My Mom: What would you like for your Mother’s Day?
Me: Don’t be ridiculous! Your time is enough…are you free to babysit Friday?

— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) April 27, 2017

“Wait, when is Mother’s Day?”

-Me, borderline panicked, every Saturday night in April.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) April 2, 2016

Everyday is Mother’s Day when it begins and ends with wine.

— OneFunnyMummy (@OneFunnyMummy) May 8, 2014

I don’t know what my husband is planning for Mother’s Day but I sure hope it involves me sleeping all day.

— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) May 4, 2016

7y.o: “Mom, what do you want for Mother’s Day?”

Me: “Sleep.”

7: “Haha, no seriously, Mom; something REAL.”

Exactly.

— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 24, 2017

happy Mother’s Day to my mom, who has given me the gift of love + not trying to join all my social networks

— Nicole Chung (@nicole_soojung) May 11, 2014

My daughter wrote, “I will see you every day of our lives,” on my Mother’s Day card, so I guess we’ve resorted to threats now.

— Stella G. Maddox (@StellaGMaddox) May 8, 2016

Mother’s Day is a special day when I get to do the dishes and yell at people to stop making siren noises while I wear a macaroni necklace.

— Walking Outside (@WalkingOutside) May 8, 2016

I think my kids are being extra bad tonight so that tomorrow I’m grateful they are gifting me with mediocre behavior for Mother’s Day.

— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) May 10, 2014

4yo: Happy Mother’s Day, daddy!
Me: Thanks!

(I don’t think he’s grasping the concept)

— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) May 11, 2014

“Mom, make me cereal.”
“It’s Mother’s Day, you make ME cereal.”
“Well when’s Kid’s Day?”
“It’s every day.”
“See? YOU should make ME cereal.”

— Brenna Jennings (@SuburbanSnaps) May 12, 2013

My kid just ate her carrots without being forced.

*checks calendar to see if it’s Mother’s Day

— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) April 6, 2015

When you have little ones, it’s not really Mother’s Day…it’s more like Mother’s 22 minutes to an hour, tops.

— Domestic Goddess (@DomesticGoddss) May 2, 2016

The Mother’s Day fairy didn’t come. The kids are still fighting.

— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) May 10, 2015

My biggest gift to myself this Mother’s Day will be teaching my kids how to do the laundry from this point forward.

— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) May 8, 2016

Disposing of the dead flowers and cleaning the vase should be part of the Mother’s Day gift.

— Ash (@cray_at_home_ma) May 15, 2016

It’s Mother’s Day weekend.

But I’m out of wine.

Explain.

— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) May 8, 2016

All I want for Mother’s Day is a live-in maid, personal chef, and masseuse. Fingers crossed! #reasonable

— nicole tersigni (@nicsigni) May 9, 2012