If you are having trouble forming new lasting friendships, improving your listening skills may be a new tactic to try.
By Allison Strong
Hello, I’m Allison Strong with bp Magazine’s bphope Vlog.
This is, “Why Is It So Hard to Make Friends?” I’ve often wondered if I’m going to be a loner for life or it I can finally have a circle of friends.
Making friends has always been hard for me. One of the reasons I think it’s hard for us is that as people with bipolar…we tend to feel our feelings very intensely, sometimes they hit us right out of the blue.
In our desire to be truthful and authentic, we overdo it—we figure, They don’t have bipolar disorder so they won’t really understand. We overdo the explaining and run right over healthy boundaries.
Other people, who have feelings of their own, feel unseen and unheard and they drift away.
Those invitations, such as “Let’s do lunch?”—they never happen.
Here’s what I’ve been trying on for size: talking less than the other person. wait for at least two seconds before responding to what they have to say.
Trust me, it’s a stretch…but if I equalize the back and forth, people tend to stick around.
Friends who have known me for years say, “Allison, what happened with you? You’ve changed!”
So let me ask: Do you have a tough time keeping your conversations brief?
Or…if you are balancing things, how are you doing it?
In the replies section below, please share your thoughts so we can troubleshoot this together.
I’m Allison Strong for bp Magazine’s bphope Vlog..and if you haven’t asked another person, “How are you today?” Do it! Have a great day. Ciao!