Moving on and letting go. Life is a series of beginnings and endings and one must not get caught in an ending, Too many times I have revisited the past and now realize it was not the right thing to do. I have an excellent autobiographical memory which has its benefits and drawbacks. Too often bad experiences stayed in my mind. I very often tried to second guess myself and think how I would approach a situation differently many years later.
Let me digress a little bit and discuss the two Dylan films. I'm Not There was a surrealistic biopic of Dylan released in 2007 which I described in this journal in November of that year, I interpret the title as saying that Bob Dylan is not there since 5 actors and 1 actress portray him in the film. There is a song by Dylan called I'm Not There that was originally recorded for the Basement Tapes. The version in the movie was recorded by Sonic Youth. If you read the lyrics, it appears a very non-romantic song where the protagonist is not there for his former lover.
Don't Look Back released in 1967 was documentary of Dylan's 1965 concert tour of England when he still played acoustic folk music. I interpreted the title as Dylan's moving forward to folk rock and not wanting to look back at the past. There is also a song from the 1965 album Bringing it All Back home called She Belongs to Me where Dylan shows admiration for a woman by saying "She's got everything she needs, she's an artist, she don't look back. Hey, this guy won the Nobel Prize for literature. Can't he use correct grammar?
I was there for 25 years, but I'm Not There today because I don't want to look back on much frustration and unhappiness that happened while I was there. The early days were happier for me, but they are long gone and couldn't be relived if I returned.
I never know who reads this journal, but I assume from time to time a few people over there view it. If so, please understand that I don't feel bitterness toward anyone. I am doing well by pursuing interests that I enjoy. I just don't want to look back.