dad owned, all because I was ashamed of what others would think of me.
It wasn’t until I met my soon-to-be forever friends in the SS1 (senior secondary) that I slowly embraced who I was.
Caring what others thought almost ruined my entire high school experience and it is ruining your daily experience.
You can’t please everyone because you don’t exist to please everyone.
5 MOST PEOPLE DON’T CARE AS MUCH AS YOU THINK THEY DO
As selfish as this might sound- most people spend the majority of their time thinking about themselves. They really don’t care as much about you as you think they do.
Though we might be feeling that all eyes are on us all the time, that’s just simply not true.
We spend most of our times living in our heads, thinking about our next meal, business venture or that vacation we want to take next year. That goes for the other people around you as well.
Think about it. How many hours do you spend thinking (and I mean seriously thinking) about other people’s imperfections? Not many I can bet.
I’m almost certain you don’t spend your day trying to find every blemish that exists on your co-workers’ faces or guessing how many pounds everyone has gained since the Christmas party.
If you do, chances are you really need another hobby.
In all seriousness though, other people don’t care about you as much as you think because, often times, they’re too busy wondering what others think of them!
How refreshing is that?!
WHAT OTHERS THINK OF YOU IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS… FOR REAL!
Realizing that what others think about you is none of your business, is such a freeing experience. Everyone will always have an opinion of you, but at the end of the day, it’s just an opinion.
No matter how loud people speak and no matter how often they tell you, what others say about you is really a reflection of them.
If I spent my life saying bad things about other people, what kind of person would you say I am? Probably evil and jealous, right?
It’s time to stop giving other people, who really have no say in your life, the power to control it. Think about this:
- Will someone else’s opinions of your intelligence change how smart you are without your permission? No!
- Is spending your time listening to what everyone thinks about you making you any happier? I don’t think so!
- Are you willing to sacrifice everything you are and everything you were meant to be because of what someone else thinks? This should be a big no!
LET OTHER PEOPLE JUDGE YOU. IT’S FINE IF THEY MISUNDERSTAND BECAUSE WHAT THEY THINK OF YOU IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. OTHER PEOPLE’S OPINIONS DON’T PAY THE BILLS OR PUT FOOD ON THE TABLE.
SO BE COMMITTED TO STAYING KIND TO YOURSELF, LOVING EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR GROWTH AND BEING AS AUTHENTIC AS YOU SHOULD BE NO MATTER WHAT PEOPLE SAY OR THINK.
KEEP ON SHINING, BE YOURSELF AND LET THE HATERS HATE. ONCE YOU IGNORE THEM, THEIR WORDS CAN ONLY AFFECT ONE PERSON… THEMSELVES!
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