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What will the coming year look like?

Last April, as I left the hospital diagnosed with major depressive disorder, that was all I could think about.

Now, a year later, I have the added worry of Covid-19. This begs the question, what will the coming year look like? Tackling my Depression, I found proven techniques, tips, support groups, therapist and a Psychiatrist to help in my recovery. Combined, they all have helped me construct a life that leads toward living a balanced life with depression.

If that were not challenging enough, now I must understand what COVID-19 means for the coming year.

Considering the professional community is still adjusting to the pandemic, it is no wonder I am a little fuzzy on what the coming year will look like. First it was don’t wear the mask. Now, everyone should be wearing a mask. In fact, in the DC Metro area, many jurisdictions are mandating them.  There is talk about how to “open America” again balanced against the inevitable rise in cases of COVID-19.

What will the coming year look like?

Each one of us will need to ask that question. Part of the answer lies in how we frame our answer.  I do not have control over my DNA which includes depression. I do not have control over a pandemic. But I do have control over my attitude towards both.

This one thing allows me to decide what is important in my life.

And then, it gives me the power of how I react to what is happening. I am not going to say that having that power makes deciding how I will move forward easier. But it is the one thing I can do. It is very easy to wish that things had been different. That I did not have depression all my life. That I lived in a world where there we no pandemics, no threats to our existence. But that’s a waste of time and energy.

I have the same 24 hours in a day everyone else has.

How I choose to use them is what makes them mine. I can wallow around in my own crapulence, or I can get moving and accomplish something. Lately, I have been writing about not being able to move forward. And each time I write, I am marching in place. It may look good on paper, but it does not feel like I am making any progress.

I have decided that I will not be intimidated by COVID-19.

This was the same decision I made last April about my depression. After 43 years of hiding it, ignoring it, and generally just hoping it would go away, I spun around 180 degrees and faced it. I asked for professional help and I went after the very thing I had hidden from, learning everything I could about it’s sneaky and secretive ways.

I no longer fear depression or my diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD).

But that doesn’t mean I take depression for granted. I am vigilant and ever watchful for any signs of its attempts to assert itself into my daily life. I am getting very good at catching myself in unhelpful thinking styles. While I don’t always do it at the moment, I have been successful at recognizing them in minutes hours, and occasionally a day or two. This is 100% better than not seeing these for what they are and not addressing them.

One positive note, many of the tools I have learned to combat depression are effective against COVID-19.

READ MORE: Which new normal? COVID-19 or MDD

In that sense, both depression and COVID-19 can be addressed, for me, using a similar mindset. Getting to decide how much energy I expend worrying about both is my choice. I am not advocating sticking my head in the sand, But I do not have to run around like chicken little, screaming the sky is falling.

Now I am not saying that making these decisions about my attitude is easy or straight-forward.

But they are possible, and I am doing it. However, as I wrote yesterday, I am feeling a little stuck and have not set a course yet for what comes next. This is where I am right now. Making my choices about how I will view what is happening.

I do not feel scared, but I do not have a clear picture yet of what the coming year will look like.

I have a therapist appointment tomorrow via video chat. I am planning to use that session to work trough this question. I will write more once I know more.

My concealed depression is written under the alias “Depression is not my boss.” I have certifications in SMART Recovery and am a Global Career Development Facilitator.

Last year, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder.

If you know someone who might benefit from reading this, please share.  And your comments are always appreciated.

The post What will the coming year look like? appeared first on My Concealed Depression.



This post first appeared on Depression Is Not My Boss, please read the originial post: here

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