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Smoking Catnip for Dummies: Everything You Need (or Wanted) to Know About Meowijuana

cat smoking catnip

So you want to smoke Catnip, huh? You crazy, crazy bastard…

Smoking catnip certainly isn’t something your everyday, average Joe Schmoe ever really thinks about ever doing, you’re at least to be commended on your efforts to research this topic first before sparking up that sweet, sweet meowijuana. So, consider this a formal commendation. Well done!

So, what exactly happens when one smokes catnip? Is it dangerous? Is the smoke dangerous if inhaled by your (hopefully) smoking buddy Tinkles the cat? Most importantly of all, does it give you any kind of high whatsoever?

Worry not, my groovy, creative, young sir or madam, because we’re here to help you learn all this and then some because, well… that’s just what we do around here. We try to help people and… stuff.

Regardless, you’ve come to the right place. So let’s jump into the lesson, shall we?

  • The Basics

Catnip (also known via its scientific name, Nepeta cataria) surprisingly enough belongs in the mint family. While originally native to Europe, it spread to other continents after sea voyage and trade became more common back around the 1500’s.

Now known pretty much universally as catnip (although we much prefer our new invented name of meowijuana), it was also known as catswort and fieldbalm back in the day.

  • Health/Medicinal Benefits

Believe it or not, catnip also has a slew of various medical benefits and has long been used in China (because… of course it was) for treating a variety of different health problems.

In addition to helping aid healthy digestion, catnip can also act as a sedative, menstruation promoter, tranquilizer, and even as a cure for infant colic. It can additionally be ingested in tea form to reap its many benefits. Catnip tea itself has long been used many European countries as a remedy for the common cold, chest congestion and to even help loosen up relaxed muscles.

Chewing the leaves of the plant has also been known to help relieve toothaches, offering a surprisingly pleasant and aromatic flavor – arguably the exact opposite of what you’d think catnip would actually taste like.

Although thought of as a beneficial side effect when used for the treatment of fever, smoking the plant promotes mild to moderate sweating, which is obviously a negative side effect (unless you’re an absolute goof who actually enjoys getting all soaked, gross and sweaty).

Lastly, as all of this weren’t enough already, smoking catnip can and has been used to treat both asthma and bronchitis.

Like most medicinal herbs and plants, the overall effect of administering catnip on humans can vary greatly depending on the method of consumption. In addition to smoking it, chewing it and making tea with it as we’ve already discussed, one can also concentrate the plant (and naturally amplify its benefits in the process) into a potent tincture. But this is an extremely lengthy and complicated process we shall discuss in detail on some other (preferably rainy) day.

catnip pipes

  • Meowijuana Basics & Effects

Now that we’ve covered the brief history and health/medicinal benefits of catnip, it’s now time to get into the nitty-gritty of what you came here for in the first place: how to smoke the plant and the various effects one can expect after the session.

As a forewarning (of sorts, although knowing you, this will probably both thrill and excite you a great deal), if enough of the catnip plant itself is smoked, it can have hallucinogenic effects. This is coincidentally why catnap was extremely popular back in the 1960’s (because… of course it was).

Before anything else, it’s imperative that you ensure that your catnip leaves and/or flowers are completely dry. Not that catnip ever really tends to be sold wet or anything, but just make sure you didn’t accidentally put the leaves/flowers onto a damp countertop or table or something.

Upon smoking catnip, one can expect a mild to moderate sense of calm and relaxation. Many users have even reported a mild sense of euphoria after smoking catnip, oftentimes coupled with a sense of giddiness to go along with it.

A small dose of catnip is generally regarded as about 1.0 – 1.5 grams for the average person. Smoking this amount will generally not produce any strong effects and lasts only for about 2-3 hours. Smoking upwards of 2.0 – 3.0 grams is generally recommended to achieve optimal benefits.

However, you should obviously utilize common sense and discretion the first time you try smoking catnip. This can be accomplished by first administering a small dose (about 0.5 grams or so) to your eager, excited lungs in order to make sure you don’t experience any immediate negative or allergic effects.

  • Negative Side Effects and Disclaimer

Although there’s really no “hangover” after smoking catnip, some people have experienced common, negative side effects such as a headache or feeling nauseas. If you smoke a large enough dose, you may also feel dizzy or disoriented after finishing your session.

Obviously, if you’re pregnant then you should avoid smoking, drinking, chewing or even coming into contact with catnip in any capacity at all, really. Despite the Food and Drug Administration deeming catnip as a plant of “undefined safety”, there’ve been no official reports of toxic reactions to smoking the plant. Not to mention the fact that it’s been used all throughout the world for hundreds upon hundreds of years.

So just use common sense, be safe and enjoy your experience with smoking meowijuana. Now go and spark it up, son!

This post first appeared on Funny Stories, Funny Articles, Funny Videos, please read the originial post: here

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Smoking Catnip for Dummies: Everything You Need (or Wanted) to Know About Meowijuana


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