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how to attract women: the ultimate guide


In this post, I’ll share with you woman’s darkest secrets, they don’t want you to know, and how you can use this knowledge to your advantage when in a negotiation that involves a Woman.

We will cover:

body language, eye-contact and the shit-tests.

10 things that Women find attractice in men

The eyes and Women

Why do I know this? Because I am a door-to-door salesman and when I was selling  energy contracts in Ghettos, I made more than 162 sales in one month,  where the typical sales-rep did 10 and I did these mostly to women. And I did it deliberately and consciently applying these same tactics I am about to whare with you.

This is what I do for a living, so I want to share this with you, from my perspective

All set? Let’s Go.


How women are superior body-language analysts

Women from the biological stance are physically weaker than men, and earlier on in the pre-historical times and througout ages, when they stayed with the kids and needed to take care of the family while man were gone out to hunt, they developed a different skillset to protect their kids: body language.

There have been medical studies conducted that conclusively prove that women can read people five times faster than man. And this is right out of the get-go, without any sort of formal training. In this study, doctors had a set of social situations happening in short movie clips without sound where people were interacting with one another. violent Situation, peaceful situations…all sort of different settings and they had their test-subjects with a pair of goggles so they could focus on the situation without any sort of distractions.

Conducting CT-scans, women when focused on trying to read the situations that were presented (“Is he going to hurt her?”, “Is she lying?”, “Is that person stressed out?”), showed five times more brain activity in their frontal-lobes than men.

So, when you are in a situation like a door-to-door sale, like I did in Ghettos, and you are in a setting that by its own very nature is already violence-proned, where people are expecting situations like this out of the blue, like gang-related situations or cops busting in looking for people, if you face a woman, especially in envoronments like these, where they are even more sharp at this, you can be damn sure she is going to put her body-language armor and start probing you like wonder-woman on the spot.

Scents that make a woman go crazy

The cosmetics industry makes billions in revenue. and spend shit-loads of money in research. They reached a conclusion that these are the top three scents that activate women’s sex drive when sensing that in men




These can come any shape of form you use them, as long as you use them: creams, body-lotion, hand-lotion, perfume. Just use these three.

This is what I do:

1. Body-lotion and hand-lotion: vanilla scent

2. lip-balm: pepperish scent

3. with my coffee, I use one of those cinnamon sticks. Yout get this nice coffee-cinnamon warm breath.

Colors that make a woman go insane

Just like the cosmetics industry, Marketing research as concluded beyond any reasonable doubt that the colors that instill more human response when combined are: red, white and black.

Red is the color for sex. Think about it: why do they use blush and use red lipstick? They are enhnacing their blood vessels to show more red.
It is also a sign of health: think about a pale dude and one with shiny tanned skin.

When having an orgasm, women are much more red as blood is flowing more. So this is a big one.

So if women are thinking aout sex, and they see  a man with red, they are subconsciously going to look.

Black and white – used in combination, as these are extreme opposites of the color spectrum, these colors ge the attention of your brain like a digital logic of 0 1 binary logic. Its a brain thing. If it was from brown to dark it would be an attentin grabber. Black, white are opposites so they do what is called a pattern interrupt.

Used in combinatin with red this becomes quite effective.

Notice how prices at local groceries, traffic signs, and some major brands use a combination of these three colors.

So, when dressing, I use a red shirt, black pants, black belt and black shoes. This has worked out well for me.

The Alpha

The whole thing with women is that they are looking out for the alpha. That’s their overall mission when interacting with men.They are looking for the one that can ensure the survival of their species, protect and provide them a good life. So, as soon as you start thinking about things this way, you will find that you will soon start asking yourself: “How would the alpha-male behave?”

When you come to this realization, and start acting more like the alpha, I promise you, that they will notice. How do you behave like the alpha? Here is a set of guiding principles:

1 – move at your own pace – think about it, the Lion doesn’t please anyone and moves when he wants and how he wants to. He is in charge and doesn’t give a fuck about what you think. And if you have a problem, try going to the lion and say that: You will die.

But leaders don’t need to tell people they are the leaders, they show it, but how they behave.

The lion doesn’t need to around all jumpy-like “I’m gonna kill you”, he is sure of himself, calm and strong. He knows he can kill you and is not a bit nervous about it.

Think about it: if you are 7 feet tall, you don’t need to show people that you are 7 feet tall, they can see it. Just like the dude with muscles: you don’t need to be in spandex without a shirt for people to understand you are a big dude.

If you carry yourself in a way this you show confidence and a certain peace regarding who you are. You are showing confidence and people will feel that.

2 – shoulders back, stand tall and chin up – these are self-explanatory but important to address anyway if you are not carrying yourself in this way. If you look down, shrink and shrug shoulders you show a sign of lack of trust and this is a no-no. If you are not used to acting and portray yourself more confidently, you need to do it more deliberately. In time it will start becoming a natural behavior.

3 – walking like you are swinging it – you have an enormous “representative” in your “section”. You don’t walk around running like a crazy-chicken. You swing it a bit side-to-side, leave room for your “section” as it is big. You are the Alpha remember? Open chest, walking side to side, look up and make eye movement at all times. This is a clear sign of someone that is in charge.

4 – deep voice tonality – ever felt the difference between a high-pitch wuss and a deep voice like James-Earl Jones? Who has more instant commanding power?

A deep voice is something we all have naturally, but because most people don’t train and understand how to relax their throat muscles and breath properly, they sound stressed and go throughout their lives with an unnatural high-pitch voice.

Obviously, since you are not like most people, you will learn how to use your voice properly. You will feel much better actually, as this is your natural voice anyway. You are just not used to using it. But as soon as you start used to talk with your natural tone, you won’t go back. You can learn more about this here

5 – taking up room – Alphas take up more room. They need it. If you are sitting, sit in the middle of the couch, or set of chairs. Both your harms rest on the adjacent chairs and have a wide leg stance. (skinny candles fall, wide stance shows more confidence)

If you have a table in front of you, have stuff on it. Take up room. Your mobile, your pen, your agenda. Don’t care or bother if people sit at the table as well. You are claiming more space because you are the boss. You will see that they will adjust. and take up less room, by unconsciously taking up less room than you to accommodate to you.

6 – no fidgeting – fidgeting is a sign of nervousness. Get used to have your hands where people can see them. Women are suckers for hands. They notice them. It is a common thing to hear women say things like: “He has beautiful hands”. Also, showing hands means you are not hiding something. If people see your hands it is a sign you are not hiding a weapon. It’s a subconscious thing.

10 things that women find attractive in men

There are ten things I noticed all women I interacted with showed positive signs.

1 – veins – women love veins. Those stick extruded veins on your hands, forearms, and biceps? Women love them. As mentioned before, any signs of healthy blood “vessels” indicate a healthy male and a chance of survival of the offspring.

2 – bald – women love a balded man. 0 hair. They love it.

3 – open chest – Have two or three buttons of your shirt unbuttoned. You are showing confidence by opening up and leaving unprotected one of the most sensitive areas in your body, your chin, and chest. This is a clear sign of confidence as you are subconsciously saying: you have not shot of hurting me, I am not the least bothered by you so I am going to leave this area of my body completely out in the open as I am that confident.

4 –  sarcasm – Sarcasm is a clear indicator of intelligence. High-level intelligence people are very sarcastic. They are saying things with double meanings, being indirect by addressing direct situations and using humor to address things people are thinking about but are not talking about.

Women see sarcasm as an attractive factor. A good example of this that I did on a consistent basis, was when doing a presentation at someone’s doorstep, and after a while, when I noticed we starting flirting a bit,  I said, totally out of the blue: “I am not giving you my phone number”.

There wasn’t a single time when they didn’t start laughing immediately almost uncontrollably. See? They are evaluating you based on their sex-driven perspective. And because women are used to have men asking for their phone numbers like they are on a pedestal, you are doing the exact opposite, you are not giving them a shot of having your phone number. If they weren’t interested, they wouldn’t say anything. If they started laughing immediately, what do you think they were thinking about without telling you?

5 – taller than them – women are more attracted to men that are taller than them. I am 5’6 so this is not going in my favor. I bought shoes with a subtle heel, so I could look taller. This helped. But I can share with you that anytime I got a girl that was taller than me, I almost never closed a sale. and I am very confident this was the main reason. In fact, if you take a look at woman pictures they put themselves to look smaller like looking up. This is sexy for the, to be smaller.

6 – grooming – women spend hours and tons of money on cosmetics, perfumes, doing their make-ups and eyelashes, they have an army of utensils, mirrors and all sorts of stuff to improve their grooming process. They take a bunch of time to dress and getting “ready”, and spend even more time on shops testing out new stuff to improve their looks and appearance.

You already know they are the ultimate “body-language” reading machine.

Now let me ask you: Do you think there is a remote possibility they notice you took a lot of time and effort to dress-up and groom properly? Hand lotions, clean shirts, lip-gloss, immaculate pants?

Oh yes…They notice that. You are showing them signs you take care of yourself, you are showing signs of confidence as you care about your self-image. This goes a long way regarding the image you are projecting of yourself.

7 – getting closer – getting away-from –  this is how I call it. Call it whatever you want, but make sure you use this because this works. When doing a presentation you need to be in front of a woman, not sideways. Stay at one arm’s length so you don’t invade her space, but don’t be further than that as it invokes a lack of confidence. This technique is you getting deliberately away from them and they immediately get closer again. A good example of this was when I was doing presentations and the lights when off. I would stop the presentation using sarcasm and say: Wait! I’ll get the lights on again baby? Wanna see?” I would then run in basketball mode to the switch next to the elevators and then went right to them running, getting to a hand distance from them and the retreat a bit.

The same thing when I was in “forced” counseling with this attractive therapist, I used to sit laidback and sometimes, just for fun, to see if she was into me I leaned forward stood up, and got closer to her.

She immediately curled her hair behind her ears and changed her eye movement.

See? It works. Use it. You will see.

8 – Indirect language – Women are masters at talking indirectly. That’s their thing. So if you learn how to speak indirectly as well, they will see this unusual as you are on their “wavelength” and get instantly attracted, because you just raised your social IQ.

A good example of this is having the conversation in a way that they have to prove themselves to you and not the other way around like most men do where they get all submissive and say: “baby you are beautiful, I love you” and all this crap.

They have to prove themselves to you. They have to be the ones that are worth your time because you are the alpha.

So when you are having a conversation you say something like: “I only deal with beautiful women”. See? You are not saying she is beautiful. You are implying that you only deal with beautiful women. If she is into you, you will see her smile a bit and start looking at you differently.

I once got to this building, and when I rang the doorbell, the girl that opened the door was dressed in this black tight nightgown.

As I was doing my presentation, the whole thing was about lowering the electricity bill, and in the middle of the thing I was like “so the Energy Department: Everyone just tells us all what is the total cost for this home. So, after that everything goes….down…below…” See what I mean, I was indirectly addressing sex in the presentation, undressing her and you know. But I wasn’t saying that explicitly. But nevertheless, they read this like that. I got her to smile instantly.

Practice this. Start coming up with ways of doing your presentations in a way that you are covering sex indirectly with your sales presentation. Men are clueless about this, women, on the other hand, go berserk, as this is a clear sign of high social IQ.

9 – Symmetry – Women love symmetry, so when you are dressing, make sure, your clothes are straight: the shirt line in the button is, is not wavy or anything, and goes straight to the belt zone.

You can use clips to keep the shirt collar straight and avoid wavy and messy looks.

10 – strong jawlines –  women love strong jawlines. To get your with a stronger look, start stretching your neck muscles. I do it 10 times in a row every day. You will start noticing that the jawline becomes more marked. You will look more attractive.

Bonus Tip: The Bad-Boy – women love the bad-boy. The incorrigible loudmouth, that puts himself in dangerous situations, rides a bike and pretty much has a “fuck you” attitude regarding everyone in a social situation, without having a bit of an issue to show signs of the Alpha and put people in their place.

See, women have this maternal instinct, and they feel this energy from you, so their primal instincts go through the rough when they feel the presence of someone like that, as this is unusual.

When I was selling electricity in ghettos, I had this talented and beautiful Brazilian new sales-rep that asked if I could show her the ropes for a couple of days, so she could start doing it for herself, and when I started doing my thing, I noticed she immediately started getting all excited and out of character as these were intense situations. She didn’t just like it, she was aroused by it and she couldn’t hide it.

She was broke and was seeing me getting out of broke by doing something that she could do as well, as most people don’t do this. Especially in those neighborhoods.

She was very beautiful and very talented at dealing with people. So not only this would be a way for her to start getting back on her feet, but she was actually sexually aroused from the experience she was watching.

I’ll be honest with you, if someone told me this, I would be open to the thought of this primal instinct women have, but it is a completely different experience when you watch this happen on a consistent basis. As I have been doing this for so long, I know believe this is a primal instinct women have engraved in their brains, as we as men have ours as well. You just have to learn how to trigger these.

The Shit Test

Now that you know a bit more about woman, here’s the final barrier  to either win or go home when it comes to dealing with them. It’s the shit test.

All this that we have been talking about so far is about you showing yourself as the Alpha, the one that every woman is looking for.

But showing and being in the eyes of a woman requires testing, and this is exaclty what they do. It is a kept secret and called the shit-test because they will say things to you and tell you to do things that if you answer or act incorrectly you will fail and they will get out of the situation.

Women test you for two things:

1 – Consistency  – to see if you keep your word and stand by what you have just said or presented. Alphas are determined. They know what they want and do what they told  you they would do. So if you present things and woman shit-test you and find out you fold and hesitate and shange what you said, you failed. If you keep to your guns, without showing signs of a minor flinch, you will win her over.

An example I can share with you is when one of the sales reps that I was working with, texted me after our meeting. But she did that like at 23.00 at night. We met at 16.00 that day. She sent me a message saying: “can I met you  there at 10.30?”

My reply: “We will be there at 9.00”

See what I mean? Consistency. Don’t be apologetic, don’t try to be nice, don’t show signs of being upset, don’t call them, just be blunt. You are the boss. They have to prove themselves to you and not the other way around.

The next day? She was there at 9.00, didn’t talk about the text message and was all over me.

2 – Compliance  – to see if you do what they tell you to do. If you comply this means you are not the Alpha. Alphas don’t answer do anyone. People answer to alphas. So if a woman tells you to do something, you don’t do it.

Now that you know these two important definitions, let’s put them into practical examples:

As I was presenting at a door-to-door situation, the lights of the corridor were on a timer, after a couple of minutes the timer shut down the lights.

The first thing they said was. “turn on the light there”…see? Compliance.

What did I do? I said: “I’m fine”, and kept presenting.

It sounds weird right? Because you need lights to present them numbers with graphics and all that.So on face value there wouldn’t be anything underlying their request, right? Wrong. They don’t care about that. They are testing you to see who you are and only then they start paying more attention to what is it that you are there selling them.

People pay more attention to your body-language than what you are saying, this is why you need your pitch memorized. So as they said that I kept presenting, even in pitch-black, as the lights went off. What did they do? They turned on their door-step light. See? Compliance. But now it is one point in your favor. They have just complied to you. It is a subconscious thing, but you just got them to agree to do something for you.

Another example that I often see is at shopping malls. At the time of this article we are going through the covid-19 thing, but under a normal circumstance, I like to go to crowded environments and just watch people’s interactions, to see if I spot somwthing new so I can work on the riddle.

Doing this, I’ve noticed a pattern: Man with the baby stroller and/or carrying a woman’s purse. This is a clear sign of compliance and that he is not the alpha. She is! Are you telling me she doesn’t have th bicep power to carry her own purse?

And while he was her “employee/slave”, she was all dressed in red on Instagram and looking at other men. What does that tell you?

But a woman, unless she has lost all the respect for you, she won’t tell you: “go get the car” or “take my purse”, she will say it that like a “it’s not a big of a deal, hope you don’t mind…” manner, but believing this would be shooting yourself in the foot.

My girlfriend told me: “can you take the baby?”

My answer: “something wrong with your arms?”

She took the baby.

Next time, this was different: “Can you help me with this box, I’ll carry the groceries”

See what I mean? Completely different. There is an exchange this time. She is doing something in conjunction with you, not telling you to act as a subordinade.

if you keep consistent at this, she will stop doing it. As she will see you are consistent and don’t comply.

The Eyes and Women

The final nail in the coffin is the eye realm. If you get this right, you will get more women. Guaranteed! And to prove that to you, I’ll share some of the experiences I usually go through when selling door-to-door.

Women are as much if not more proned to sex than men. But the main difference between both is that they are not obvious, they are subtile and indirect.

Women are very different than man in this arena. They want to feel comfort in the look of the men’s eyes. How do you show them this comfort when you are in front of a woman? You think about having sex with her. Not in a creepy way, not like you are a weirdo, just that look where you are loooking at her, with this indirect smile and both of you are having sex.

You don’t say a word about it, you don’t display any behavior that is sex-oriented, it’s just this look at her, straight to her eyes, without flinching.

For all the money in the world, just do this. It works every single time. If she was suspicious, or worried abour opening the door and if you keep talking with this soothing deep voice, looking at her, directly in her eyes with this mindset, she will calm down, and you will feel that. Remember that in most cases, men are usually much stronger than women, so if you transmit this sexy soothing, radio-voice vibe, whe will relax, and you can start comanding the relationship. In this especific case, getting out of there with a signed contract.

If you ever read to take your eyes of a women when she is directly looking at you, it is a lie. Never, ever, ever, ever, EVER take your eyes of a woman…EVER!

You’ll ruin everything as she will think  you are hiding something.


I hope you found this useful. Woman are a different discipline of study in Psychology as you need to address certain aspects. As you start doing this more and more, you will be more accurate in your assessments, and start seeing your encounters turn more in your favor.

Let me know if you have further questions, so I can help.

About Diogo Marques

Life Insurance Salesman

Diogo Marques is a professional Life Insurance Salesman based in Portugal.

He spends his days selling door-to-door to business owners and has a lifetime mission to make $2.0 Billion in Life Insurance Commissions.


The post how to attract women: the ultimate guide appeared first on Diogo Marques.

This post first appeared on Learn Sales, please read the originial post: here

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