Transitions are not always easy.
Having held a corporate position for a number of years, I became rather used to the way things worked there. You’re given an assignment and a period of time and you’re expected to complete the work within that time. If you do well, you’re rewarded accordingly and you move on to the next assignment, building on learnings from the previous work. Over 37 years, I was rewarded with various things like promotions, raises, sports tickets, clothing and trinkets with the company logo, time off, dinner with top corporate bosses, trips, funding of a college degree, verbal accolades, money, and more.
Now that I’m Retired, things are a bit different. I find that my very Type A/ISTJ personality still drives me to organize my life through the use of lists, and in that way, I still have the reward of satisfaction as each item is crossed off the list, complete. However. Nobody is handing me cash and prizes for excellent performance! I miss that.
My husband and I are identical in some ways but so very different in others. We both value our family first, we both Love the outdoors, prefer the country very much over the city, we love children, we love God, we have a good work ethic, we love working a good hands-on project together, we love to boat, hike, travel. On the opposite side, I struggle. He can’t imagine ever making a list for any purpose. He prefers seeing a movie over reading the book(!). He never needs time to just be alone. He wants to do everything together. He has sports on the TV non-stop with the volume so high I seriously cannot even hear my own thoughts. Oh my word, I’m dying here! Where did this man come from? Mars, for cryin’ out loud?!
In retrospect, in our lives until now, there were always circumstances that forced us to spend time apart. My job took me on the road traveling frequently. He often had side coaching jobs in addition to his day job. It becomes apparent that we haven’t fully known each other up to this point.
Retirement happened in stages for me, bringing me to where I am today. First, I stopped working in the office fulltime and worked from home for three days a week. Then I worked from home fulltime for six months before I officially retired. My husband continued to work for the first six months after I retired, so I was still getting significant time without him.
We had decided that when we both retired, we wanted to sell our home, pay off the bills, and travel for a few years. So. That meant first moving from a 2200 square foot house to a 33-foot travel trailer with a storage locker in the background. We still had two TV’s and all was good. Second, we left our trailer behind for traveling the country in a 16-foot small camper….pulling it behind our Dodge 1500 Ram Club Cab pick-em-up truck. For the love of God. What were we thinking? This man is in my face 24/7 and I have lost my mind.
To some extent, I’m kidding but the rant helped. He and I have had multiple discussions recently about how needing time alone does not mean that I no longer love him. He seems to be having trouble with the concept. I imagine we will grow into a routine shortly that works for both of us. Hopefully soon. Before one or the other of us suffers serious injury. I am really kidding. Our retirement experience so far has been filled with adventure far outweighing the negatives. But keep us in your prayers, people, please! And thank you.
In the meantime, could I please just run to the store BY MYSELF?! Without hurting anyone’s feelings?