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Wednesday August 31st, 2016

Fuck it. I need to write. Last night was Honestly the worst night I have had in a very long time. I had to tell the person I Love with all my heart that I am not in love with him anymore. It's all due to our lack of communication and mean, horrible remarks that have been said. My eyes hurt, my face hurts, my heart hurts. I am a mess. I know this is what's best for me but it still kills me. I barely slept, kept tossing and turning thinking about how much this sucks and how I never wanted it to get like this. It wasn't supposed to end like this. We were supposed to get married, have kids and live happily ever after. Now I will be going back to my parents house for the time being, alone, sad and honestly scared because he is all I have knows for a long time. Also I hate being alone, like hate it. I love being in a relationship where I can share everything with that person. I love having that companionship. I am thinking I should take some time off that for me though. Maybe, it will be hard but I need to think. I really am so excited to eventually get out to Colorado, maybe that will clear my head. 

But my birthday will never be the same again, this memory will forever haunt my mind. The day that I lost my best friend - I have to just keep telling myself that I am doing the right thing for me and that I do not deserve to get hurt again. I feel the tears starting to pool in my eyes so I have to go. Can't cry at work......again. 



  stay humble, stay peaceful, and always stay hopeful 


This post first appeared on Always Hopeful, please read the originial post: here

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Wednesday August 31st, 2016

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